Hancock’s reputation is in tatters, with Labour, the LibDems and the majority of the public calling on him to resign. It didn’t have to be this way…

The husband of Gina Coladangelo, Oliver Tress, has helpfully provided some advice to Brits to keep them on the straight and narrow at night. Today the firm he founded, Oliver Bonas, sent an email to subscribers promoting free hand cream worth £8.50 – perfect for keeping the user as slippery as Hancock. 

Even more useful was Bonas’s Guide to Masturbation – published at the end of last month to coincide with “May-sturbation” – which promised to explain “the many benefits that self pleasure has on our health and wellbeing”. Wise advice, clearly unheeded by some…