Davis: Brake Leaked His Own Letter

Last night Tom Brake complained to Bercow that he suspects DExEU leaked to this website a letter he wrote to David Davis. It’s clearly hurting Brake as he brought it up in the Commons again at DExEU questions this afternoon. DD comprehensively slapped him down, replying that the first DExEU heard about the letter was when a journalist called them up asking for comment. In other words, Brake leaked his own letter to the press first. A row entirely concocted by Brake, who is not only wasting everyone’s time to serve his own bitterness but also misleading the House…

Boris on Labour: “You Supine Protoplasmic Invertebrate Jellies!”

A repeat but the old ones are the best…

Brake Misleads Bercow About Guido Story

Tom Brake has gone crying to Bercow after his letter to David Davis last week was published by Guido. In a point of order yesterday Brake whinged:

On Friday I emailed the Secretary of State for Exiting the European Union’s office at eight minutes past 12. It was acknowledged by his office at 21 minutes past 12, and by 15.03 precisely my letter was on Guido Fawkes’s website.”

Except there is one embarrassing bit of information that Brake didn’t tell Mr Speaker. The first DExEU heard of his letter was when newspapers started calling them up for comment. Which means Brake leaked his own letter to the press first. Bercow might be no fan of Guido, but he won’t take kindly to being misled by Brake either…

About “Corbyn’s Best PMQs”…

It only took one of the most disastrous weeks for a Prime Minister in modern British political history to spur Jeremy Corbyn into a barely half-competent PMQs performance. If Jez can install a hard-leftist as May’s ENT specialist, block book the nation’s comic hecklers, get a Momentum plant in a Velcro factory and arrange for Tory conference to be held weekly he’ll be really flying.

Until then pundits are at risk of overstating Jezza’s new-found ‘proficiency’, which entirely consisted in just about managing to ask all of questions on the same half-tricky topic in the right order. Farcically, he still can’t go on Brexit…

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“Whoops”

Not sure it was rage, more carelessness judging by the “whoops” and smirk from the PM…

PMQs: Who’s Asking the Questions?


Q1 Ian Mearns (Gateshead) If she will list her official engagements for Wednesday 11 October.

Q2 Robert Neill (Bromley and Chislehurst)

03 Heidi Allen (South Cambridgeshire)

QR Lloyd Russell-Moyle (Brighton, Kemptown)

QS Ms Karen Buck (Westminster North)

Q6 Gareth Snell (Stoke-on-Trent Central)

Q7 Mark Menzies (Fylde)

Q8 Heidi Alexander (Lewisham East)

Q9 Kerry McCarthy (Bristol East)

Q10 Alistair Carmichael (Orkney and Shetland)

Q11 Chris Elmore (Ogmore)

Q12 Jim McMahon (Oldham West and Royton)

Q13 David T. C. Davies (Monmouth)

Q14 Vicky Foxcroft (Lewisham, Deptford)

Q15 Hywel Williams (Arfon)

Comments in the comments…

PMQs Sketch: First Dates

PMQs: every Wednesday lunchtime it feels like watching an action replay of the worst first date you have ever been on in your life. Like a cocky sixth-former with horrendously bad chat, Jez always over-plans his opening gambit: this time it was disability rights. Hapless and out of fashion, his first lines hit so far off base that they force May to rely on stock phrases she had mentally planned out for different scenarios. Like an under-confident teenage girl trying to recall what she said to herself in the mirror the night before, May hesitates before every response. Will they ever get anywhere near the hot verbal intercourse we all crave?

The main course seldom goes better. Jez’s material was again worthy and stale; he overcooked public sector pay with statistics. Meanwhile, the bloody difficult date sat opposite might as well have been in a different restaurant. May is a clock-watching woman, she has no desire to be there: the kind of girl who might just vanish from the table while you’ve gone to the gents. This week, the last PMQs before conferences, it was especially clear she could not wait to get the taxi home. She regards every question as an attempt to dishonour her, yet she is dealing with a man who essentially cannot perform. It is painful to watch her act so defensively against Jez who, when it comes to debate, cannot keep it up…

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PMQs: Who’s Asking the Questions?

