Danczuk to Seumas: “Call Me For Advice”

Simon Danczuk – hounded by the Corbyn wing of the Labour Party on account of his love life – has seen this morning’s revelations about Seumas Milne, and he has some words of advice for the spin chief who worked against him. Simon tells Guido:

“I see Jeremy Corbyn’s right hand man has been photographed with a young lady who is not his wife. I was under the impression that dating younger women wasn’t permitted in Corbyn’s morally pure Labour Party. But for those at the top of the party machine it seems it’s fine to have a colourful love life – just as long as it’s conducted in secret. I’m sure when browsing his morning copy of The Sun Jeremy will have been offended by Seumas’s conduct, will have called him in for a quiet word this morning and will sack him by this evening. If Seumas needs any advice on how to handle these situations he can always give me a call.”

He has a very fair point…

“Seumas, I’m Not Sure This Is a Great Idea”

Pictured on the terrace of a 5-star hotel on Thursday evening, married Labour spin chief Seumas Milne getting hard left with a mystery blonde. The photos show shameless Seumas at the plush Courthouse Hotel in Shoreditch – the opposite side of London to his Richmond family home – where a standard room costs £300 per night. Milne can be seen leaning in for a passionate kiss, before hugging his lady companion and sitting with her legs draped across him.

A bystander said:

“They had a table to themselves. He was drinking a pink cocktail type thing. She looked younger than he is, I would say in her early thirties, early-to-mid thirties. They were there for a good hour or so. They were very hands on, full on heavy petting. There was a lot of hugging, stroking, kissing and intimate talking going on. The photo where her her head is nestled into him – that was them getting off, that was them mid-snog. We saw them leave together down the walkway back inside the hotel.”

Asked if he wanted to comment when doorstepped by The Sun last night, Seumas, who is married to 60 year-old Cristina Montanari, replied: “I don’t think so“. When the spokesman needs a spokesman…

Call 0709 284 0531 for picture syndication.

Rich’s Monday Morning Cartoon

Seumas Ordered Corbyn to Spin His Real Views on Defence

Seumas Milne ordered Jeremy Corbyn to spin his real views on defence in order to “close down” criticism in the last few days of the election. In the Mail on Sunday’s recording of Seumas having a loud conversation with Jezza on a train, Labour’s strategy chief says:

“We need to find, I think overnight, without looking defensive of trying to seal down the Trident thing so it doesn’t keep intruding in the next few days… It might be worth thinking in the morning how when you do this thing in Lincoln… then maybe do a clip later where you will be asked about it.  We should maybe find a formula to close it down… We just, I think we just need a form of words.”

Corbyn found that “form of words” in his response to the London Bridge attack:

“I will take whatever action is necessary and effective to protect the security of our people and our country. That includes full authority for the police to use whatever force is necessary to protect and save life as they did last night, as they did in Westminster in March.”

Corbyn’s overnight conversion on defence is not a reflection of his true views. It was a “formula” conceived by Seumas to fool voters…

CCTV Footage Shows “Caged Tiger” Seumas Milne

CCTV footage obtained by Guido shows Corbyn’s left-hand man and chief of spin, Seumas Milne, making a call across the road from Labour’s HQ that he does not want overheard by his co-workers (after all, moderates have ears). What struck Guido was how he paced up and down for a very long time, in the way that caged zoo animals do when stressed. This is a short excerpt from footage of what was a very long, animated and stressed call. Message from the ground not tallying with the polls?

Len and Seumas’ Champagne Celebration

Allies of Len McCluskey mocked Gerard Coyne and Labour Blairites earlier by claiming they would be drowning their sorrows with “Peroni and chablis”. Well, tonight Red Len is drinking champagne at a victory party with Seumas Milne and a who’s who of lefties at Boot and Flogger by London Bridge. A bar in the heart of the City, famous for serving champagne in tankards…

UPDATE: The cheapest bottle of champagne at Len’s victory party is £51. The group have got through 20+ bottles of bubbly as of 8:52pm.

Seumas on Extremists

Via the FT’s Jim Pickard: Seumas Milne’s idea for Labour election catchphrase:

“The Tories are the real extremists.”

Seumas Officially Leaves Guardian

Guardian editor Kath Viner emails staff:

“I’m writing to let you know that, following a period of unpaid leave from Guardian News & Media, Seumas Milne has decided to continue in his role as the Labour party’s strategy and communications director, and is leaving the staff of the Guardian.

I would like to thank Seumas for his brilliant Guardian journalism, and we hope he’ll write for us again in the future.”

At last…

McCluskey Plans to Shaft Corbyn

Back in October last year Guido reported that:

“After Unite’s internal elections in 2018 the expectation is that McCluskey, having secured his own re-election, will decide to flex Unite’s financial and organisational muscle to put someone more competent and electable in as Labour’s leader.”

It was pretty much an open secret in Labour Party circles, today confirmed by Len to the Mirror:

“Let’s suppose we are not having a snap election. It buys into this question of what happens if we get to 2019 and opinion polls are still awful. The truth is everybody would examine that situation, including Jeremy Corbyn and John McDonnell. These two are not egomaniacs, they are not desperate to cling on to power for power’s sake.”

