Cat Jokes

Yesterday’s catflap has prompted speculation about whether or not Cameron is or was going to use the line “The Liberals used to shoot your dog…now they steal your cat!”

Guido first reported the wisecrack being overheard in the conference bar on Monday, learning only later that Dave had used the very same line in a private speech to party bigwigs very recently.

If Dave is short of a line from the speech as a result, Guido has a few he could chuck in. Dave should praise IDS lavishly for the work he is doing on welfare reform, as the conference audience inevitably gives a clap and cheer he could throw out the line “unlike other parties, in this party we cheer rather than boo our former leaders”. Maybe some light-hearted reference to Catflap should be worked in: “In cabinet Ken Clarke told me that a policy proposal we were discussing was incompatible with EU law, Theresa May said we had nothing to worry about so long as we kept the Downing Street cat…” We’re here all week, have a canape…




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Jeremy Corbyn told by veteran Jewish MP Margaret Hodge…

“You’re a f***ing anti-aemite and a racist”

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