Q1 Layla Moran (Oxford West and Abingdon) If she will list her official engagements for Wednesday 13 September.

Q2 Philip Davies (Shipley)

Q3 Melanie Onn (Great Grimsby)

Q4 Edward Argar (Charnwood)

Q5 James Heappey (Wells)

Q6 Louise Haigh (Sheffield, Heeley)

Q7 Hannah Bardell (Livingston)

Q8 Michael Fabricant (Lichfield) When she next plans to meet the Mayor of the West Midlands to discuss the economy of that region; and if she will make a statement.

Q9 Mrs Emma Lewell-Buck (South Shields)

Q10 Daniel Zeichner (Cambridge)

Q11 Kirsty Blackman (Aberdeen North)

Q12 Jamie Stone (Caithness, Sutherland and Easter Ross)

Q13 Jonathan Edwards (Carmarthen East and Dinefwr)

Q14 Norman Lamb (North Norfolk)

Q15 David Morris (Morecambe and Lunesdale)

Comments in the comments…

Guido’s Labour Brexit Explainer As Seen in the Commons

Conor Burns borrowed from Guido’s handy explanation of Labour’s Brexit mess during his Commons speech last night. Glad we were able to help clear it up for them…

MPs Who Voted to Block Brexit in Full

These are the MPs who voted against the European Union (Withdrawal) Bill at Second Reading:

