The much-anticipated Forde report was finally published today, and to anyone not obsessed about Labour factions and Kremlinology it’s pretty much irrelevant, meaningless and changes nothing. The report provides a damning critique of the culture, antisemitism and factionalism within the Labour Party from 2014-19, which – until now – has been a complete secret. The report was sparked by the leaking of a report written by Labour staff in the wake of the EHCR antisemitism ruling, which was accused of being a Corbynite whitewash and selectively leaking out-of-touch staff WhatsApp messages to damage anti-Corbyn actors.

Flicking through the report, neither side comes out well. Owen Jones did a long thread covering all the Forde allegations that slammed the right of the party, an hour and a half after he predicted it would be a Starmerite whitewash – funny how things change. Both sides get accused of weaponising antisemitism against the other, and criticised “a culture of intellectual smugness which exists at the extremes of the political spectrum the party represents”. Seriously, this is really novel, groundbreaking stuff…

A particular highlight concerned an analysis of WhatsApp messages from the leaked report. This included messages from senior party staff reporting the former Shadow Home Secretary was spotted “crying in the loos” and later in a branch of Leon talking about leaking information to Michael Crick. Despite the prior leaked report interpreting these claims as factual, the Forde report finds “they are clearly not literal” and “do not relate to real sightings of Diane Abbott”. Guido’s more than happy to inform co-conspirators of the vile slurs against Diane’s impeccable character…