Given the public have made their mind up about Jezza, who might succeed him? Guido is not as sure that about John McDonnell’s lack of ego as Len. Clive Lewis is the preferred option of the likes of Paul Mason – that we know due to the audio exposure of his two-faced support. Guido detects Lewis also has leftie luvvie media support from the likes of Owen Jones. Lewis himself has been publicly shifting his position on two litmus test positions; Trident replacement and immigration. Conventional Labour Party wisdom outside the Corbynistas is that they are unelectable if they don’t shift on these two issues. Remember Lewis was humiliated by Seumas Milne, a humiliation that may prove costly.

Guido wonders if Jezza might not be relieved to surrender the leadership to Lewis. McDonnell on the other hand…

This will all play into May’s general election timing calculations. She will thrash a Corbyn led Labour Party. Will she thrash a younger more vigorous Labour Party leader repackaged as Britain’s version of Obama? Would that prospect have her make an election dash…

Old Wykehamist News

capture

The Winchester College Society’sThe Trusty Servant magazine doesn’t really cover politics as a rule. Though there is some radical debate within its pages, such as should computer programming eclipse compulsory latin? Nevertheless the school rag does like to keep up with the progress of OWs…

Chaos in the Court of Corbyn

Curiously Paul Mason’s confidante to whom he slags off Corbyn is the Podemos’ foreign affairs chief, Pablo Bustinduy. Podemos is Spain’s radical left party, where we have just seen the ousting of the rival socialist party leader Pedro Sánchez by his own party. In Spain socialists can apparently organise a coup.

Mason is tweeting all manner of excuses and throwing up all kinds of diversory chaff to cover his embarrassment. His timeline is a joy to behold.

The ramifications of this for the Court of Corbyn are magnificent. Milne will now be able to cite Mason’s disloyalty and lack of faith as a means to marginalise him. McDonnell will seethe that an ally like Mason is now without doubt passing him over for the younger, prettier Clive Lewis to be Corbyn’s successor. After Unite’s internal elections in 2018 the expectation is that McCluskey, having secured his own re-election, will decide to flex Unite’s financial and organisational muscle to put someone more competent and electable in as Labour’s leader. That is what Owen Jones means when he caveats his support for Corbyn as conditional….

James Schneider Joining Corbyn’s Office

schneider

Momentum spokesman James Schneider is joining Jeremy Corbyn’s office in a strategic communications role. Guido also understands Seumas Milne will not be leaving in the immediate future and that Schneider will be working under his fellow old Wykehamist in a mid-level role. A Labour spokesman says they do not comment on staffing matters and Schneider has not responded to Guido’s text. Though the move is definitely on…

Seumas Changed Jezza’s Autocue

60k-12k

In the briefing to the Lobby huddle – which is still ongoing – Seumas corrected a figure in the briefed out printed copy of Jezza’s speech from 60,000 new council homes to 12,000. With a smile Seumas told the Lobby hacks that Corbyn had delivered the correct figure because “it was changed on the autocue”…

Who Will Replace Seumas Milne?

screen-shot-2016-09-28-at-12-59-40

Kevin Maguire, an impeccably connected old comrade of Seumas Milne, reports that Corbyn’s Director of Communications WILL be leaving next month. That would explain the leader’s office denying only that he would quit this week. As ever, Guido gives you your runners and riders for Seumas’ successor…

  • Kevin Maguire – Might the man with the inside track be after the job? Kevin’s coverage of Jezza has always been generous and he at least understands the Lobby. Work rate might be an issue. And he’d never take the pay cut.
  • Owen Jones – Reportedly tapped up for the job last year, Owen has offered his helpful thoughts on Labour’s media strategy over the last few months, though that has not endeared him to Twitter Corbynistas who now think he’s a Blairite MSM sellout. Owen tells Guido he does not want the job.
  • Paul Mason – The leather jacket-clad former BBC man is Jezza’s most vocal media cheerleader, he could step into Seumas’ shoes with his chat about neoliberalism around the water cooler in Norman Shaw South. Corbynistas tell Guido to expect to see more of Mason in the future. He has however publicly denied he’s interested.
  • James Schneider – Momentum’s spokesman is a true believer and gets on relatively well with journalists. He’s one of their more competent media performers though, and taking the job would mean he’s off the telly.
  • Sam Tarry – Ran Corbyn’s leadership campaign, key in Momentum and political officer for the TSSA union. One of the most important behind-the-scenes Corbynistas.
  • Alex Flynn – Len McCluskey’s right hand man, Flynn is the head of media at Unite. He wants to be an MP so a stint doing comms for Jez would put him in a strong position come 2020. Ambitious. 
  • Rachel Shabi – You’ll probably recognise Rachel from her regular TV appearances spinning for Corbyn as a journalist. Would be unlike Jez to appoint a woman though.
  • Ben Chacko – The editor of the Morning Star, the one paper you’ll see laid out on the desks in the leader’s office every morning. Might Ben and his luscious locks fancy the gig? Actual commie.
  • Aaron Bastani – One of the leaders of the Corbynista new media revolution, amateur bodybuilder and former Tory sympathiser Bastani runs Novara, a weird pro-Corbyn blog. Aaron did unfortunately once smash up a bank, so it’s doubtful he’d pass parliament’s security checks.
  • Liam Young – The New Statesman blogger who is your go to guy for student-level Jez fanboy copy. Only 16 years old.
  • Steve Topple – Surely it’s time for the Canary to make it official. Topple was the loony blogger who came up with the Portland conspiracy theory. He also shares Seumas’ views on Russia. He’d root out the Zionists in the Lobby.
  • Dr Eoin Clarke – Don’t be silly.

