Rory’s Taken a Helluva Beating

Guido thought it would be fun – in light of Boris’s big win today – to revisit the emphatic assurances Rory made, that the EU absolutely would not offer any meaningful changes to the Withdrawal Agreement. That is was not realistic to get a deal from the EU by October 31. Boris didn’t understand Brussels. Rory believed in the bin, and his predictions were trashed…

UPDATE: Rory responds to Guido’s article

Rory: Livingstone was a Better Mayor than Boris

Guido’s not sure Rory’s walking tour will be warmly welcomed in Finchley and Barnet…

Which MPs Haven’t Collected their Extinction Rebellion Tree?

Well down the list of Extinction Rebellion’s Christmas list manifesto is to encourage the planting of more trees. As part of their Westminster protests, the climate communists have set up stall opposite Parliament with the offer of one free tree for each MP to take back to their constituency and plant. Go back to your constituencies, and prepare to save the planet…

Guido thought he’d pop along to see which MPs have turned down the kind offer, and given the self-professed climate credentials of some MPs he was surprised to see their trees still unclaimed. Appropriately, Barry Gardiner had collected his…

Particularly surprising to see uncollected was Ed Miliband’s tree, who, as a former environment secretary, has made banging on about the environment his métier, Jeremy Corbyn’s, who could easily pop it in the corner of his allotment; and Rory Stewart’s, who made planting 100 million trees one of his key pledges when running for the Tory leadership. Not a spot on Extinction Rebellion’s stated aim of one billion…

Guido also thought Extinction Rebellion might be interested in noting that over the last 35 years, global forest loss has been more than offset by new forest growth anyway. MPs have until early afternoon to collect their sapling. Guido’s sure they would reGreta missing out…

Rory Announced His Resignation Last Night But Everyone Took It As a Joke

At Letters Live last night in the Royal Albert Hall, Rory Stewart announced his resignation on stage, before reading a letter from Eton professor to Stanley Johnson. No one took it seriously. Perhaps they should have…

Rory Resigns from Tories, Announces Standing Down

To the surprise of virtually no one Rory Stewart announces “It’s been a great privilege to serve Penrith and The Border for the last ten years, so it is with sadness that I am announcing that I will be standing down at the next election, and that I have also resigned from the Conservative Party.”

So that is two recent wannabe leaders of the Tories who have quit since losing…

Only Five of the 21 Rebels Want to Return to Tory Fold

Only five of the 21 expelled Tory rebels still wish to return to the Conservative Party, according to a senior One Nation source. Namely, Amber Rudd, David Guake, Richard Benyon and Stephen and Philip Hammond. You couldn’t guess some of them want to return given how they’ve been behaving since losing the whip…

Whilst it was obvious some of the cohort – such as Sam Gyimah who is now a Lib Dem, and Rory Stewart who plans on standing as an independent – had given up on rejoining to Tory Party’s loving embrace, it was still assumed the majority of independent remainers would look at regaining the whip once Brexit is sorted. It’s also believed that only Rory has any chance of keeping his seat if standing as an independent…

In other wet Tory news, the Tory Reform Group held their one nation drinks reception yesterday, during which Justice Secretary Robert Buckland said multiple times “I am the law” and one member fainted. They’re truly dropping like flies…

UPDATE: A sign of further Tory independents to Lib Dem defections? Anne Milton and Guto Bebb spotted plotting with Phillip Lee and Sam Gyimah in PCH…

Rory to Launch His ‘En Marche’ Movement Next Week

Living up to the promise he made after being voted out of the Tory Leadership Contest, Guido learns that Rory will be launching his new centrist movement next week. He’s referred to it as his ‘En Marche’ campaign…

Guido hears that his team – led by former SpAd Lizzie Loudon – have been calling around former members of the ‘Rory for Leader’ campaign, asking whether they are free for the launch next week. Rory was meant to be going to conference, however he has now pulled out of his events further signifying a launch next week.