Ms Diane Abbott (Labour – Hackney North and Stoke Newington)
Debbie Abrahams (Labour – Oldham East and Saddleworth)
Heidi Alexander (Labour – Lewisham East)
Rushanara Ali (Labour – Bethnal Green and Bow)
Dr Rosena Allin-Khan (Labour – Tooting)
Mike Amesbury (Labour – Weaver Vale)
Tonia Antoniazzi (Labour – Gower)
Jonathan Ashworth (Labour (Co-op) – Leicester South)
Mr Adrian Bailey (Labour (Co-op) – West Bromwich West)
Hannah Bardell (Scottish National Party – Livingston)
Margaret Beckett (Labour – Derby South)
Hilary Benn (Labour – Leeds Central)
Luciana Berger (Labour (Co-op) – Liverpool, Wavertree)
Mr Clive Betts (Labour – Sheffield South East)
Ian Blackford (Scottish National Party – Ross, Skye and Lochaber)
Kirsty Blackman (Scottish National Party – Aberdeen North)
Dr Roberta Blackman-Woods (Labour – City of Durham)
Paul Blomfield (Labour – Sheffield Central)
Tracy Brabin (Labour (Co-op) – Batley and Spen)
Mr Ben Bradshaw (Labour – Exeter)
Tom Brake (Liberal Democrat – Carshalton and Wallington)
Kevin Brennan (Labour – Cardiff West)
Deidre Brock (Scottish National Party – Edinburgh North and Leith)
Alan Brown (Scottish National Party – Kilmarnock and Loudoun)
Lyn Brown (Labour – West Ham)
Mr Nicholas Brown (Labour – Newcastle upon Tyne East)
Chris Bryant (Labour – Rhondda)
Ms Karen Buck (Labour – Westminster North)
Richard Burden (Labour – Birmingham, Northfield)
Richard Burgon (Labour – Leeds East)
Dawn Butler (Labour – Brent Central)
Liam Byrne (Labour – Birmingham, Hodge Hill)
Sir Vince Cable (Liberal Democrat – Twickenham)
Ruth Cadbury (Labour – Brentford and Isleworth)
Dr Lisa Cameron (Scottish National Party – East Kilbride)
Mr Alan Campbell (Labour – Tynemouth)
Dan Carden (Labour – Liverpool, Walton)
Mr Alistair Carmichael (Liberal Democrat – Orkney and Shetland)
Sarah Champion (Labour – Rotherham)
Douglas Chapman (Scottish National Party – Dunfermline and West Fife)
Jenny Chapman (Labour – Darlington)
Bambos Charalambous (Labour – Enfield, Southgate)
Joanna Cherry (Scottish National Party – Edinburgh South West)
Ann Clwyd (Labour – Cynon Valley)
Vernon Coaker (Labour – Gedling)
Ann Coffey (Labour – Stockport)
Julie Cooper (Labour – Burnley)
Rosie Cooper (Labour – West Lancashire)
Yvette Cooper (Labour – Normanton, Pontefract and Castleford)
Jeremy Corbyn (Labour – Islington North)
Ronnie Cowan (Scottish National Party – Inverclyde)
Neil Coyle (Labour – Bermondsey and Old Southwark)
Angela Crawley (Scottish National Party – Lanark and Hamilton East)
Mary Creagh (Labour – Wakefield)
Stella Creasy (Labour (Co-op) – Walthamstow)
Jon Cruddas (Labour – Dagenham and Rainham)
John Cryer (Labour – Leyton and Wanstead)
Judith Cummins (Labour – Bradford South)
Alex Cunningham (Labour – Stockton North)
Mr Jim Cunningham (Labour – Coventry South)
Sir Edward Davey (Liberal Democrat – Kingston and Surbiton)
Wayne David (Labour – Caerphilly)
Geraint Davies (Labour (Co-op) – Swansea West)
Martyn Day (Scottish National Party – Linlithgow and East Falkirk)
Marsha De Cordova (Labour – Battersea)
Gloria De Piero (Labour – Ashfield)
Thangam Debbonaire (Labour – Bristol West)
Emma Dent Coad (Labour – Kensington)
Mr Tanmanjeet Singh Dhesi (Labour – Slough)
Martin Docherty-Hughes (Scottish National Party – West Dunbartonshire)
Anneliese Dodds (Labour (Co-op) – Oxford East)
