Guido’s Fashion Tips: Tory Conference Special

George Osborne’s “footballers that look like lesbians” haircut has gone mainstream. Dan Hodges couldn’t take his eyes off it during his speech:

“None of it mattered. No one was listening to a single word. Because we were all staring at the top of George Osborne’s head. At least I was. Roughly between the crown of his skull and the top of his eyebrows, something was just lying there. The Chancellor was talking about exports to China and all I could think was: “George, you’ve got something sitting on your head”. I was actually on the verge of jumping up and shouting a warning until I realised. The thing sitting on top of his head was his hair.

Not ordinary hair. Entirely new hair. As if someone had reached down, lifted off his old, bog-standard politico’s cut, thrown it in the bin, and stapled something entirely different in its place. This usurper hair was quite hard to describe. Imagine if you woke up and all your hair had mysteriously fallen forward. Think of those pictures you’ve seen of iron filings being attracted towards a magnet. The Chancellor’s hair appeared to have become magnetised.”

Osborne SpAds point out the similarities between their boss’ new hair and that of their new colleague Neil O’Brien.

In the interests of gender balance following this blog’s fashion reports on Miliband last week, Guido brings you Theresa May’s outstanding tartan suit worn during her speech this afternoon:

Och.




Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

Jeremy Corbyn:

“I’m not a defender or supporter of ISIS.”

Sponsors

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.

Facebook

Updates: Who’s Standing? Who’s Standing Down? Updates: Who’s Standing? Who’s Standing Down?
Banks Bottles It Banks Bottles It
Corbynista Unfurls “Farron Hates Gays” Placard Corbynista Unfurls “Farron Hates Gays” Placard
Esther McVey for Tatton Esther McVey for Tatton
Zac Back? Zac Back?
UKIP’s Islamo-Banifesto UKIP’s Islamo-Banifesto
Karen Danczuk Seeks Selection in Bury Karen Danczuk Seeks Selection in Bury
Corbyn and Sturgeon At Same Event Corbyn and Sturgeon At Same Event
Sunday Shows Sunday Shows
Tories Mistakenly Share Private Conference Call PIN with Opposition Tories Mistakenly Share Private Conference Call PIN with Opposition
Len and Seamus’s Champaign Celebration Len and Seamus’s Champaign Celebration
Campaign Report: 48 Days To Go Campaign Report: 48 Days To Go
Campaign Report: 49 Days to Go Campaign Report: 49 Days to Go
Listen: Dawn Butler Car Crash Interview Listen: Dawn Butler Car Crash Interview
Manifesto Lookahead: Six Tory Policies in Peril Manifesto Lookahead: Six Tory Policies in Peril
McVey for Upminster? McVey for Upminster?
Watch: Corbyn Crowd Boos and Shouts Down ITV Question Watch: Corbyn Crowd Boos and Shouts Down ITV Question
Coalition of the Others Still Behind Tories Coalition of the Others Still Behind Tories
NEC Swerves Corbyn Loyalty Pledge NEC Swerves Corbyn Loyalty Pledge
Watch: Barry Gardiner Loses It on Sky News Watch: Barry Gardiner Loses It on Sky News