Ecuador’s Next Top Model

Assange

Milan, Paris, New York, Quito. All global capitals of fashion. And now finally one of them is coming to London. Legendary PR Richard Hillgrove is planning on organising a fashion show on Julian Assange’s catwalk (otherwise referred to as the Ecuadorian embassy) to showcase the nation’s sartorial exports. The event will apparently form part of a week-long fashion week to promote the country’s textile industry, playing host to some of the South American nation’s premier designers and costumes. Luckily for Julian, Guido hears the pale-rapist-locked-in-a-south-American-embassy-look is SO in this season…

Even better for old Julian, we are told that the creative genius and tax optimiser Vivienne Westwoood will be turning up to advise Quito’s fashionistas. Rumours that Assange will be appearing in Zoolander 3 are unconfirmed…




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Logging company Resolute’s CEO Richard Garneau suing Greenpeace

“A funny thing happened when Greenpeace and allies were forced to account for their claims in court. They started changing their tune. Their condemnations of our forestry practices “do not hew to strict literalism or scientific precision,” as they concede in their latest legal filings. Their accusations against Resolute were instead “hyperbole,” “heated rhetoric,” and “non-verifiable statements of subjective opinion” that should not be taken “literally” or expose them to any legal liability. These are sober admissions after years of irresponsible attacks.”

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