The Boris Bandwagon

Given Cameron isn’t going anywhere any-time soon, Guido is a little surprise that one topic of conversation is already dominating the watering holes of conference – Boris for leader. Despite being confined to the graveyard slot on the morning that everyone is hungover, Boris is stealing the show. Dave’s fake smile said it all…

Osborne is the name that stands in BoJo’s way, but he hardly has the same level of support. The only person really singing Boy George’s praises is Michael Gove. He told the Telegraph: “Are there people in the Cabinet who have the capacity to lead? Yes, and George is pre-eminent among them”. Caveated. Without the prospect of a leadership election for three years, at very least, teams are being picked…

Boris on Cameron the Chump

The hand of the FT’s Christopher Cook can once again be felt in story that the Tories will find rather unhelpful. The disgruntled former Tory adviser has lifted the lid on life working next to Boris’s old parliamentary office. Paul Waugh has got hold of extracts of Cook speaking to Sonia Purnell for a her new “Just Boris” biography:

“Boris and I got on because we have similar dislike of most members of the Conservative party,’ explains Chris Cook – one of David Willetts’ aides, also based in the annexe room. ‘He’s clearly not on the right wing, but actually quite Europhile in Tory terms. He liked to come into our office to gossip and bitch about the right-wingers, particularly Liam Fox, or indeed anyone else he thought had screwed up the party that week.”

Then, coincidently, there are some rather more colourful descriptions of what Boris used to moot as ideas for his Telegraph column. In 2006 he suggested opening one with:

‘One thing that has become apparent to me in my years of Parliamentary service is that David Cameron is a complete c**t’.

Vero nihil verius!

Quote of the Day

Boris Johnson told the editor of The Lady

“Women cannot resist men who obviously like women.”

London's Working Class Prefer Boris to Ken

The latest YouGov polling [pdf] on the London mayoral voting intentions shows Boris leads Ken 44% to 41% amongst the “C2DE” working class voters, even though Labour has a 12% lead nationally amongst the same group of voters in a general election. Ken is clearly the Islington Guardianista candidate…

Downing Street should be worried – the failure to attract working class voters stopped Dave from winning last year. On these numbers Boris could have done it…

+ + + Bonking Boris Cleared over Complaint + + +

Mayor Boris has been cleared of any wrongdoing regarding the hiring of Helen “Mini-Cheddars” Macintyre, the mother of his love-child, after her then husband made a substantial donation. The complaint from Labour was chucked out.

Boris’s shagging is barely a story anymore…

Boris Faces Mistress Scandal Probe

The ongoing mystery surrounding Boris’s mistress, her then boyfriend’s £80,000 donation and her subsequent landing of a job as an Olympic fundraiser just got a little more serious for the wayward Mayor.

Boris is now facing an official investigation regarding Helen Macintyre, the mother of his love child and the latest “love of his life”, and why exactly she got her job. The Standard neatly summarises some awkward questions that need answering:

What are the claims Boris faces?

That he has breached several sections of the GLA code of conduct. This states he should never “improperly confer an advantage on any person”, “place yourself in situations where honesty and integrity may be questioned” or make any decision which affects the “financial position of… any person with whom you have a close association”. It also states that he must “make decisions on merit, including making appointments” and “indicate that you have a personal interest” when one arises.

Labour have triggered the investigation and smell blood after Boris’s election promise to end cronyism at City Hall, something that so damaged the last months of Ken’s regime, though it should be borne in mind that the post was unpaid. Still, not sure this one can be dismissed as an “inverted pyramid of piffle”…

UPDATE : Whilst we’re on the subject, Guido has been meaning to mention for some time that Helen Macintyre’s nickname at Edinburgh University – given to her by a boyfriend – was “mini-cheddars”.

Boris Wasn't Pushed Out, He Jumped

A usually reliable source emails to say contrary to speculation (see below) Boris hasn’t been thrown out by the long-suffering Marina. He has left her and is under the delusion that the latest love interest is “The One”. Here we go again…

Friday Caption Competition (PoJo Edition)

Boris and the Bankers Boogie at Boujis

It seems the age of austerity is yet to hit the gold lined pavements of SW7. Fancy paying £2,500 for dinner with the Mayor and maybe even a dance at favourite Royal haunt Boujis? There will be no banker bashing here…

And for a bounder about town what better way to make sure your girlfriends don’t all bump into each other and cause a dreadful fuss…

Just make them all wear masks!

Boris Rides On

Asked earlier this morning whether he had fathered Helen Macintyre’s baby, Boris was quick to give a full and frank explanation to the story:

“I think this is a fantastic cycle superhighway and I hope people will enjoy it. I’m not getting distracted by any adverse headlines.”

A pretty water-tight denial eh?

Conversation eventually drifted towards arriving “full of serotonin, endorphins, energy”. It is thought the Mayor was discussing his cycle to work rather than anything else…

Bonking Boris Round-Up

Guido did hint at this back in June when there were febrile rumours of injunctions, newspapers camped on doorsteps and even a bastard baby Boris.

The Mirror says there is no suggestion of an affair and then suggests exactly that, while the high-minded Guardian uses the excuse of Helen McIntyre’s unannounced involvement in his “Olympian Erection” to justify its coverage, quoting a Boris spokesman saying that it was the Mayor’s “enthusiasm for private philanthropy” that meant her appointment as a fundraiser on the project had never been publicly announced. Boris clearly likes a bit of “private philanthropy” on the side.

Over at The Evening Standard they explain how this simple ‘friendship’ drove McIntyre apart from her billionaire partner Pierre Rolin. She later reported Rolin for harassment – but not before she’d found time to shag date William Cash, son of Tory MP Bill. So she clearly has a penchant for Tories.

