Robert Mendick in The Telegraph has been speaking to ‘friends’ of Seumas Milne who say he was “not a willing participant” in the hour long public display of affection last Thursday night. Guido’s co-conspirator with the camera-phone says otherwise. The ‘friend’ says “I know the pictures tell a different story… But I know there is nothing going on. I don’t think it’s a quick snog. There may have been a bit of nuzzling on her part but if you look at Seumas’s face, you can see he is not a willing participant.” How did Jennifer Robinson get him to hold her head? Did she suck his tongue out of him against his will as well?

Guido suspects Cristina won’t believe him the ‘friend’ and given that Seumas did not do his usual post-PMQs briefing, he didn’t fancy getting a ribbing from the Lobby lads who also don’t him believe. Or perhaps he is hiding a black eye when he failed to duck a flying plate of pasta?

Talking of pasta here is another picture of the couple snapped by a Guido co-conspirator in Ciao Bella. This time in a more discreet corner behind a pillar in the Bloomsbury Italian restaurant which is popular with lawyers. It was taken late on a Friday night a few months ago. It was March 10, if you are interested, Cristina…