Readers of Guido’s Sun on Sunday column will be dismayed to hear that turnout for the Lib Dems Conference Bisexual Flashmob wasn’t as high as one would expect from such an esteemed event. Despite their calls for ‘all bi, pan and multisexual people’ to join them at Bournemouth Pier, it appears that only a few dozen managed to attend, with even Simon Hughes opting to give the event a miss.

If any fewer had turned out, the attendance figure would have been almost bi-nary…