Budget Day Winners and Losers
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Winners:
- Job providing corporations.
- Internet Service Providers.
- Business start-ups in northern cities.
- Sheffield and the “Nick Clegg Memorial Enterprise Zone”.
- Motorists.
- Scientists.
- Local councillors and their £100m to spend on potholes.
- Charities – 10% death tax cut if money is given away.
Losers:
- Smokers.
- Private jet users.
- Tax avoiders.
- Councils and their frozen tax.
- Nondoms.
- Tree huggers – green belt planning permission up for auction.
- Sleepy Ken Clarke.
- George Osborne’s throat.
- Whoever came up with last year’s growth figures.
- Ed Miliband’s press team who sent the speech out before Red Ed had floundered through it with whole sections changed.
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