Ab Fab’s Patsy and Edina Speak on Brexit

Jennifer Saunders told Channel 5 “Unless the Champagne supply drys up, I don’t think they’d care.” Guido wholeheartedly agrees…

Fizz All Gone from Cam’s Champagne

cameron champagne

Selling £90 bottles of champagne signed by the PM used to be easy money for Tory fundraisers. Is it a sign of the times that local associations have cut the price of an autographed bottle in half to a bargain £45? Everything must go…

Crack Open A Bottle: Global Warming Good for Champagne

cork

Readers will be well aware that the French establishment is going to great lengths to make sure that the upcoming Paris Climate Summit is a resounding success. Cars are being banned, climate-sceptic weatherman are being sacked, and tinpot Bolivian socialists are being cosied up to with reckless abandon. It is in this climate that the champagne industry has rather sheepishly revealed that, actually, global warming has been terrific for the production of bubbly.

Pierre-Emmanuel Tattinger, director of the eponymous champagne house, had this to say about the effect of climate change on his business:

“The impact of global warming in the Champagne region is that for the last two decades we have had hardly any major frosts. We have had much larger harvests and we have had largely excellent vintages for the last 20 years. So in the Champagne region, it’s positive. Even though I think globally climate change is a top priority, as far as I’m concerned global warming is the Third World War”

Guido can understand why he closed his remarks by warning about the impending climate apocalypse. It’s a wise idea to keep Mumm in the current political climate in France…

Why has climate change been so good for bubbly? Well the Champagne region in north-eastern France has seen a 1.2 degrees centigrade increase in temperature over the past 30 years, which has handily served to decrease frost damage, thus allowing for bigger harvests. It has also added 1% to the level of alcohol and reduced it’s acidity. Yes dear reader you did read that correctly: global warming is not only giving us more champagne, it’s also making it stronger and tastier.

Even the climate nuts have conceded that climate change is helping champagne producers. Just so everyone is Cristal clear on this: global warming is good news for bubbly.



Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

Jeremy Corbyn on Big Ben Bong Ban

“… if we have to miss Big Ben in reality for a while so that work can be done, well, that’s something we have to go through. It’s not a national disaster or catastrophe.”

Sponsors

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.
Idea of Unilateral Free Trade Sent Commentariat into Spasms Idea of Unilateral Free Trade Sent Commentariat into Spasms
Sheerman Lobbying Prompts Calls for Ban Sheerman Lobbying Prompts Calls for Ban
Nasty Nat Picks on Tory MP’s Young Children Nasty Nat Picks on Tory MP’s Young Children
Remain Media Coverage Criticised By Experts Remain Media Coverage Criticised By Experts
Wings Over Scotland Arrested Wings Over Scotland Arrested
Watch and Hear: The Last Chime Watch and Hear: The Last Chime
Bonkers Bong Bowing and Reporting Bonkers Bong Bowing and Reporting
Why Transition Must Be Short Why Transition Must Be Short
PICTURES: Seumas’ Temper Tantrum PICTURES: Seumas’ Temper Tantrum
Don’t Believe ‘Victory For Hammond’ Spin Don’t Believe ‘Victory For Hammond’ Spin
Angry Adonis Wanted ‘Office for Students’ Job Angry Adonis Wanted ‘Office for Students’ Job
City Envoy Slams “Bewildering” Brussels City Envoy Slams “Bewildering” Brussels
Labour Pledged to Sell-Off Public Land Labour Pledged to Sell-Off Public Land
Corbyn’s ‘Local GPs’ Visit Staged by Labour Spin Doctor Corbyn’s ‘Local GPs’ Visit Staged by Labour Spin Doctor
Joly-Gone: Maugham Deletes Centre Party Plan Joly-Gone: Maugham Deletes Centre Party Plan
Milne: North Korea ‘Rational’ to Have Nukes Milne: North Korea ‘Rational’ to Have Nukes
LibDem Chief Exec Out LibDem Chief Exec Out
Jones Ditches Momentum For Radio Show Jones Ditches Momentum For Radio Show
Chlorine Chicken? EU Mired in Food Safety Scandals Chlorine Chicken? EU Mired in Food Safety Scandals
Juncker’s Junkets: Commissioners’ €500,000 Expenses Juncker’s Junkets: Commissioners’ €500,000 Expenses