US Candidate Publishes “Scandal” List Confessing To “Deep and Casual” Sex

It’s the age of golden shower kompromat. You’re a political candidate fighting a tough election campaign. What keeps you awake at night? The fear that all your past sexual misadventures will be exposed, of course. It’s Guido’s mission to bring them to light…

Noah Dyer, running for governor of Arizona in 2018, is taking a novel approach to the threat posed by nosy hacks. Dyer is short-circuiting political journalism and dirty campaign research by publicly admitting to everything potentially embarrassing he has ever done. He is posting the details on his website in a “scandal and controversy” section:

“Noah has had both deep and casual sexual experiences with all kinds of women.  He is an advocate of open relationships.  He’s had group sex and sex with married women.  He has sent and received intimate texts and pictures, and occasionally recorded video during sex.

“Noah has a negative net worth, given that he has nearly $100,000 in student loan debt. His income based loan repayment plan is actually insufficient to cover the interest, and his balance grows every year.

“During the recession, Noah used credit card cash advances to pay tens of thousands of dollars in child support. He paid some of those debts in full, but ended up settling some those debts individually for anywhere from $0.25 to $0.75 to the dollar. He also sold his home in a short sale.

“Noah is divorced. According to the court arrangement he has his kids 30% of the time. In reality he has them just under half time.”

If there are worse skeletons in Dyer’s closet, this could of course catastrophically backfire. Guido does not approve of candidates revealing their skeletons like this, if it caught on he’d be out of business. Fortunately honest politicians are a rarity…




Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

Ed Miliband goes studs in on Theresa May:

“When PM says “nothing has changed” she is lying. If she lies about this what else?”

Sponsors

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.

Facebook

Sneering Thornberry Sneering Thornberry
Ministers Wheeled Out to Defend Ditched Care Policy Ministers Wheeled Out to Defend Ditched Care Policy
Watch: Crick Roasts “Weak and Wobbly” May Watch: Crick Roasts “Weak and Wobbly” May
Protester Arrested at May Wrexham Visit Protester Arrested at May Wrexham Visit
Clegg Spinning Brexit Doom Report Clegg Spinning Brexit Doom Report
Sunday Shows Sunday Shows
Read Tory Manifesto In Full Read Tory Manifesto In Full
Green Leaders Cringe Skit Green Leaders Cringe Skit
Never Ending Tory Deficit Reduction Horizon Never Ending Tory Deficit Reduction Horizon
LibDem Collapse Explained LibDem Collapse Explained
Taxpayers’ Alliance Updates Iconic Tory Poster Taxpayers’ Alliance Updates Iconic Tory Poster
Cult of Corbyn Cult of Corbyn
“Labour is Chocolate Gateau: Too Much Makes You Sick” “Labour is Chocolate Gateau: Too Much Makes You Sick”
Labour Election Broadcast Star’s “Tax Efficient” Accounting Labour Election Broadcast Star’s “Tax Efficient” Accounting
Reporter Grabs Boob Live on BBC Reporter Grabs Boob Live on BBC
Liar Clegg Brillo’d Liar Clegg Brillo’d
Listen: Was McDonnell Handed Deficit Note? Listen: Was McDonnell Handed Deficit Note?