Momentum Soft Smut Snapper Rejected as Labour Candidate

A top Momentum activist Guido revealed as a soft smut glamour snapper has been turned down for selection as a Labour candidate because of his saucy extracurricular activities. Mike Fieldhouse, who boasted of working with“top price models” with “perfect body statistics”, applied to stand as a local election candidate in Southend. He was rejected after a video emerged of him posing-up sultry seductresses in stockings and suspenders. A letter to Fieldhouse from the assessment panel read:

“The decision not to approve your candidature this time was taken in respect of the potential for your profession as a glamour photographer and the work your produce in that role to cause embarrassment to the party and/or be used as a a political weapon by our opponents given the public coverage it has received thus far. It was further felt that your disclosure of this was insufficiently detailed and that you considered this a trivial matter.”

The smut-merchant got the hump and took to social media to bewail the decision:

Prudes…




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Boris Johnson was shown a trophy monkey head as he toured a room of illegally-poached animals seized by Scotland Yard. He said:

“What’s this poor chap here? Faint air of a … Labour backbencher.”

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