Stephen Doughty (Labour (Co-op) – Cardiff South and Penarth)
Peter Dowd (Labour – Bootle)
Dr David Drew (Labour (Co-op) – Stroud)
Jack Dromey (Labour – Birmingham, Erdington)
Rosie Duffield (Labour – Canterbury)
Maria Eagle (Labour – Garston and Halewood)
Ms Angela Eagle (Labour – Wallasey)
Jonathan Edwards (Plaid Cymru – Carmarthen East and Dinefwr)
Clive Efford (Labour – Eltham)
Julie Elliott (Labour – Sunderland Central)
Mrs Louise Ellman (Labour (Co-op) – Liverpool, Riverside)
Chris Elmore (Labour – Ogmore)
Bill Esterson (Labour – Sefton Central)
Chris Evans (Labour (Co-op) – Islwyn)
Paul Farrelly (Labour – Newcastle-under-Lyme)
Tim Farron (Liberal Democrat – Westmorland and Lonsdale)
Marion Fellows (Scottish National Party – Motherwell and Wishaw)
Jim Fitzpatrick (Labour – Poplar and Limehouse)
Colleen Fletcher (Labour – Coventry North East)
Paul Flynn (Labour – Newport West)
James Frith (Labour – Bury North)
Gill Furniss (Labour – Sheffield, Brightside and Hillsborough)
Hugh Gaffney (Labour – Coatbridge, Chryston and Bellshill)
Mike Gapes (Labour (Co-op) – Ilford South)
Barry Gardiner (Labour – Brent North)
Ruth George (Labour – High Peak)
Stephen Gethins (Scottish National Party – North East Fife)
Patricia Gibson (Scottish National Party – North Ayrshire and Arran)
Preet Kaur Gill (Labour (Co-op) – Birmingham, Edgbaston)
Mary Glindon (Labour – North Tyneside)
Mr Roger Godsiff (Labour – Birmingham, Hall Green)
Helen Goodman (Labour – Bishop Auckland)
Patrick Grady (Scottish National Party – Glasgow North)
Peter Grant (Scottish National Party – Glenrothes)
Neil Gray (Scottish National Party – Airdrie and Shotts)
Kate Green (Labour – Stretford and Urmston)
Lilian Greenwood (Labour – Nottingham South)
Margaret Greenwood (Labour – Wirral West)
Nia Griffith (Labour – Llanelli)
John Grogan (Labour – Keighley)
Andrew Gwynne (Labour – Denton and Reddish)
Louise Haigh (Labour – Sheffield, Heeley)
Fabian Hamilton (Labour – Leeds North East)
Emma Hardy (Labour – Kingston upon Hull West and Hessle)
Ms Harriet Harman (Labour – Camberwell and Peckham)
Carolyn Harris (Labour – Swansea East)
Helen Hayes (Labour – Dulwich and West Norwood)
Sue Hayman (Labour – Workington)
John Healey (Labour – Wentworth and Dearne)
Mr Mark Hendrick (Labour (Co-op) – Preston)
Drew Hendry (Scottish National Party – Inverness, Nairn, Badenoch and Strathspey)
Mr Stephen Hepburn (Labour – Jarrow)
Lady Hermon (Independent – North Down)
Mike Hill (Labour – Hartlepool)
Meg Hillier (Labour (Co-op) – Hackney South and Shoreditch)
Wera Hobhouse (Liberal Democrat – Bath)
Dame Margaret Hodge (Labour – Barking)
Mrs Sharon Hodgson (Labour – Washington and Sunderland West)
Kate Hollern (Labour – Blackburn)
Stewart Hosie (Scottish National Party – Dundee East)
Mr George Howarth (Labour – Knowsley)
Dr Rupa Huq (Labour – Ealing Central and Acton)
Imran Hussain (Labour – Bradford East)
Christine Jardine (Liberal Democrat – Edinburgh West)
Dan Jarvis (Labour – Barnsley Central)
Diana Johnson (Labour – Kingston upon Hull North)
Darren Jones (Labour – Bristol North West)
Gerald Jones (Labour – Merthyr Tydfil and Rhymney)
Graham P Jones (Labour – Hyndburn)
Sarah Jones (Labour – Croydon Central)
Susan Elan Jones (Labour – Clwyd South)
Mike Kane (Labour – Wythenshawe and Sale East)
Barbara Keeley (Labour – Worsley and Eccles South)
Liz Kendall (Labour – Leicester West)
Afzal Khan (Labour – Manchester, Gorton)
Stephen Kinnock (Labour – Aberavon)
Peter Kyle (Labour – Hove)
Lesley Laird (Labour – Kirkcaldy and Cowdenbeath)
Ben Lake (Plaid Cymru – Ceredigion)
Norman Lamb (Liberal Democrat – North Norfolk)
Mr David Lammy (Labour – Tottenham)
Ian Lavery (Labour – Wansbeck)
Chris Law (Scottish National Party – Dundee West)
Ms Karen Lee (Labour – Lincoln)
Mr Chris Leslie (Labour (Co-op) – Nottingham East)
Mrs Emma Lewell-Buck (Labour – South Shields)
Clive Lewis (Labour – Norwich South)
Mr Ivan Lewis (Labour – Bury South)
David Linden (Scottish National Party – Glasgow East)
Stephen Lloyd (Liberal Democrat – Eastbourne)
Tony Lloyd (Labour – Rochdale)
Rebecca Long Bailey (Labour – Salford and Eccles)
Caroline Lucas (Green Party – Brighton, Pavilion)
Ian C. Lucas (Labour – Wrexham)
Holly Lynch (Labour – Halifax)
Angus Brendan MacNeil (Scottish National Party – Na h-Eileanan an Iar)
Justin Madders (Labour – Ellesmere Port and Neston)
Mr Khalid Mahmood (Labour – Birmingham, Perry Barr)
Shabana Mahmood (Labour – Birmingham, Ladywood)
Seema Malhotra (Labour (Co-op) – Feltham and Heston)
Gordon Marsden (Labour – Blackpool South)
Sandy Martin (Labour – Ipswich)
Rachael Maskell (Labour (Co-op) – York Central)
Christian Matheson (Labour – City of Chester)
Steve McCabe (Labour – Birmingham, Selly Oak)
Kerry McCarthy (Labour – Bristol East)
Siobhain McDonagh (Labour – Mitcham and Morden)
Andy McDonald (Labour – Middlesbrough)
Stewart Malcolm McDonald (Scottish National Party – Glasgow South)
Stuart C. McDonald (Scottish National Party – Cumbernauld)
John McDonnell (Labour – Hayes and Harlington)
Mr Pat McFadden (Labour – Wolverhampton South East)
Conor McGinn (Labour – St Helens North)
Alison McGovern (Labour – Wirral South)
Liz McInnes (Labour – Heywood and Middleton)
Catherine McKinnell (Labour – Newcastle upon Tyne North)
Jim McMahon (Labour (Co-op) – Oldham West and Royton)
Anna McMorrin (Labour – Cardiff North)
John McNally (Scottish National Party – Falkirk)
Ian Mearns (Labour – Gateshead)
Edward Miliband (Labour – Doncaster North)
Carol Monaghan (Scottish National Party – Glasgow North West)
Layla Moran (Liberal Democrat – Oxford West and Abingdon)
Jessica Morden (Labour – Newport East)
Stephen Morgan (Labour – Portsmouth South)
Grahame Morris (Labour – Easington)
Ian Murray (Labour – Edinburgh South)
Lisa Nandy (Labour – Wigan)
Gavin Newlands (Scottish National Party – Paisley and Renfrewshire North)
Alex Norris (Labour (Co-op) – Nottingham North)
Brendan O’Hara (Scottish National Party – Argyll and Bute)
Jared O’Mara (Labour – Sheffield, Hallam)
Fiona Onasanya (Labour – Peterborough)
Melanie Onn (Labour – Great Grimsby)
Chi Onwurah (Labour – Newcastle upon Tyne Central)
Kate Osamor (Labour (Co-op) – Edmonton)
Albert Owen (Labour – Ynys Môn)
Stephanie Peacock (Labour – Barnsley East)
Teresa Pearce (Labour – Erith and Thamesmead)
Matthew Pennycook (Labour – Greenwich and Woolwich)
Toby Perkins (Labour – Chesterfield)
Jess Phillips (Labour – Birmingham, Yardley)
Bridget Phillipson (Labour – Houghton and Sunderland South)
Laura Pidcock (Labour – North West Durham)
Jo Platt (Labour (Co-op) – Leigh)
Luke Pollard (Labour (Co-op) – Plymouth, Sutton and Devonport)
Stephen Pound (Labour – Ealing North)
Lucy Powell (Labour (Co-op) – Manchester Central)
Yasmin Qureshi (Labour – Bolton South East)
Faisal Rashid (Labour – Warrington South)
Angela Rayner (Labour – Ashton-under-Lyne)
Mr Steve Reed (Labour (Co-op) – Croydon North)
Christina Rees (Labour (Co-op) – Neath)
Ellie Reeves (Labour – Lewisham West and Penge)
Rachel Reeves (Labour – Leeds West)
Emma Reynolds (Labour – Wolverhampton North East)
Jonathan Reynolds (Labour (Co-op) – Stalybridge and Hyde)
Ms Marie Rimmer (Labour – St Helens South and Whiston)
Mr Geoffrey Robinson (Labour – Coventry North West)
Matt Rodda (Labour – Reading East)
Danielle Rowley (Labour – Midlothian)
Chris Ruane (Labour – Vale of Clwyd)
Lloyd Russell-Moyle (Labour (Co-op) – Brighton, Kemptown)
Joan Ryan (Labour – Enfield North)
Liz Saville Roberts (Plaid Cymru – Dwyfor Meirionnydd)
Naz Shah (Labour – Bradford West)
Mr Virendra Sharma (Labour – Ealing, Southall)
Mr Barry Sheerman (Labour (Co-op) – Huddersfield)
Tommy Sheppard (Scottish National Party – Edinburgh East)
Paula Sherriff (Labour – Dewsbury)
Mr Gavin Shuker (Labour (Co-op) – Luton South)
Tulip Siddiq (Labour – Hampstead and Kilburn)
Andy Slaughter (Labour – Hammersmith)
Ruth Smeeth (Labour – Stoke-on-Trent North)
Angela Smith (Labour – Penistone and Stocksbridge)
Cat Smith (Labour – Lancaster and Fleetwood)
Eleanor Smith (Labour – Wolverhampton South West)
Jeff Smith (Labour – Manchester, Withington)
Laura Smith (Labour – Crewe and Nantwich)
Nick Smith (Labour – Blaenau Gwent)
Owen Smith (Labour – Pontypridd)
Karin Smyth (Labour – Bristol South)
Gareth Snell (Labour (Co-op) – Stoke-on-Trent Central)
Alex Sobel (Labour (Co-op) – Leeds North West)
Keir Starmer (Labour – Holborn and St Pancras)
Chris Stephens (Scottish National Party – Glasgow South West)
Jo Stevens (Labour – Cardiff Central)
Jamie Stone (Liberal Democrat – Caithness, Sutherland and Easter Ross)
Wes Streeting (Labour – Ilford North)
Mr Paul J Sweeney (Labour (Co-op) – Glasgow North East)
Jo Swinson (Liberal Democrat – East Dunbartonshire)
Mark Tami (Labour – Alyn and Deeside)
Alison Thewliss (Scottish National Party – Glasgow Central)
Gareth Thomas (Labour (Co-op) – Harrow West)
Nick Thomas-Symonds (Labour – Torfaen)
Emily Thornberry (Labour – Islington South and Finsbury)
Stephen Timms (Labour – East Ham)
Jon Trickett (Labour – Hemsworth)
Karl Turner (Labour – Kingston upon Hull East)
Stephen Twigg (Labour (Co-op) – Liverpool, West Derby)
Liz Twist (Labour – Blaydon)
Chuka Umunna (Labour – Streatham)
Keith Vaz (Labour – Leicester East)
Valerie Vaz (Labour – Walsall South)
Thelma Walker (Labour – Colne Valley)
Tom Watson (Labour – West Bromwich East)
Catherine West (Labour – Hornsey and Wood Green)
Matt Western (Labour – Warwick and Leamington)
Dr Alan Whitehead (Labour – Southampton, Test)
Martin Whitfield (Labour – East Lothian)
Dr Philippa Whitford (Scottish National Party – Central Ayrshire)
Dr Paul Williams (Labour – Stockton South)
Hywel Williams (Plaid Cymru – Arfon)
Chris Williamson (Labour – Derby North)
Phil Wilson (Labour – Sedgefield)
Pete Wishart (Scottish National Party – Perth and North Perthshire)
John Woodcock (Labour (Co-op) – Barrow and Furness)
Mohammad Yasin (Labour – Bedford)
Daniel Zeichner (Labour – Cambridge)

