Rich’s Monday Morning View

French Populist Wins Presidency

Marine Le Pen has conceded, Macron is projected to win 2 to 1 votes…

Paris Advertising for British Financiers to Move

paiisfrogs

Paris is trying to lure British financiers to leave London for the City of Lights with this advert. Apart from the reality that London has fog about as often as Paris there are some other problems with financiers moving to the continent. Here is a list:

  • London has 41% of the foreign exchange market, Paris 3%. London trades more €uros than Paris, Frankfurt and Milan combined. The numbers for all other sectors of finance are similar. Bonds, equities and derivatives trading are centred on London. More funds are managed in London’s glitzy West End than Paris, never mind the Square Mile itself or Canary Wharf.
  • Charles De Gaulle airport will have you wishing for the joys of Heathrow.
  • The French bureaucracy is legendary, French labour laws explain why so many French entrepreneurs come to London to start-up.
  • Socialist France’s taxes explain why there are some 300,000 French men and women working in London.
  • Everything shuts early, for lunch, on Sunday, on Sartre’s birthday, whenever you need something urgently.
  • Property in Central Paris is nearly as expensive as Central London. Paris rents are the second highest in Europe.
  • Parisians are famously rude to foreigners, to the point of racist.
  • Paris smells of urine.

Paris is great for a romantic weekend, London’s real rival for the financial capital of the world is New York…

Hollande’s Calais Threat to British Voters

Earlier a French minister threatened to end border controls in Calais if Britain votes to Leave, now Hollande is making empty ultimatums to British voters. Asked specifically about what would happen to Calais border controls post-Brexit, Hollande warned:

“I don’t want to scare you. I just want to say the truth. There will be consequences if the United Kingdom is to leave the EU… I don’t want to give you catastrophic scenarios, but there will be consequences … especially in the way we handle the situation in terms of immigration. There is no solution where there is no consequences.”

Cameron just stands there and smiles. Does Hollande really think British voters are going to be threatened by a Miliband-loving, triple-dipping, pint-sized French socialist philanderer?

Political Prisoners to Be Freed in Liberated Venezuela

Two weeks after the centre-right candidate ousted Corbyn-loving Cristina de Kirchner in Argentina, now the left’s darling in the socialist paradise of Venezuela has been trounced in the polls. Nicolas Maduro’s Socialist party has lost control of the National Assembly, with the opposition gaining 99 seats. The happy results mean that political prisoners caged at the hands of the repressive Maduro regime will finally be released. Owen Jones, Diane Abbott, Grahame Morris, Colin Burgon, Richard Burgon, Tariq Ali, George Galloway, Ken Livingstone, Seumas Milne, Jeremy Corbyn – your boys took one hell of a beating.

In France, final estimates of their regional election results have the Front National in first place on 28%. The ruling socialist grouping slipped to 23.5%, while the right-wing grouping took 27%. Socialism is being rolled back across the world, just in time for Christmas…

Boris Recites La Marseillaise

Guido is off to Wembley. Vive la France!

Paris Attackers: “F***ing Arseholes”

Good rant from John Oliver:

“It is important to remember that nothing about what these arseholes are trying to do is going to work, and I’ll tell you why: If you’re in a war of culture and lifestyle with France – good f*cking luck…” 

Vive la France…

Who Were the Paris Attackers?

Sorry Obama Couldn’t Be Bothered, But Here’s James Taylor

John Kerry reaffirmed his status as international diplomacy’s leading pillock this afternoon with his excruciatingly embarrassing apology to France. After no senior American official could be bothered to attend the unity rally in Paris last week, John Kerry stowed James Taylor in his hand luggage for his visit to the French capital. Taylor was paraded at a press conference to sing “You’ve got a friend…” Which wasn’t at all awkward…

What Would Prime Minister Miliband Be Like?

yeah

Today the French press and social media are convulsed with a hat-related collective “Why is our president an embarrassing jerk?” spasm.

Guido would like to point out that “Hollande” is the French word for “Miliband”…

‘Tis the Eve of St Crispin’s Day, Dave…

On which day, according to Shakespeare, the leader of the English told the herald of the Constable of France:

Come thou no more for ransom, gentle herald:
They shall have none, I swear, but these my joints;
Which if they have as I will leave ’em them,
Shall yield them little, tell the constable.

