Gizza Job Bozza (Harper Edition)

As the leadership race draws to a close (less than a week to go now) MPs have started to follow in Amber Rudd’s footsteps and more openly pitch for Cabinet jobs. The most blatant of which being Mark Harper this morning…

After his brief leadership pitch, the former Chief Whip is clearly looking to get back into the Cabinet, clearly aiming for the low hanging fruit role of Northern Ireland Secretary. Few want it and the incumbent is sure to be one of the first out the door…

Harper is also following in the video footsteps of Liz Truss who made a slightly more subtle pitch at the start of the month focusing on business. She’s now widely tipped to lead a souped up Business department. #LizForBiz

We’ll start finding out if these pitches are successful in just a week’s time…

Heywood and Robbins Blamed For “Drift” at Cabinet

After the Chequers summit the story was one of unity and consensus, with the agreement reached by the Brexit sub-committee last week holding until today’s Cabinet meeting. Yet during today’s talks senior Brexiters say there was some “drift” away from the language of the Chequers agreement, with a few “tweaks” that appear to be trying to reset the government’s approach towards convergence with the EU. The James Forsyth App reports that an idea was proposed to make a “binding agreement” to align with EU rules and regulations in certain sectors. David Davis, for the second time in a week, was “the hero of the hour” in fighting back against the suggestion. Where did this new alignment idea come from? Those in the room detect the hand of Jeremy Heywood and Olly Robbins, May’s troublesome civil servants, trying to move the Cabinet away from the agreed position. A Cabinet source says: “It seems to be incessant tinkering and manipulation by the Cabinet Secretary and his minions when everything should be focussed on what the Cabinet agreed at Chequers”. We will see when May speaks tomorrow whether Heywood and Robbins were successful…

Hammond: We Don’t Know What We Want From Brexit End State

Philip Hammond has confirmed to the Treasury select committee that the Cabinet still hasn’t discussed what the Brexit end state will look like, i.e. whether it will be the convergence non-Brexit preferred by him, Jeremy Heywood and Olly Robbins, or a real Brexit in which we properly diverge from the EU. It has been 18 months since the referendum, it’s mad the Cabinet has not even discussed what Brexit Britain will look like. If the government has no idea on the end state, are they even ready to move onto the next stage of talks?

All Smiles After Cabinet

Boris and Hammond clearly made to walk out together from this morning’s two and a half hour Cabinet as some show of unity. “Is he your new best friend?” heckles the BBC’s Chris Mason…

Cabinet Brexit Split: Where They Stand

All explained here

First Picture of May’s Cabinet

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Click to enlarge

First Picture of new Cabinet

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How Grant Shapps Could Be Back in Cabinet in Just 3 Easy Steps

So, you’ve been demoted from your Cabinet-attending role as Tory party chairman to a lowly junior ministerial role at DfiD. Do not fear! Here is your how-to guide to getting back round the Cabinet table in just three easy steps:

Step One

The government’s decision on airport expansion is a step closer post-election. The LibDems – most importantly Vince Cable – are out and Boris has been given a role where he would not have to resign if the Tory government backs Heathrow. A decision could be made in the next few months…

Step Two

One person who would surely have to honourably fall on her sword if the government chooses Heathrow is Justine Greening. As MP for Putney, opposing a third runway was her main local campaign for re-election. As she says on her website, “Justine has led our community’s campaign against extra aircraft noise from an expanded Heathrow… Justine will continue to stand up for the thousands of residents who are concerned about aircraft noise”. Could she realistically vote for a Heathrow third runway?

Step Three

Who is the junior minister at DfiD who could step up to fill the vacant Secretary of State position in an emergency? Ah yes, the minister of state, one Grant Shapps.

Barring any brewing personal scandal that might slight his good character, there is a route back to the Cabinet table…

Cabinet Filmed For the First Time

Unprecedented footage as Dave lets the cameras into Number 10 to film Cabinet for the first time…

And here they all are…

Cabinet Drown Sorrows

Or are they celebrating?

Gove Shows the World THAT Watch

The famous cabinet disrupting musical watch has finally been shown to the world…

Yellow on Yellow: Cable Cabinet Clash


It has been widely reported today that Danny Alexander and Vince Cable are barely on speaking terms, with the Mail this moring added that the tension boiled over last Tuesday at Cabinet. Guido hears that Vince was giving a presentation on SMEs when Grant Shapps and Oliver Letwin turned on the Business Secretary, suggesting that  while the government is ‘bureaucracy busting’ Cable is ‘doing the opposite at BIS’ and ‘creating new red tape’. Much to the surprise of everyone, not least Vince, Alexander then weighed in on the attack, agreeing that Cable should be doing more to tackle red tape. Guido’s eyes and ears in the room say Uncle Fester got incredibly defensive and looked even more miffed than usual by the end. No wonder he’s grumpy this week. 

