He’s back. Having hung up his hat and unzipped his gilet, jet-lagged, jungle-bronze-medalist Matt Hancock has finally returned to the Commons after a month Down Under. Just in time for the second reading of his dyslexia Bill…

Deputy Speaker Nigel Evans couldn’t resist the inviting goalmouth:

Evans: “The third Bill of the day and I know that Mr. Hancock, you appear to be making a habit of coming third these days.”

Matt Hancock: “… I’m not quite sure what to make of that. But I’m honoured to be… third today. And let’s see… how that goes. But it’s also a pleasure to be here and to be clean and well fed.”

Clean, well-fed, and as one MP in the chamber pointed out, with “No frog on his head”…