The British Meat Processors Association (BMPA) has claimed that a staff shortage as a result of the UK’s post-Brexit immigration laws is hampering food production, leading to an “inevitable” delay in the delivery of gammon roasts and pigs in blankets this winter. BMPA chief executive Nick Allen insists that a “12-13%” reduction in the number of European lorry drivers has meant that “some of the pig processors are having to cut down on how many pigs they are processing a week”, which will have knock-on effects for winter supplies because “it’s more difficult to time the supply of pigs in the same way that you can for Christmas turkeys”. Blaming a lack of gammon on Brexit will no doubt put the usual FPBE crowd in hysterics…

The solution is straight-forward: attract more Brits to drive lorries by offering them more attractive wages. Large retailers have already figured this out; they’re paying their drivers sign-on bonuses of up to £5,000 and having little trouble hogging supply. This isn’t a bug of Brexit, it’s a feature. While meat-headed industry bosses would rather wallow over the loss of cheap foreign labour than pay domestic workers more, soon they’ll have to accept that their ability to underpay staff is over. Too stub-boar-n to open the piggy bank…