Big Feartie: Which MP Gassed the Chamber?

Watch as SNP MP Patricia Gibson recoils in horror and wafts the air as one of her colleagues lets rip in the Commons:

And everyone thought the chamber emptied because Clegg got up to speak…

UPDATE: The guilty culprit has been identified as Labour MP Richard Burgon.

The Queen: Psychoactive Drugs

Big Tobacco Firms Take Government to Court

jti-wto

JTI, the owners of Benson and Hedges, follow British American Tobacco (Rothmans, Dunhill) and Philip Morris Inc. (Marlboro) into the High Courts to protect the billions they have invested in their brands. If the High Court does not protect or compensate them for their losses from the planned censorship by plain packaging, they will go to the WTO in Geneva for protection. This battle is not over yet…

24 Hour Drinking: In Numbers

Today’s new Institute of Economic Affairs report by Christopher Snowdon looks at the impact of 24 hour drinking. Guido has crunched the numbers into a handy infographic:

As the report finds: “Facilitating longer opening hours may have been the best thing the Labour Party ever did…”

Hilton’s Hipsters & High Tories

hilton-more-human

Tonight’s launch party for Steve Hilton’s new book More Human brought out an A-list crowd of high Tories and hipsters. Held in Rohan Silva’s SecondHome tech hub in East London it was more a Cameroon re-union party than a book launch. In the wigwam Hilton, dressed appropriately in guru colours of yellow and orange, held court to a crowd including David Cameron and George Osborne as well as Cabinet ministers from past and present. Jeremy Hunt mingled with the likes of Lord Heseltine and Lord Howard among internet hipsters whilst entertained by a Hungarian folk band – much to the amusement of Steve Hilton’s mum. This was the authentic über-modernisers wigwam in which Rohan invited the assembled great and the good to wander barefoot…

Hilton’s speech was one of thanks and a lighthearted powerpoint remembering his time on Team Cameron. He spoke of the stream of emails he received in California before the election complaining about the negativity of the Tory campaign, all imploring him to come and bring some sunshine into the Tory message, “I said, look Dave, you hired Lynton Crosby…”.  The PM laughed…

https://twitter.com/SebastianEPayne/status/600735366556057601/photo/1

The Hungarian band played on – with the crowd joining in to sing “Happy Birthday” to Oliver Letwin. Heseltine flirted with twentysomethings, Samantha Cameron beamed at Gabby Bertin. All is well now Miliband’s red terror has been defeated. Apart from Steve Hilton wanting to overthrow global capitalism…

Watch also: Steve Hilton’s Trippy Newsnight Segment 

Sports and Social is SNP’s Next Target

It’s not just Labour’s traditional seats in the Commons that the SNP are after, now the nationalist horde are coming for their favourite bar. The taxpayer-subsidised Sports and Social Club is popular with Labour MPs and their visiting trade union brothers, earning it the nickname “The Sports and Socialist”, but change is coming. As Guido revealed in the Sun yesterday, plans are afoot amongst SNP MPs to rename the dingy watering hole the “Rabbie Burns Bar”.

Finally Ed Balls Masters the Line

The Shadow Chancellor visited a community centre in Kilburn this afternoon. There was line dancing.

The worrying thing is he knows the moves…

Footage via Richard Osley

Jim Murphy Reacts to Ipsos Mori Poll

An unfortuante juxtaposition as news of Labour’s impending doom in Scotland broke on Sky…

UPDATE:

And Now… a Party Political Broadcast From the ‘Cannabis is Safer Than Alcohol’ Party

[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +

Bong! Bong! Bong! BBC News Theme is “Massive Club Banger”

Definitely not ripping off Bill Bailey, Radio 1 DJ Greg James says he “realised the full potential” of the BBC News theme as “a massive club banger”. Hereford was on one (o’clock news)…[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +

