A co-conspirator searching for a flat in London was amused to discover that, following recent news about the No. 10 flat renovation, Boris’s state apartment has been up for rent on popular website Spareroom.com for almost a week. The listing by “Boris” – for an incredibly reasonable £750 per month – boasts a recent £58,000 makeover, “making it perfect for relaxation, executive living and privacy in a prime location in the heart of Zone 1.” The joke listing isn’t completely unbelievable, given cash-strapped Boris has only recently put his Oxfordshire home on the rental market…

“You’ll be sharing with me and my partner and our small child. We’ve also got a housemate called Rishi – he’s an accountant. My mate Dominic used to hang out here a lot, but there have been quite a few comings and goings and he’s moved on. Said he didn’t like the new decor – he must need his eyes testing!”

While all bills are covered, including regular cleaning, utility bills, and Netflix, it’s warned the TV licence may be scrapped. An absolute steal…