Labour Shadow Cabinet Drown Their Sorrows

Labour’s leadership contest was in full swing last night after the PLP hustings, with almost all contenders taking to Strangers bar to lobby fellow MPs. Parliament’s bar’s veterans were amazed to see the likes of Starmer, Long-Bailey, Rayner, Thornberry and Phillips – almost never been spotted there – getting merry. Damian McBride, no stranger to Strangers, was seen pressing the flesh on behalf his mistress, the Shadow Foreign Secretary, in the forlorn search for a single endorsement. Burgon almost found his way to Strangers, instead he ended up having his dinner in the Commons canteen with Cat Smith instead, in turn missing a few votes…

After staying until closing in the newly inclusive Strangers bar (now allowing staff in as well as MPs) – an elite group of the Shadow Cabinet headed off to Players bar – where the resentful attitude of attending Labourites towards the Shadow Cabinet members for losing the election made things decidedly less merry. Ashworth, Louise Haigh, Chris Bryant and Lord Adonis still managed to enjoy themselves, dad-dancing and loudly singing along to apropos lyrics, “Losing everything, it’s like the sun going down on me”. Sad…

In the end, a row erupted after a singer in the bar adapted the lyrics of Frank Sinatra’s ‘My Way’ to say “the record shows, we took the blows and we lost ’cause of your way”. Chris Bryant shot back with “no we didn’t” eventually resulting in the singer calling the Shadow Cabinet “c**ts”. Singing truth to the powerless.

Expect Labour MPs to be getting on the booze a lot over the coming months…

mdi-timer 8th January 2020 @ 10:27 am 8th Jan 2020 @ 10:27 am mdi-comment Comments
Adonis Fails to Make Labour Selection List for Vauxhall

The New Statesman is reporting that after spending a lot of time on the streets campaigning and putting out a few high-production campaign videos, Andrew Adonis has failed to make Labour’s long list for the Vauxhall seat. Failed to become an MEP, failed to become and MP and failing to reverse Brexit. Perhaps the unelected Lords is his best hope after all…

mdi-timer 16th October 2019 @ 4:38 pm 16th Oct 2019 @ 4:38 pm mdi-comment Comments
Adonis Wants Himself Barred from Responsible Office for Life

Nutty anti-Brexit rants from Andrew Adonis are nothing new, however he’s even managed to appal #FBPErs with his latest offering. Labour’s shadow mental health minister Barbara Keeley has refused to comment…

It’s still up 7 hours later, he’s even doubled down on it in the mean time. A far cry from last October when he said suicide prevention was “so serious a health and social issue, we should confront it openly as a central challenge of public services and society at large.” Helpfully he’s already provided the appropriate response to his own deranged behaviour:

Will he follow his own advice..?

mdi-timer 1st August 2019 @ 3:14 pm 1st Aug 2019 @ 3:14 pm mdi-comment Comments
Friday Caption Contest (Tinfoil Hat Edition)

Entries in the comments…

mdi-timer 26th April 2019 @ 1:00 pm 26th Apr 2019 @ 1:00 pm mdi-comment Comments
Remainers Turn on Adonis After His Brexit Conversion

Newly selected Labour MEP Lord Adonis appears to have had a conversion of biblical proportions over Brexit – the Remainiac-in-chief posted a remarkable statement on Facebook yesterday. Not only did Adonis apologise for previously telling Brexiteers to not vote Labour, he even talks about respecting the referendum result:

Turns out that standing for an election and facing voters for the first time in over 30 years wasn’t as straightforward as Adonis thought. However his own website doesn’t seem to have caught up with his screeching U-turn yet, he is still ranting about “democratically” stopping Brexit on there:

The CHUKas can’t stop gloating, while Adonis’s diehard FBPE fans have been taking to Twitter to bemoan how “astonished and deeply disappointed” they are that he has swung the other way on Brexit. They’ve even set up a hashtag of #UnfollowAdonis. Will they be asking for their money back from tickets to his shows?

mdi-timer 25th April 2019 @ 9:18 am 25th Apr 2019 @ 9:18 am mdi-comment Comments
Adonis Forgets to Turn Up to Table his own Anti-Brexit Vote

Peers were surprised when Lord Adonis failed to turn up to table his own motion designed to kill a piece of the Government’s no deal legislation late on Monday night. It turns out Adonis failed to show as he was busy delivering a “what if” lecture in the Speaker’s House on his personal hero Roy Jenkins. All very well but how is Adonis ever going to succeed in his crusade to stop Brexit if he’s blowing off opportunities to derail no deal laws in favour of self-aggrandising speaking events?

mdi-timer 27th February 2019 @ 5:15 pm 27th Feb 2019 @ 5:15 pm mdi-comment Comments
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