238 Labour MPs, 34 SNP, 12 LibDems, 4 Plaid, Lady Hermon and Caroline Lucas… Zero Tories…

Brexit Bill Passes Second Reading 326-290

Majority of 36, comfortable…

McPMQs

What do a McDonald’s worker and Jeremy Corbyn have in common? Two E’s at A-Level. But more than that, in fact: as the hot potatoes of Brexit and immigration policy sizzled unattended in the frying pan of politics, Jez chose to begin PMQs with an ardent defence of Britain’s burger flippers. Why?

Because Jeremy Corbyn feels a natural affinity with the fast food operative; he is no less than the patron saint of sausage shufflers. Jez is deeply aware that nothing more should have become of him in this life, he should have been that unwillingly-uniformed delinquent stood behind the McDonald’s counter, red-hatted and forever destined to fill paper cartons full of soggy fries. In fact, Jez single-handedly undermines the message of McStrike. Jeremy Corbyn is exactly what happens when you pay a McDonald’s one-star worker more than £100,000 a year: you get a woefully over-promoted half-wit unable to correctly follow orders, their salary entirely out of step with their abilities and performance. Then again Vegan Jez wouldn’t fit in at McDonald’s…

Tom Watson would be on the burger station, wouldn’t he? Slipping one out of every two beef patties slyly into his capacious gob, chucking the odd one into the mouth of Emily Thornberry, poised on the other side of the grill. It’d be like feeding one of those plastic bins made to look like an animal. Don’t put Laura Pidcock on the tills for God’s sake; she won’t talk to any of the customers. Come to think of it, could any of these jokers make an even half-arsed attempt at running an average fast food outlet? Extrapolate further and you see the whole thing is little more than McPMQs: the same old diet of junk is still constantly served up, the quality improves not a bit. At least a McDonald’s is over quickly…

And like turning a burger, Jez flips from the private to public sector: for him they are two sides of the same steak, both equally deserving to be thrown on the fire. “Warm words don’t pay food bills. Pay rises will help to do that. She must end the pay cap.” Almost immediately, the PM drops the entire dinner on the floor, saying he wants “money for this, that and the other”. Like a group of hoodlums gathered at midnight in the upstairs of a Maccy D’s in the rough part of town, Labour MPs whooped and hollered. She was doing passably well, but as usual impaled herself with one of her own attack lines, coming out like a kebab on a skewer.

No mention of Jacob Rees-Mogg; well, you wouldn’t catch him dead under the Golden Arches. The only actual news to come out of PMQs was a plea for an ancient driving law to be changed. It’s the first PMQs of the new parliamentary year, and that’s the top line. It’s almost like “nothing has changed”: every week, the menu is entirely the same, and, just like a McDonald’s, it literally ends up down the toilet…

Crispin Blunt’s Fall From Grace

Select committee chairmen are supposed to serve a five year term following their election at the beginning of a parliament. Not Crispin Blunt, who had his time as Foreign Affairs committee chair cut short by the snap election. Blunt was booted out in July after just two years – colleagues were unimpressed with his multiple gaffes and almost Corbynista foreign policy tendencies. As if that were not humiliating enough, the supremely entitled Crispin then put his name forward for a place on the committee, attempting to hang around like a bad smell. Yesterday he lost that election too. Has he got the picture yet? 

PMQs: Who’s Asking the Questions?

Oral Questions to the Prime Minister

Q1 Anna Soubry (Broxtowe)

Q2 Mr Mark Harper (Forest of Dean)

Q3 Richard Benyon (Newbury)

Q4 Helen Whately (Faversham and Mid Kent)

Q5 Mr John Baron (Basildon and Billericay)

Q6 David Duguid (Banff and Buchan)

Q7 Chris Philp (Croydon South)

Q8 Will Quince (Colchester)

Q9 Heidi Alexander (Lewisham East)

Q10 Mims Davies (Eastleigh)

Q11 Michelle Donelan (Chippenham)

Q12 Tim Loughton (East Worthing and Shoreham)

Q13 Ruth Smeeth (Stoke-on-Trent North)

Q14 Matt Warman (Boston and Skegness)

Q15 Luciana Berger (Liverpool, Wavertree)

Comments in the comments…

Select Committee Election Results

TREASURY (4 places)

Charlie Elphicke
Stephen Hammond
Alister Jack
Kit Malthouse

DEFENCE (3 places)

Leo Docherty
Mark Francois
Johnny Mercer

FOREIGN AFFAIRS (4 places)

Nusrat Ghani
Andrew Rosindell
Royston Smith
Nadhim Zahawi

COMMUNITIES AND LOCAL GOVERNMENT (5 places)

