Saturday Shorts last week gave an account of the opposition practice of calling for the Government and Ministers to apologise or to “say sorry”, citing 16 examples from one week’s proceedings. Observers in the Gallery find the practice comically counter-productive, as:

The trick attempts to paint their accused as naughty children – but it actually portrays the accusers themselves as nags, scolds and end-of-tether mothers. They are caught in their own trap. They are the butt of their own joke.

Distressingly for those who collect these things, calls for contrition have slumped in the last week with only six cases on the floor of the House, a 62.5% reduction from the previous week.

Steve Reed (Lab Co-op): Will he take the opportunity of International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women to apologise to rape survivors?

Stephen Kinnock (Labour): Will he apologise to the couples who have had to cancel their wedding receptions?

Louise Haigh (Labour): Will the Rail Minister apologise for his predecessor’s signing off the decision to slash tens of thousands of services every month?

Tulip Saddiq: (Labour) The public deserve an apology.

Bell Ribeiro-Addy: We have yet to hear Ministers apologise for their actions during this débacle.

Tanmanjeet Singh Dhesi (Lab): Will the Minister take the opportunity to apologise to bereaved families for the amazing lack of integrity at the heart of the whole process?

Guido hopes it picks up again before Christmas. NB: Challengers for the No. 1 slot will have to beat the SNP’s Patricia Gibson’s trail-blazing “Government is about saying sorry when mistakes are made.”