As Guido flagged a fortnight ago, UKIP has committed to winning the nominative determinism prize of the year by selecting Dr Peter Gammons to fight their 2021 London mayoral campaign. Dr Gammons’s ‘doctorate’ comes from Canon University, Florida, an establishment that is not governed by the US Department of Education and gives out ‘PhD’s after a maximum of 126 hours of work. A website claims Dr Gammons has healed a Nepalese man of lung cancer, restored deaf people’s hearing, and completely healed a wheelchair bound sufferer of multiple sclerosis – all through prayer.

He promises to get London moving again my repurposing disused underground tunnels into walkways, safe cycle lanes and “create the world’s first underground ‘Pod’ transport system.” Twitter should have fun with this…