Tory Ball Goodie Bag

Tory Black & White Ball Goodie Bag

What do you get in a Tory Black & White Ball goodie bag? Despite the pricey £15,000-a-table tickets, you get tat…

A tea-towel emblazoned with “The problem with socialism…” quote from Maggie, a Conservative Foundation paper bookmark seeking a cheery mention in your will, a plastic pen, Tory drinks coaster, a “securing a better future” blue piggy bank (hint), a bumper sticker and a canvas bag with election slogans on them.[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +

Green Party Leader Natalie Bennett Stoner Shocker! Hesitates Before Admitting Dope Smoking

Green leader Natalie Bennett hesitated just a little too long under the forensic questioning of LBC’s Duncan Barkes this lunchtime:

DB: “Are you a drug user?”

NB: “Um, er, I… have a glass of wine most evenings…”

Natalie revealed she used to smoke dope but insisted she doesn’t “dabble” any more.[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +

Plain Pack Fireworks Expected at CabinetOsborne, May & Hammond Confront Hunt Over Pack Backtrack

Word reaches Guido that there is serious consternation amongst a number of senior Tories over the way in which last week’s surprise announcement about plain packaging was squeezed out like an awkward fart. Usually reliable sources suggest Osborne is set to raise it at Cabinet this morning, with Jeremy Hunt in the sights for a proper going over.[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +

Some Sad News…

A sad day in libertarian circles as it emerges young campaigner Christina Annesley has died while on holiday in Thailand.

The one time Tory turned ‘Kipper turned vocal free spirit was a regular on the young right-wing scene and was just 23 years old.[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +

BREAKING: Plain Packaging is Happening…

CONFIRMED: As Guido predicted, Jane Ellison just announced the government will go ahead with standardised packaging.[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +

Burnham Bounces Balls into £11 Billion Spending Pledge

BURNHAM-BALLS

Shadow Health Secretary Andy Burnham has been out and about this morning pushing Labour’s public health manifesto. It basically amounts to yet another series of caps – the usual series of nanny state, anti–business policies.

It wasn’t the detail which interested Guido – more then timing of the announcement.[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +



Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

Michael Gove to the Commons on Trident:

“The unilateralists opposite complaining today are in the position of eunuchs complaining about the cost of Viagra.”

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.

Facebook

Corbynista Stoke Candidate Rails Against PLP Corbynista Stoke Candidate Rails Against PLP
Government Trident Spin Misfires Government Trident Spin Misfires
TfL Told Khan he Could Freeze All Fares TfL Told Khan he Could Freeze All Fares
Watch: Jez Called “S***” on Train Watch: Jez Called “S***” on Train
Watch: May Refuses to Answer Trident Questions Four Times Watch: May Refuses to Answer Trident Questions Four Times
FULL-LENGTH TRUMP INAUGURATION SPEECH FULL-LENGTH TRUMP INAUGURATION SPEECH
Farage Hired by Fox News Farage Hired by Fox News
UKIP Announce Nuttall for Stoke UKIP Announce Nuttall for Stoke
Osborne Buries BlackRock News Osborne Buries BlackRock News
UKIP Out-NHS Labour in Copeland UKIP Out-NHS Labour in Copeland
Labour Copeland Candidate’s Son is True Lad Labour Copeland Candidate’s Son is True Lad
Govt Cancels Carbon Capture Govt Cancels Carbon Capture
Seamus Officially Leaves Guardian Seamus Officially Leaves Guardian
Article 50 Splits Shadow Cabinet Article 50 Splits Shadow Cabinet
Revenge Porn Momentum Candidate Quits Revenge Porn Momentum Candidate Quits
Red Len’s Hospitality Hypocrisy Red Len’s Hospitality Hypocrisy
Momentum Man is Porn Baron Momentum Man is Porn Baron
PMQs Sketch – Labour MPs Googling Museum Directorships PMQs Sketch – Labour MPs Googling Museum Directorships
NEC Fudges Danczuk Decision NEC Fudges Danczuk Decision