The Great Socialist Train Robbery

OJ

Socialist luminary and prominent member of the 1% Owen Jones has been spotted nationalising a cup of tea from an unmanned train buffet cart. On the train up to Tory Conference after asking Helen Chandler-Wilde, a Henley councillor, if she was going to make the tea, Owen decided they could wait no longer for the tardy unionised attendant to arrive to sell them a brew. Instead he went behind the counter and made two cuppas himself for the both of them. The people’s Ronnie Biggs…

However as soon as Owen redistributed tea, the heat was around the corner, with his companion informing Guido that:

At this point, the train guard came in and threatened both of us with arrest as he had CCTV. I then declared it as the People’s Revolution of Teamaking against privatised train services. It was all fun and larks, especially Owen’s ‘I haven’t done anything!’ face to the guard, whilst carrying two cups of tea and standing behind the counter.

OJ2

He must have been really Jonesing for a cup of tea!

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