Readers who managed to pick up a copy of the Daily Guido on April Fool’s will have seen our sports leader on why Norwich City (chairman one Ed Balls) would likely stay in the Premier League this season. Much like in the General Election, the performance of a Balls-headed enterprise was significantly overestimated…

Norwich have been relegated from the Premier League. Despite having the sixth largest spend in the January transfer window, the former shadow chancellor’s team will go back down to the Championship. They spent the boom, and they’ve gone bust…

Listening to the BBC or reading left-wing newspapers and blogs would lead you to think we were about to suffer shock-doctrine economics at the hands of the Coalition requiring martial law to enforce.  The fact is that at the end of this parliament government spending will be up another 9%.

The public sector is merely looking at below inflation spending increases, but increases nevertheless. There are not going to be across the board spending cuts, there is going to be a re-prioritisation of resources, with slower overall spending growth. George Osborne is no Pinochet…

Incidentally it could be worse, in Obama’s United Soviets of America the White House is planning (Brown-style) to maintain 10% deficit financing next year. Within a generation the White House itself is predicting a 25% deficit. Which means Greek style bankruptcy…

On the Marr show Gordon raged against the moral bankruptcy of Goldman Sachs; “I want a special investigation done into what has happened at Goldman Sachs.”

Perhaps he could ask Gavyn Davies to investigate? For many years he has been advised by Gavyn Davies, who made some £150 million during his period as a Goldman Sachs partner.

It was Davies who last year urged Gordon to implement Mugabenomics, turn on the printing presses and call it quantitative easing. Davies has been a big donor to the Labour Party and a long-term supporter. Davies’ wife Sue Nye was Gordon’s private secretary in Downing Street and they are known to be good friends. Perhaps it was they who stole Gordon’s moral compass.

UPDATE : The more Guido thinks about this, the more he likes Gordon’s idea. Questions Guido would like the Goldman Sachs special investigator to get answered:

• Exactly how many boardroom lunches and suchlike did Gordon Brown have with Goldman Sachs figures?
• During the many lunches Gordon had with Goldman Sachs did he discuss policy or matters which they were able to exploit to their advantage in the markets?
• Goldmans were known to be major sellers of gold before Brown announced his extraordinarily ill-conceived plan to sell the Bank of England’s gold reserves.
• Gavyn Davies was an adviser to Gordon Brown during this period.  Did he recommend, advise on or know anything of the intended gold sales policy?  Did Sue Nye know of the intention to sell gold?

These are not matters of little import, Gordon’s gold sales debacle cost the Treasury £6 billion, the amount that Gordon claims will devastate the economy if the Tories cut it from public spending. The bank is known at rival firms as ‘Government Sachs’ because senior partners keep so close to governments and in particular finance ministries…

Following the longest recession in history Britain posted its first-ever budget deficit for the month of January.  Usually January is a bumper month for tax receipts.  Unfunded government over-spending was £4.3 billion, when consensus economists were forecasting a £2.6 billion surplus, according to the median of 16 forecasts in a Bloomberg News survey.

Don’t rule out a double-dip recession.  With neither the Conservatives or Labour offering policies to kick-start consumer spending and GDP growth, we could be in a lot of trouble…

So have you stocked up on beans or gold yet?  Have you taken Guido’s advice?

The Governor of the Bank of England now has to write an open letter to the Chancellor. This is Mervyn King’s sixth such letter in seven years.  Perhaps he will recommend stocking up on commodities.  Don’t forget we have a serious chance of a double-dip recession on the horizon.  And still we have no pro-growth policies from the government, only over-spending and over-borrowing…