Wormtongue Speaks

Sir Jeremy Heywood has rather intriguingly penned a piece for today’s Indy, stepping into the public eye to plug his ‘crusade’ for open government. As ever Wormtongue was at his disconcerting best:

“For as many years as Britain has had a centralised civil service we have been rather good at collecting information. From the first censuses in 1801 to the creation of the Central Statistical Office by Winston Churchill, the amount of information gathered and held by Government has exponentially increased as our society has become more complex. Today we hold  raw information on everything from pupil performance by class, crime levels on every street in the country and the success rate for every single operation in your local hospital. We can even tell at the touch of a button how late your train into work is likely to be.”

Big Brother is watching you…

Family Breakdown Rocks Cabinet

Millionaire Cabinet Secretary Caroline Spelman spent a year’s salary on a botched injunction the last time her son went off the rails, but ‘roid-popping Jonny’s latest embarrassment has been laid bare for all to see. The disgraced England rugby prodigy posted a video online claiming the Environment Secretary is kicking him out of the family home, then begs for money to support his new chosen career: body-building.[…] Read the rest

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Dickensian Dave

The workhouse is not coming back just yet, but what larks at Cabinet this morning as Jeremy Hunt gave out copies of Dickens’ classics to each Secretary of State.

The choices were apparently based on their character:

  • David Cameron – Great Expectations & Hard Times
  • Nick Clegg – Oliver Twist
  • William Hague – The Uncommercial Traveller
  • Andrew Mitchell – Dombey and Son
  • George Osborne – A Tale of Two Cities
  • Danny Alexander – Hard Times
  • Kenneth Clarke – Little Dorrit
  • Theresa May – Little Dorrit
  • Justine Greening – Dombey and Son
  • Philip Hammond – Dombey and Son
  • Vince Cable – A Christmas Carol
  • David Willetts – The Haunted Man and Ghost’s Bargain
  • Iain Duncan Smith – Oliver Twist
  • Ed Davey – Little Dorrit
  • Andrew Lansley – Nicholas Nickleby
  • Michael Gove – A Child’s History of England
  • Eric Pickles – A House to Let
  • Caroline Spelman – Bleak House
  • Owen Paterson – Pickwick Papers
  • Michael Moore – Pickwick Papers
  • Cheryl Gillan – Pickwick Papers
  • Baroness Warsi – The Old Curiosity Shop
  • Francis Maude – The Old Curiosity Shop
  • Oliver Letwin – The Old Curiosity Shop
  • Lord Strathclyde – Bleak House
  • Sir George Young – Bleak House

Lansley left early and paused for the cameras.[…] Read the rest

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Huhne Reshuffle Mischief

The smart money is on Cameron not reshuffling until after the Olympics and opting for a quick yellow for yellow swap if Huhne is forced out, but that hasn’t stopped some intriguing ideas being floated around Tory circles. Firstly there was the hilarious “bigging up” of Sarah Teather, whose civil servants give a very different picture from the one painted in Black Dog:

“Small but perfectly formed Lib Dem Schools Minister Sarah Teather is being tipped by friends of Michael Gove to succeed Chris Huhne as Energy Secretary if he is forced to quit over his speeding offence wrangle.

[…] Read the rest

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BIS Officials Bite At Vince's Briefing

Vince Cable has taken to the pages of the FT to brief against Thresesa May and Iain Duncan Smith:

An ally of Mr Cable said: “Vince really wants to come forward with a good package for business this autumn but we want to see other departments putting their weight behind these efforts.

[…] Read the rest

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+ + + Jeremy Heywood Confirmed as Next Cabinet Secretary + + +


CV:

  • The fifty year old Oxford and LSE graduate has worked for Chancellors Lamont, Clarke and Brown.
  • Became Blair’s Principal Private Secretary in 1999.
  • Spent 2003 to 2007 at Morgan Stanley
  • Returned to the Cabinet Office in 2007 in a strategy role for Gordon.
[…] Read the rest

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BREAKING: GOD to Quit, Job Split

It was well known that Cabinet Sectary Gus O’Donnell was on his way out, and rumours were afoot that there was some consternation about appropriate candidates to fill his boots. Well it seems the plan is to split up his job instead:

Jeremy Heywood is in the line for the newly defined Cabinet Secretary role, but was expected to get the whole thing.[…] Read the rest

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Mini-Reshuffle Runners and Riders

As reported yesterday, Downing Street have signed off the plans for a mini-shuffle should the CPS press the big-red Huhne button. All talk of the one time leader in waiting being able to cling on, despite a charge, has withered away, even amongst his most loyal Praetorians online.[…] Read the rest

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