“…he which hath no stomach to this fight, let him depart…”

Hollibandism Sees Foreign Direct Investment Fall 77%

Hollibandism

The economic numbers coming out of France are horrific, the Wall Street Journal is reporting that new investments by foreign businesses in France fell sharply in 2013 by 77%.  A collapse of international confidence in France…

By contrast, foreign investment in Angela Merkel’s Germany almost quadrupled, even in Spain, Italy and Ireland foreign investment rose. The explanation is that France has a left-wing socialist government. Hollande’s great admirer Ed Miliband is likewise promising to bring back socialism to Britain:

“What President Hollande is seeking to do in France and what he is seeking to do in leading the debate in Europe is find that different way forward. We are in agreement in seeking that new way that needs to be found and I think can be found.”

Terrifying…

City AM Sparks Diplomatic Incident With France

The French Embassy has taken French-born Allister Heath’s column on their government’s failed socialist experiment personally. Since there is definitely nothing else interesting going on in France at the moment, they took the time to condemn the piece as an “ideological mix of prejudice and error” with a contender for the worst ‘listicle’ ever made. Best of all, they lay into the NHS as “ailing” and suffering from “years of under-investment”. William Hague is no doubt summoning the French ambassador to the Foreign Office as we speak. Journalists may be of a different breed across the channel, though maybe the Embassy should sort out their own philandering, partner-traumatising President before they start having a pop at us…

François Hollande Abandons “Milibandism”

In a panicky new year message France’s President François Hollande has pledged to cut public spending, lower taxes and reduce labour costs for businesses in a bid to convince French voters that he is trying to avert le triple dip. The opposite of the policies which can be described as “Milibandism”.

It seems only yesterday that Ed was welcomed onto the steps of the Elysee Palace with a handshake from his new best comrade, saying:

milibande

“What President Hollande is seeking to do in France and what he is seeking to do in leading the debate in Europe is find that different way forward. We are in agreement in seeking that new way that needs to be found and I think can be found.”

Socialist Hollande now has the lowest net approval rating ever recorded for a French President at +20%. When you are a loser no one wants to shake your hand, as this batch of photos of Hollande with world leaders shows. Well, all apart from one other socialist leader with an even worse net approval rating of -34%, Monsieur Miliband…

Sun Readers Gave More for Typhoon Haiyan Than France

Le Triple Dip For Hollibande

Socialist France has fallen into a triple dip recession this morning, Francois Hollande marks his first anniversary of being sworn in with his economy shrinking by 0.2% in the first quarter this year. One thing you won’t be hearing this side of the channel today is any more talk from Ed Miliband of a “united front” with France’s enterprise-destroying tax-obsessed corruption hit growth killer. Nothing of last summer’s Hollibande agreement for a “different way forward”, or Ed’s ill-fated praise for the French leader’s “determination to create jobs and growth”. Come 2015, don’t say they didn’t warn you…

See also:

Trident Costs a Bomb

trident-costs-a-bomb

During the Cold War no one was keener on deterring the Soviet Union than Guido; Trident, Pershing and Cruise missiles meant that the Red Army stayed in Russia. That deployment and the threatened development of the Strategic Defense Initiative bankrupted the USSR and ran up the US deficit, prompting Ronald Reagan to quip that he didn’t worry about the deficit, it was “big enough to look after itself”.

Britain’s ageing sea-based Trident fleet is up for replacement and the price tag is expected to be £100 billion of borrowed money. With no super-power enemy threatening the defence of the realm this is an expensive bit of willy-waving in an age of austerity. Even conservative US military strategists question the logic of the UK spending a third of the defence budget on a Cold War era system at the expense of conventional forces. Trident will cost every man, woman and child in Britain £1,400 that will have to be borrowed.

The French manage to have a modest nuclear deterrent without paying the Yanks billions they can’t afford; the Force de Frappe and the Force Océanique Stratégique. Surely Britain can as well?

Britain is capable of building, without U.S. assistance, cruise-type missiles which can be air-launched and modifying Astute class attack submarines with sea-launched cruise missiles. This would have a number of advantages; it would be a truly independent deterrent unlike Trident (which is only in theory independent), it would cost a fraction of what it will cost to upgrade Trident and it would be entirely British built rather than an expensive import. Obviously this new, smart, fearsome combined all-British defence system would be a Highly Independent, Lethal Defence Arsenal – HILDA. She would go on and on defending Britain for the rest of the century…

After Merkozy, Whatever Happened to Hollibande?

François Hollande is at an all-time low after the Socialist government’s “Monsieur Propre” (Mr Clean), Jérôme Cahuzac, admitted to having a “bank account abroad” for the past two decades. The former budget minister with responsibility for cracking down on tax dodgers admitted to holding €600,000 in an illegal offshore bank account at UBS Switzerland. Hollande is now facing questions about exactly what he knew and when. Scandals are arguably the least of Hollande’s worries. His flagship 75% top rate of tax has been ruled unconstitutional, wealth creators and film stars alike are fleeing his tax tyranny. This week his new supertax on companies has been shunned by business leaders, and even the left-wing press are abandoning him. As unemployment hits a 16-year high, Hollande’s approval rating is at a record low for any leader so early into his mandate. France is suffering from the disastrous consequences of electing the socialist president.

Where is Ed Miliband in all this? Last summer Ed was welcomed onto the steps of the Elysee Palace by his new best friend, declaring:

“What President Hollande is seeking to do in France and what he is seeking to do in leading the debate in Europe is find that different way forward. We are in agreement in seeking that new way that needs to be found and I think can be found.”

As is plain for all to see, Hollande’s “different way forward” is dragging his country to her knees. Even Ed knows this, notice how he doesn’t seem to talk about his old pal François so much any more? France should serve as a warning to us all of what would happen under Monsieur Millibande…

World Exclusive: Jean Michel Jarre Says Au Revoir Socialism Rock Star’s Secret Downing Street Talks About London Move

JARRE

Jean Michel Jarre, the only French global rock star, has been into Downing Street to discuss moving to London to escape Francois Hollande’s tax hikes. The French President wants confiscatory 75% tax rates for high earners.

In secrecy Jarre recently visited Number 10 to discuss his “defection”. The news that Downing Street is involved in discussions with another high profile tax exile from France will cause outrage in the Elysee Palace. Gerard Depardieu’s planned flight from Paris to a small village less than half a mile across the Belgian border caused an uproar and French Prime Minister Jean-Marc Ayrault  went so far as to call him “pathetic.”

gerarDepardieu countered that “I am leaving because you believe that success, creation, talent, anything different must be sanctioned”. Cinema legends such as Brigitte Bardot and Catherine Denueve quickly jumped in with statements of support for Depardieu. The rock star’s move comes shortly after Bernard Arnault, CEO of luxury giant LVMH and France’s richest man, national hero Johnny Hallyday and actor Alain Delon have also left France for tax reasons. London estate agents report French investment bankers, private equity financiers and high paid entrepreneurs making inquiries.

hollande-no-10When Hollande announced his 75% tax rate plan Cameron joked that he would “roll out the red carpet” for French tax exiles to the expressed annoyance of the Elysee Palace. French ministers widely criticised Cameron. The news that it was not mere rhetoric and Downing Street would literally welcome French rock star tax exiles onto the red carpet at No. 10 will infuriate President Hollande…

UPDATE: Downing Street were at lunchtime knocking down this story, by late afternoon they changed their synthesiser tune and said Jarre was indeed in talks to move his technology company to the government sponsored Tech City in London. Where the taxes are lower…

Guido’s Downing Street source says “He’s been into No. 10 to talk to us about defection – it’s like a crappy old spy movie…” The channel replacing the Berlin Wall, with French capitalists fleeing socialist France for freedom…

Hollande Left With Oeuf on Face

It turns out President Hollande was all mouth and no trousers last week as he tried to mock Team GB’s medal haul:

“We don’t talk of money, we talk of gold. The British have rolled out a red carpet for French athletes to win medals.

[…] Read the rest

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