“Seumas, I’m Not Sure This Is a Great Idea”

Pictured on the terrace of a 5-star hotel on Thursday evening, married Labour spin chief Seumas Milne getting hard left with a mystery blonde. The photos show shameless Seumas at the plush Courthouse Hotel in Shoreditch – the opposite side of London to his Richmond family home – where a standard room costs £300 per night. Milne can be seen leaning in for a passionate kiss, before hugging his lady companion and sitting with her legs draped across him.

A bystander said:

“They had a table to themselves. He was drinking a pink cocktail type thing. She looked younger than he is, I would say in her early thirties, early-to-mid thirties. They were there for a good hour or so. They were very hands on, full on heavy petting. There was a lot of hugging, stroking, kissing and intimate talking going on. The photo where her her head is nestled into him – that was them getting off, that was them mid-snog. We saw them leave together down the walkway back inside the hotel.”

Asked if he wanted to comment when doorstepped by The Sun last night, Seumas, who is married to 60 year-old Cristina Montanari, replied: “I don’t think so“. When the spokesman needs a spokesman…

Call 0709 284 0531 for picture syndication.

May to Schmooze MPs at No.10 Party Tonight

“I don’t gossip. I don’t go drinking in Parliament’s bars. I don’t often wear my heart on my sleeve. I just get on with the job in front of me,” Theresa May is famously fond of telling us. As a sign of how much things have changed, this evening she is throwing a drinks party for Tory MPs at Number 10, taking the unprecedented step of schmoozing her own MPs. Colleagues say this is a rare occurrence – not many of these events have taken place under May. Good to see the PM finally come round to the merits of a drink and a gossip…

Last Orders For UKIP: Manifesto Calls For Fewer Boozers

Perhaps the most surprising upshot from UKIP’s manifesto launch is that the party of Nigel Farage has made a pledge unlikely to be popular with the pub trade. The manifesto argues for the repeal of the 2003 Licensing Act, Blair’s ‘cafe culture’ law which brought in late opening hours, and appears to want to cut the number of pubs:

“To protect emergency workers from abuse, we will repeal the 2003 Licensing Act and bring in new legislation to reduce the density of alcohol outlets and restrict trading times.”

“Reduce the density of alcohol outlets”! What would Nigel say?

H/T Henry Mance

Labour Peer: Laura K’s Grandfather Turning in Grave

Piss artiste peer Lord Foulkes seems to have suffered from the perils of post-lunch tweeting. Foulkes has continued the latest unsavoury Labour trend of using BBC journalists’ families against them, writing that Laura Kuenssberg’s late grandfather would be “turning in his grave” at her apparently biased reporting. Stay classy…

Salmond Campaigning Hard

All that campaigning clearly getting the better of Alex Salmond. A well-earned kip on the flight home after a glass of his favourite pink bubbly…

Len and Seumas’ Champagne Celebration

Allies of Len McCluskey mocked Gerard Coyne and Labour Blairites earlier by claiming they would be drowning their sorrows with “Peroni and chablis”. Well, tonight Red Len is drinking champagne at a victory party with Seumas Milne and a who’s who of lefties at Boot and Flogger by London Bridge. A bar in the heart of the City, famous for serving champagne in tankards…

UPDATE: The cheapest bottle of champagne at Len’s victory party is £51. The group have got through 20+ bottles of bubbly as of 8:52pm.

Polish MP Complains About Jean-Claude Druncker

Polish MP Krystyna Pawłowicz has written to Jean-Claude Juncker complaining that his “obvious alcohol dependency” has become a “problem of the entire European community”. Pawłowicz claims Juncker’s drinking was “particularly distasteful and out of place” during the visit of Pope Francis and accuses him of “offensive” behaviour towards “women who were certainly too polite to ask you to take a rest”.

No one would ever have known

UKIP Toast Loss of Only MP

With a nod to Douglas Carswell’s trademark sunglasses emoji, UKIP’s NEC break open the bubbly to toast the loss of their only MP…

Boris and Dave ‘Stood on Chairs’ at Harlem Restaurant

Twitter employee Joanna Geary was in the Red Rooster restaurant in Harlem last night when she bumped into the Foreign Secretary dining with an old friend. She says “I hadn’t seen David until Boris said “‘I suspect you’ll recognise my friend David’ and pointed in his direction”. Team Boris strongly deny allegations of dad dancing, though Reuters‘ Anjuli Davies alleges some standing on chairs:

UPDATE: A spokesman for Boris Johnson said: “The picture is of Boris trying to get out of a very tight seating area against the wall in the restaurant. Nearly all the other members of the group on that side had to do the same (step up and over) to get out.

Once a Bullingdon boy…

Hammond Invites Colleagues to Reconciliation Drinkies

After days of vicious negative briefings against him from Number 10, and 19 Tory MPs publicly opposing his Budget, Philip Hammond is looking to heal wounds. This afternoon the Chancellor invited MPs to a reconciliation drinks party at his Commons office, where he will no doubt be reassuring colleagues over his National Insurance rise. (Or ditching it.) Note the date, March 27, is one of the rumoured dates Article 50 could be triggered. Guido has the invitation:

Subject: Chancellor Drinks Reception – Monday 27 March

Dear Colleague,

I am writing to invite you to drinks with the Chancellor, on Monday 27th March, 18.30 – 19.30. The event will take place in the Chancellor’s Commons Office, Room 21c Ministerial Corridor.

