Hacks anxiously awaiting a reshuffle this week after Monday’s confidence vote have been left disappointed, and it turns out there’s one man to blame for putting Boris off the idea: top coup instigator Tobias Ellwood. As rumours circulated throughout the week about potential personnel changes, Guido understands that when privately asked about it, Boris said “the trouble with a reshuffle is it’ll create another load of bloody Tobias Ellwoods…” In fact, Ellwood has become so unpopular with some of his colleagues that at least one minister has even blocked him on Twitter, having finally lost patience…

Party frustrations with Ellwood aren’t just limited to SW1. Guido also hears whispers from within his local association down in Bournemouth East that members are considering a campaign to deselect him as the candidate ahead of the next general election, following his genius idea to rejoin the EU single market and open the doors to uncontrolled immigration. One member even claimed to be “ashamed” of voting for him, with an online #EllwoodOut campaign also picking up steam. This will all no doubt come as a huge surprise to a man whose constituency voted 55% for Leave in 2016…