Bob Blackman
Kevin Hollinrake
Andrew Lewer
Mark Prisk
Mary Robinson

DIGITAL, CULTURE, MEDIA AND SPORT (4 places)

Simon Hart
Julian Knight
Rebecca Pow
Giles Watling

EDUCATION (4 places)

Lucy Allan
Michelle Donelan
Trudy Harrison
William Wragg

ENVIRONMENT, FOOD AND RURAL AFFAIRS (3 places)

Dr Caroline Johnson
Sheryll Murray
Julian Sturdy

INTERNATIONAL DEVELOPMENT (5 places)

James Duddridge
Nigel Evans
Jeremy Lefroy
Paul Scully
Henry Smith

INTERNATIONAL TRADE (4 places)

Julia Dockerill
Nigel Evans
Marcus Fysh
Ranil Jayawardena

PUBLIC ADMINSTRATION AND CONSTITUTIONAL AFFAIRS (4 places)

Marcus Fysh
Cheryl Gillan
David Jones
David Morris

TRANSPORT (4 places)

Steve Double
Huw Merriman
Iain Stewart
Martin Vickers

Graham Brady says there is “uncertainty” over the Tory allocation on the crucial Brexit select committee, so he cannot yet announce the result…

Watch & Hear for Last Chime

Crowd of smartphone monkeys gathers for Big Ben silencing…

Leadsom on Austen

She resurrected Jane Austen before she recovered from saying she was one of “the greatest living authors” to one of the “greatest ever authors”. The mainstream media really has it in for Andrea seizing on her slip of the tongue. It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a right winger in possession of much ambition will be tripped up by the media.

Inside the House of Commons Departure Lounge

The House of Commons was today a green-benched departure lounge; Theresa May and Jeremy Corbyn were two very different holidaymakers. Wan-faced frequent filer Theresa, slumped closest to the gate, was barely distinguishable from a battered old vending machine in a London Gatwick corner. Equally mechanical, but less full of sweetness, for Theresa it was just a 45 minute wait for her flight-outta-here; if she could have had speedy boarding she would have paid for it gladly. In strolls sombrero-toting ethical-traveller Jeremy Corbyn, with glee only shared by priapic teenage boys awaiting their first flight to Ibiza. He knows his hols will be spent ‘campaigning’ on beaches, surrounded by socialist vixens in hammer and sickle bikinis (basically). Over magazine-tops in air-conditioned lounges we will all observe our fellow travellers this summer. Hopefully we won’t end up on the same plane as these two…

In an unhelpful metaphor for the government, the first question was about driver-less cars. “This country is a world leader in driver-less cars and that’s part of our strong economy“: Theresa May might as well have been reading out a lifeless feature from an in-flight magazine. She sounded as robotic as middle-aged cabin crew member reciting a list of overpriced refreshments over an aeroplane’s PA system: it’s all played back from memory and delivered with the excitement and promise of a moist Ryanair sandwich. Like an unmanned aerial vehicle all she does is drone. Corbyn once again demonstrated his navigational ineptitude by taking off in the direction of public sector pay and only eventually getting round to Cabinet in-fighting. Would you let that man fly your plane? Would you let him sit in the special seat by the emergency exit? It’s not likely to trouble you this summer, but if you do find yourself on the same plane as Jez, remember that he is probably only there to assist in a hijacking. Alert the sky marshal should you see him aboard…

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SNP MP Wears Scotland Football Shirt at PMQs

Hannah Bardell taking the relaxed Commons dress code a little far. Get a grip Mr Speaker…

May on Approaching Reshuffle

Freudian slip?

H/T @DavidScullion
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Quote of the Day

Sky’s Faisal Islam on the mood in Parliament at the moment:

“It’s a totally febrile atmosphere here. It’s kind of like Game of Thrones meets House of Cards – and if you chuck in the Labour Party – Laurel and Hardy too.”

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