Please let me know if you are able to attend.

Very best

John Glen MP
PPS to Rt Hon Philip Hammond MP

Assume Theresa May’s aides are NFI…

Sham-pagne Socialist

Via the EyeSpy.MP Twitter account, Shami reportedly on the fizz this afternoon as her colleagues in the Lords begin their Brexit debate…

Relative of Nicola Sturgeon “Burned Money in front of Homeless Man”

Guido can reveal that the Cambridge student who allegedly burnt a £20 note in front of a homeless man is related to Scottish First Minister Nicola Sturgeon. Ronald Coyne, a law student at Pembroke College who is a member of the Cambridge University Conservative Association, was filmed brandishing the cash and a cigarette lighter last week. Sources tell Guido that Coyne has previously repeatedly boasted about his relationship to Sturgeon. A Scottish government spokesman says they are not “directly” related. A senior Scottish government source confirms to Guido that they are “distant” relatives by marriage. 

Coyne has been expelled by the Cambridge University Conservative Association following the incident. A CUCA spokesman told Guido:

This occurred in the private capacity of the individual – he was not attending a CUCA event. Despite this, his membership was immediately revoked when we heard what had happened.

A University spokesperson said:

The University is committed to respecting the rights and dignity of all members of our community. We expect our students to treat others with respect, courtesy and consideration at all times, and the University takes allegations of unacceptable behaviour very seriously. We do not comment on individual cases.

Coyne did not respond to Guido’s repeated attempts to contact him. Most embarrassing for Nicola that he’s a Tory…

Article 50 Party at Downing Street Next Week

The tabling of the Article 50 Bill was an historic moment that Eurosceptics have waited decades to witness, and Downing Street will be throwing a party next week for Tory MPs to celebrate. On Tuesday the Commons is sitting until midnight for the Bill’s second reading. Thirsty MPs in need of refreshments can decamp to Number 9 Downing Street from 7pm where chief whip Gavin Williamson and party chairman Patrick McLoughlin will be hosting colleagues at a bash “to mark this significant event”. As invites to Downing Street drinkies go, this will be one of the best-received in years…

“Jeremy is Full of Sh*t!” Liverpool Fans Give Corbyn a Song

On Saturday afternoon Jeremy Corbyn had the misfortune of sharing a train carriage with a group of refreshed Liverpool fans still smarting from their defeat at home to struggling Swansea. The Scousers spied the Labour leader and gave him a song. To the tune of “When the Saints Go Marching In”:

“Oh Jeremy!

(Oh Jeremy!)

Is full of sh*t!

(Is full of sh*t!) 

Oh Jeremy is full of sh*t,

He’s full sh*t, sh*t and more sh*t,

Oh Jeremy is full of sh*t!”

They later gave him a rendition of “Get your policies out for the lads”. Corbyn and his vocal critics eventually made up and posed for a selfie on the platform:

What is it with Jez and eventful train journeys…

One Line Whip This Evening as Whips Bond at the Theatre

The Commons will be quieter than usual post-PMQs as MPs are on a one line whip, effectively giving them the evening off. Surely nothing to do with the joint Tory and Labour whips office trip to see This House tonight. Gavin Williamson and Nick Brown and their respective teams will be bonding at the Garrick for the play at which fashionable politicos must be seen, set in the Tory and Labour whips offices back in the seventies. The freebie includes drinks on the on stage bar, on a school night too…

Merry Christmas

Parliament is in recess, Guido’s liver needs to go into remission, the parliamentary news sausage machine has been switched off. The Dead Tree Press will be empty of news. We too will be taking a break from breaking news…

News flow will be light, we will still be uploading this and that, highlighting things that have amazed, amused and angered us and our co-conspirators. The daily Guidogram email will be as intermittent as if it was delivered by the Communications Workers Union. To all you news junkies and political obssessives, Guido’s advice is, take a break. We wish you all, a very merry Christmas…

Christmas Lunch After Party

Corbyn Uses Chilcot Report as Office Doorstop

Jeremy Corbyn issued a snub to The Canary last night by only inviting the MSM to his Christmas drinks party. The Labour leader catered for a non-veggie crowd with a spread including pork pies and chicken legs, as well as a selection of ales, lagers and wines, and his “leader’s boardroom” was decorated with Christmas lights and a tree topped with a red star. They never had this under Miliband – good to see Labour’s newfound riches from their new members being put to good use…

Guido was however most amused by Jezza’s choice of doorstop. A copy of the Chilcot report…

Expensive Lunch With Farage

Never let it be said that Guido doesn’t keep his word. His bet against Trump had to be settled. Lunch was no PFL – only a two bottler of a reasonable premier grand cru – Guido had to catch a flight and Nigel is doing Question Time tonight. In the circumstances Nige’ picked up the tab…

Public Health England Retracts Alcohol Claim After Getting Sums Wrong

phe

This morning Public Health England released its ‘alcohol evidence review’, the top line being this eye-catching statistic:

“people are drinking twice as much as they did 40 years ago”

This is the first statistic mentioned in the press release, it’s the finding Public Health England wanted to give the most prominence and feature on newspaper front pages tomorrow.[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +



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Shadow Education Secretary Angela Rayner:

“We have no plans to write off existing student debt.”

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