It was just yesterday when Boris warned that the UK was “at risk of a kind of know-nothing, cancel culture iconoclasm”, and if this new 30-page ‘inclusive language guide’ from the Ministry of Defence is anything to go by, it looks like he might be right. You might think that an organisation with a mission that often involves waging war and killing people would be resistant to the march of wokeness…

It’s a gripping read. Describing itself as “a practical toolkit [for] creating a structure and a standard for inclusive language in Defence”, the manual encourages Defence employees (including those on the front line) to “keep referring back to the guidance” to foster an inclusive and professional environment. While it insists it’s “not an attempt to police language”, the guide nonetheless offers some helpful pointers over which phrases might upset fellow soldiers, and some alternatives:

• ❌ “Girls, boys and youngsters” “Colleagues, personnel, young people” ✅
• ❌ “Young and vibrant team” “Effective and vibrant team” ✅
• ❌ “Mature workforce” “Experienced workforce” ✅
• ❌ “The disabled, handicapped” “Person with a disability” ✅
• ❌ “The females in the platoon”  “The women in the platoon” ✅

Despite weighing in at a hefty 30 pages, the guide also warns that “language is constantly evolving, so this guide is not definitive and will be subject to review and updates annually.” Time to get learning… if the MoD is going to bring death and destruction to our enemies, at the very least they should get their pronouns right…