As of yet, the movement doesn’t have a name and will be used to for the moment to lobby for the passing of a Brexit Deal. It has been months since anyone proposed a new centrist party…

UPDATE: Over the weekend, Rory denied he will be launching anything this week. Looks like that may be true, however Guido hears he is currently advertising a new campaign manager role for the movement through private recruitment agencies, with the aim to starting within a fortnight…

Ex-Tory Remainer Rebels Are Sick of Rory Taking Credit

Guido hears that some among the 21 ex-Tories who voted for the Benn ‘Surrender Act’ are sick to the hilt with the former leadership contender swanning TV studios taking credit for action against the government. The whispers are that Rory did not help at all with the bill, other than swooping in at the end to vote for it and claim all the credit. Guido can scarcely believe that the Cabinet-minister-for-two-minutes turned artificially inflated leadership contender could be so self aggrandising… 

Where’s Rory’s Parliament?

During his fifteen minutes of fame leadership election, Rory Stewart repeatedly said that if Boris tried “locking the doors of Parliament”, he and every other MP would “sit across the road in Methodist Central Hall and we will hold our own session”. Guido even kept the receipts:

Now that Boris has done just that – for the dictatorial length of four whole sitting days – Guido wondered whether Rory was planning on keeping true to his word. Given Parliament will not be prorogued from at least 12 September, Methodist Central Hall remains totally free for Remain MPs to book out. Or for Leavers to host a party in…

Tory Minister’s Remain Love-In

Despite Boris’s insistence that all Ministers have to be on board with leaving the EU on the 31st October, deal or no deal, it seems not all of his new appointments are quite so enamoured with his policy. Transport Minister George Freeman this morning appeared on the Huffington Post podcast ‘Commons People’ and launched into an anti-no deal rant, claiming that “WTO long-term” would be an “absolute disaster that would leave my party out of office for decades”. Not exactly the Downing Street line to take…

Freeman freestyling on message doesn’t seem to just be confined to podcasts, his Big Tent Ideas Festival this year has a rather unexpected lineup for an event originally billed as coming from the “small c, pro-enterprise, innovation and reforming branch of Conservatism”. Guido is struggling to tell it apart from a Labour fringe event:

  • Seema Malhotra. Labour MP
  • Lisa Nandy. Labour MP
  • Darren Jones. Labour MP
  • Peter Kyle. One of the chief agitators for a second referendum
  • Ash Sarkar. Literally a communist
  • Damian Collins. Former Carole Cadwalla-borator-in-Chief
  • Nora Mulready. Former Change UK Candidate
  • Ayesha Hazarika. Former Brown, Harman and Miliband advisor
  • Isi Daley and Amanda Chetwynd-Cowieson. Full-time Remain activists
  • Miatta Fahnbulleh. CEO of nutty hard-left think tank NEF
  • Jacqui Smith. Former Labour Home Secretary
  • Erica Ramos. NUS and second referendum supporter
  • Rory Stewart. One of the most right-wing people there…

In Freeman’s defence there are some Tory Brexiteers going including Bob Seely, Penny Mordaunt and Liam Halligan, although they’re firmly in the minority. He’s going to need a pretty big tent…

Tory Leadership: Decision Day

It’s crunch time in the Tory leadership race – by the end of the day we will know who the final two are, however many votes it takes. After last night’s results, Saj is trailing Hunt and Gove by several votes, however he was quick to insist that he wouldn’t be withdrawing. This means there will be at least two votes today:

  • 10 a.m.-Midday: MPs vote in fourth ballot
  • 1 p.m.: Fourth round result – three candidates left
  • 3.30-5.30 p.m.: MPs vote in fifth ballot
  • 6 p.m.: Fifth round result – two candidates left

In the unlikely event that there’s a tie, there will be an extra round of voting into the night from 7.30-9.30pm, with the final result as soon as possible after that. With many MPs going back to their constituencies on Thursday afternoon, as many as 25% of votes today are expected to be by proxy. One person who will definitely be voting by proxy is Theresa May who’s heading off to Brussels for another EU summit. 1922 Committee Vice-Chair Charles Walker has been entrusted with her vote…

With the unpredictable factor of Rory Stewart now out of the race, the talk this morning is that Team Boris is now on maneouvres to take out Gove by pushing the Saj through at his expense. Gove’s 2016 betrayal has still not been forgotten by many Boris supporters, they are out for revenge by dumping him out this time…

Rory’s 10 Most Messianic Tweets

Rory Stewart’s success at turning himself into a social media meme seems to have slightly gone to his head, to the extent that he was calling for all the other candidates to drop out and support him alone this morning. Guido has compiled his most Messianic/Macronic moments for your enjoyment…

Britain’s answer to Macron, really?