Currently the City Hall game-plan is to say nothing, a plan that has worked up until this morning, given that the rumours have been swirling around since before the general election. Nobody is likely to confess to having had an affair and it is hard to see Ken making an issue of it given the five kids he has fathered by three different women (impressively managing to get two women simultaneously pregnant). Neither is Lembit likely to raise sexual athletics as an issue. The London mayoral contest is not going to be lacking for virility…

It could still get a little embarrassing for Boris, Charles Moore cracks this joke about Boris in speeches “I told Boris I don’t care what he does in his private life and he told me ‘Nor do I’ “.  There is also an attractive American woman who escaped to New York and entertains friends in Manhattan with anecdotes about her pursuit by Boris. His chat up line to her she says was, “I limit myself to one mistress per annum. How would you like to be Miss 2009?” Guido reckons Boris is nevertheless electorally bullet-proof, since it won’t be news to the voters that he is a serial shagger…

Breaking News from South Africa :Boris Caught Playing On Vuvuzela Away from Home

Rumour has it that the Daily Mail has caught Boris playing on the vuvuzela away from home.  Best he remember to bring five of them home for the kids…

King for Mayor

Guido is a little annoyed to be scooped by The Guardian about Oona King’s mayoral campaign. He had a very interesting chat with a cabbie who had picked up two apparatchiks on Victoria Street and overheard their in-depth conversation about the relative merits of King and openly discussing her very active campaign a few weeks back. Won’t bother trying to double source it next time…

High on their list of reasons why they were backing King was the cynical acceptance that it will play well that there has never been a female Mayor, or a black one. If her campaign is as organised as the two Labour staff were suggesting the Ken will not be a problem apparently. Oona vs. Boris? Insert joke here about there only being room for one king etc …

Banker Bashing : Why Boris is Right

Mayor Boris has written to the Chancellor demanding a meeting to discuss his introduction of a 50% tax rate a temporary 50% levy on banking bonuses . In a move that was as vindictive as it was irrational the chancellor is raising the top rate of income tax to 50% in April, making London more expensive for residents earning £1 million a year than New York or Hong Kong, according to KPMG estimates. A London banker on that amount will pay £491,278 in income tax and social security payments from April, a third more than in Hong Kong and £58,500 more than in New York, the data below shows:

Now some might think great, we”ll squeeze ’em till their pips squeak, we’ll bash bankers bonuses. Not for long comrades.   Just as Pol Pot’s extermination of the counter-revolutionary middle-classes (teachers and doctors) left Cambodians uneducated and unheallthy, driving bankers offshore will hurt those left behind more financially.  High-earners are mobile, foreign firms will re-locate, and foreign financial firms definitely won’t choose to locate here in the future.  The predicted one-time billion pound boost to revenue will see many more billions drain away long term. The burden will just fall heavier on those poor taxpayers left in debt ridden Britain…

See also We’ll Pay for Banker Bashing.

Quote of the Day

Einy Shah, Boris staffer, Tweets

“Ha ha Boris on his way out ‘OK, we’re off to save the planet!’ “

Boris Smirks at Marr

Andy Marr interviewed Boris this morning:

Marr : “We seem to be going into a period in politics marked by a bit of class war. Do you think there are enough old Etonians at the top of the Conservative Party at the moment?”
Boris :
This is a brilliantly contrived question. I don’t think … I think the classic answer to this … I can’t remember which school you went to, Andrew.
Marr :
[mumbles] “Lorretto.”
Boris : “Jolly good school..”

Boris smirked at the mention of the poshest school in Scotland, with boarding fees approaching £30,000 a year.  Wonder where he got the idea for that counter-jibe…

Quote of the Day

Franny Armstrong says Boris is her knight on a shining bicycle

“If you find yourself down a dark alleyway and in trouble I think Boris would be of more use than Ken.”

Livingstone Channeling Cameron

Fascinating interview with Ken Livingstone on LabourList – Ken demonstrates his supposed ability to channel the thinking of Dave and Boris:

On Boris and Cameron:

“he took the decision to stand for mayor not on the assumption that he’d win, but on the assumption that he’d run a good campaign, win some credibility and get back in the game in Parliament. I think he was horrified to win, as was Cameron.”

Boris CameronVictory

Here they are pictured on election night looking horrified.

Alex Smith, perhaps a little quizzically, follows up with “You think Cameron was horrified that Boris won the London mayoralty?”

Yeah. If you look at the Euro election results thirteen months on, Labour had its best result vis a vis the rest of the country that we’ve ever had. We came second only to the northeast in terms of the size of the Labour vote – that’s unheard of. That is partly because people see Boris and he doesn’t give them confidence about what a Tory government would do. Londoners are privileged to see the slight outline of what a Tory government might be like. The first year after my defeat, people kept coming up to me saying “how did he get in, it’s awful”. Now they come up to me and say “I voted for Boris, but I’ll never do it again, please forgive me!”

Of course in the South East where people know Boris and a London Tory administration best, Labour actually came fifth in the recent Euro-elections.   Has Ken lost his grip on reality completely?

Sacked Boris Aide Lunched His Mistress on Expenses

Andrew Gilligan and Paul Waugh have been digging into Ian Clement’s expense claims for restaurant meals charged to the public purse on a City Hall credit card. It appears he was taking out his mistress

Boris Takes the Plunge

This crosses over from ‘laughing with’, into ‘laughing at’…[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +



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Quote of the Day

Former public schoolboy Chuka Umunna told the  ‘Exit From Brexit Dinner’…

“Remainians, Remoaners, I don’t care what the label is, I’m proud. It’s fashionable to label everyone in this room as the liberal metropolitan elite . . . This caricature is promoted by a bunch of former public schoolboys!” 

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