Inside the PLP: “The Worst Speech I Have Ever Heard in My Life”

All kicking off outside tonight’s PLP meeting, where an emotional John Woodcock has just had a full blown barney with Jeremy Corbyn’s aides. Woodcock shouted at Jezza’s team: “I think it’s extraordinary” that “someone who spreads lies about Labour MPs” could “stand and slag us off to the media”. The message from Corbyn’s spokesman to Labour MPs had been: “If people want to mount a challenge they can do that right now. Jeremy will be a candidate in that election.” In other words, bring it on…

Inside, Corbyn was asked to resign by all wings of the party: lefty Chris Matheson told him he wasn’t a leader, Jess Phillips begged him to quit, Yvette Cooper was the biggest hitter to give a speech, telling Jez he wasn’t good enough. Ex-shadow Scotland secretary Ian Murray revealed to the room that his constituency office had been targeted by Momentum, telling Corbyn “you keep encouraging them”, leaving staff “terrified“. He pleaded with the leadership to “call off the dogs“. Outside  in a protest at Parliament Square Momentum representatives chanted “f**k you” to the plotters. A spokesman for Corbyn said: “Demonstrations are part of our democracy.”

After the calls for his resignation Corbyn gave a speech in which he claimed he wanted the support of the PLP and would listen. Those watching report:

“It was the worst speech I’ve ever heard in my life. He panicked and started talking about the bedroom tax. It’s just a load of bollocks. I’ve never seen a meeting like it.”

Corbynista sources hit back that the room was scared and look terrified they would lose the leadership election and lose control to the left forever. The permanent reshuffle will apparently be concluded tomorrow…




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Jeremy Corbyn on Big Ben Bong Ban

“… if we have to miss Big Ben in reality for a while so that work can be done, well, that’s something we have to go through. It’s not a national disaster or catastrophe.”

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