Daylight Rubbery! Condoms in Venezuela Cost $755

Retailers in Venezuela will soon be wrapping up their businesses as the price of condoms in the joyless socialist dystopia climax at $755 a pack. The population is split and the secret police have been unsheathed to restore order, accusing businesses of running Trojan hoarding operations. “The country is so messed up that now we have to wait in line even to have sex,” says a frustrated Jonatan “Johnny” Montilla, while Jhonatan “Johnny” Rodriguez complains that abortion is illegal: “without condoms we can’t do anything“. Just the tip of the unrest. Time to pull out?


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Councillor John Thomas, Keith Vaz’s Leicester East Constituency Labour Party Chairman says…

“This is great disappointment to me, realising that I have spent over 30 years of my life working for a party that I now know that I have nothing in common with. This is not the party I joined, the party for decent working people. I can no longer follow the clown that leads the Labour Party, he is heavily influenced by the Trotskyite Len McCluskey and is now as the Hoki Coki leader, in out, and shake it all about he has turned this great party into a laughing stock.”

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