Who’s your money on?

Missing Milne Set to Quit?

The word going round the Mirror party at Circo Bar in the early hours was that Seumas Milne is to leave his role in Corbyn’s office imminently. Milne went missing for the key pre-leader’s speech briefing delivered to journalists yesterday afternoon, bizarrely sending out junior spinners to do the job instead. There was bewilderment both in the press room and among Corbyn supporters that Milne hadn’t taken responsibility for such an important briefing – trailing the speech in the press was probably his most important job this week and he didn’t show up. His imminent departure would explain the no-show…

UPDATE: Corbyn’s office are insisting that Milne is not going anywhere. A Labour source tells Guido: “The story about Seumas leaving on Friday is untrue.”

Milne Edited Lewis Speech Without Telling Him


Shadow defence secretary Clive Lewis’ speech was edited to remove a section on Trident – without him knowing. Word is going round that Seumas Milne removed the section at the last moment without telling Lewis. Sources say the first Lewis knew of this was when he read it off the autocue. The Times is even reporting that Milne went into the autocue room and made the alteration, then left a post it note on his podium, leaving the perplexed Lewis furious and shouting in the leaders office. His Ron Burgundy moment…

UPDATE: This looks like the moment he read Comrade Milne’s email.

Milne Likes Tweet Claiming “New World Order Created ISIS”

milne

Corbyn strategy chief Seumas Milne must have pressed the wrong button by accident, because he has “liked” a tweet claiming ISIS was created by the “New World Order”. It must surely be an innocent case of fat finger, Seumas can’t possibly believe that’s true. Although he did write this for the Guardian last year, claiming the US “incubated” and “fuelled the rise of ISIS”…

Screen Shot 2016-08-31 at 23.11.38

Come on Seumas, get it right, everyone knows it was the Zionists…

Seumas Fails to Support Corbyn

seumas-fails

Around the country Constituency Labour Parties are holding votes endorsing candidates and expressing confidence or no confidence in Corbyn. Last night in leafy Richmond the local Labour Party supported Owen Smith for Labour Party leader. Richmond CLP is of course Seumas Milne’s own Labour branch…

The wraith-like commissar for Corbyn did not show up last night, much to the disappointment of the Blairite counter-revolutionaries in Richmond. Could Seumas have swayed the result on his home patch? Not all those new £25 members will be for Corbyn…

Seumas’ Bad Idea

What is it with Team Jez and letting the cameras in?

Labour Seeking New Cheapo Spin Chief

jobs

Labour are looking for an “experienced” new Head of Press, though they’re offering a measly £41,000 for the role – hardly enough to tempt a top hack or spinner to put up with reporting to Seumas Milne. The new spin doctor’s contract will expire in December, so there’s not much job security either.[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +



Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

Jeremy Corbyn told by veteran Jewish MP Margaret Hodge…

“You’re a f***ing anti-aemite and a racist”

Sponsors

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.
Marr’s May Monopoly Marr’s May Monopoly
CCHQ Begs Association Chairmen CCHQ Begs Association Chairmen
Poll: Voters 2 to 1 for No Deal Poll: Voters 2 to 1 for No Deal
Paul Mason Reported to Police Paul Mason Reported to Police
Etonian Free Cabinet Etonian Free Cabinet
Tory MP Puts Letter In to Brady Tory MP Puts Letter In to Brady
Lord Carrington Lord Carrington
Poll: May’s Deal or No Deal? Poll: May’s Deal or No Deal?
Labour’s Chequers Survival Kit Labour’s Chequers Survival Kit
Whips’ Patsies in Full Whips’ Patsies in Full
Tories Will Lose Votes if They Cross Brexit Red Lines Tories Will Lose Votes if They Cross Brexit Red Lines
Remain Used Same Spending Tactics as Leave But Far Worse Remain Used Same Spending Tactics as Leave But Far Worse
Paul Mason’s Coming Home to England Paul Mason’s Coming Home to England
Penny’s Sign Language at Despatch Box Penny’s Sign Language at Despatch Box
Lefties Disappointed as England Win Lefties Disappointed as England Win
SNP Plot to Ruin England Match SNP Plot to Ruin England Match
MEPs Vote to Reject Transparency MEPs Vote to Reject Transparency
Labour Reinstate Jared Labour Reinstate Jared