Gove: I’m No Sandal-Wearing Muesli-Munching Vegan

Challenged by Philip Davies, Michael Gove gave a convincing defence of why he is a Conservative in the Commons:

“I’m not sure that members on the opposite benches would agree that I’ve become a sandal-wearing, muesli-munching vegan vapester. I think they would probably say that I’m the same red in tooth and claw blue Tory that I always have been.

And it’s because I’m a conservative, I believe in the rule of law as the foundation stone of our civilisation.

It’s because I’m a conservative, I believe that evil must be punished.

But it’s also because I’m a conservative, and a Christian, that I believe in redemption. And I think the purpose of our prison system is to keep people safe by making people better.”

And Gove spake onto the world, and told the world that “evil must be punished”, and the word was the word and the word was Gove.

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