In a sure sign that Parliament is more than ready to break up for Christmas, Home Office minister Victoria Atkins informed the Commons that not only does she have the “most beautiful cat in the world” but that his name is “Gaston the Turbo-Snail”, courtesy of her four-year-old son. Somehow it’s not even the most implausible phrase that’s been uttered in Parliament recently…

UPDATE: A co-conspirator gets in touch with the surprising news that despite the name, Gaston the Turbo-Snail is in fact a female cat…

UPDATE: Guido brings you a photo of Gaston herself: