Self-confessed teen fondler Mike Hancock says he is too ill to be investigated or face a court. His illness means he doesn’t turn up for parliament much either, he has spoken in zero debates this year and attended well under half of the votes. It hasn’t however stopped him from clocking up the hours as a councillor down in Portsmouth. This summer he claimed over £4,000 as his allowance for 80 hours a month as a councillor down on the south coast. Lucky them…