Me, he…Talking about yourself in the third person. Guido asks “What kind of egomaniac does that?”

Raab Backs Boris

Dominic Raab’s exit from the leadership race yesterday has seen a large number of his supporters flock over to the Boris camp – now Raab has given him a birthday gift of himself. Raab backs Boris as the “only candidate” who can deliver Brexit by October 31…

Boris now has a clear majority of public declarations. Despite Rory pulling ahead of Saj last round his supporters are still unwilling to out themselves – after Rory’s poor performance in the debate last night it’ll be a close call as to who gets the chop. Team Boris have been putting pressure on Saj to drop out to leave Rory in last place and therefore face automatic exclusion although Saj isn’t playing ball. Will they try lending Saj votes instead to knock Rory out directly?

Rory in Talks With Gove Over “Combining Forces”

“We’re talking about combining forces, because it’s clear that Boris is going in to the last round and the question is who is best placed to sit on a stage with Boris Johnson and who is best placed to ask the testing questions that need to be asked.”

Is this a kamikaze effort from Rory..?[…] Read the rest

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Tory Leadership Second Round Results in Full

Here’s how the results broke down for round two of the Tory leadership contest (round one results in brackets):

  • Boris: 126 (114)
  • Hunt: 46 (43)
  • Gove: 41 (37)
  • Rory: 37 (19)
  • Saj: 33 (23)
  • Raab: 30 (27) ELIMINATED

Boris still has more votes than 2nd, 3rd and 4th combined…[…] Read the rest

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Meet the Candidates: Team Rory

Much like the man himself, Rory Stewart’s campaign has meandered between novelty and farce, what there’s no doubt about is that he’s made the biggest impression of all the rivals jockeying for position behind Boris Johnson. Behind the stunts and awkward videos however, there’s a well-organised campaign team skilled in the art of astute press management.[…] Read the rest

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Raab Comes Out Fighting, Saj Cries Foul Over Stewart

Despite ConHome’s latest survey showing Dominic Raab beating everyone but Boris in runoffs with the Tory membership, Raab is one of the candidates who’ll be sitting least comfortably when the second round votes come in tonight. He’s come out fighting with a new video showcasing his karate skills and other parts of his backstory.[…] Read the rest

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How Rory-Mania Could Lead To Boris’ Coronation

Boris Johnson could become Prime Minister tomorrow, thanks to Rory Stewart, obviating the need to go to any public hustings. The 1922 Committee’s new threshold rules mean that any candidate who gets fewer than 33 votes tomorrow is automatically eliminated from the contest, meaning if all but Boris fail to meet the threshold, he becomes PM.[…] Read the rest

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50% of Tory Members Think Rory Would Make a Poor Leader

77% of Tory members think Boris would make a good leader…

MPs backing Boris will be pleased to see that Tory voters agree with members. In fact Boris is the only candidate who commands a positive net approval rating. Something that will perhaps surprise those avid for Javid.[…] Read the rest

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Rory-Mania Sees Punters Make Him Second Favourite

As Rory-mania grips the remainstream media and the country goes wild for him after he proposed setting up his own parliament, punters have flocked to back him, slashing his odds. Hundreds of thousands of pounds have been staked on him overnight making his implied probability of becoming Prime Minister 7%.[…] Read the rest

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Responding to Corbyn’s statement that the US should have arrested ISIS leader, al-Baghdadi, John Mann bluntly tweeted:

Baghdadi blew himself up with a suicide belt. An arrest might have been slightly difficult in these circumstances.”

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