Guide to Expense Lies

Guido’s guide to the lies you will be hearing:

It has since been corrected– I knew it was going to come out and it was such a blatant fiddle that I realised I had to repay the fraudulently claimed money before it came out.

The Fees Office approved the payment – the Fees Office always take the word of “honourable” members.  They always make the payment without question.

It was a clerical error” – it was a small fiddle.

Lessons have been learned – we have got away with it, but we won’t do it again.

We need to have two homes to do our job properly– why stay in a hotel when we can build a property portfolio at the public’s expense?

Claims were made in good faith– we have always got away with it in the past.

It was within the rules” – MPs make the rules to suit themselves. MPs are  lawmakers, judge and jury.  It is a joke at our expense.  They really are almost all at it.  Now we can see…




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Quote of the Day

Boris Johnson was shown a trophy monkey head as he toured a room of illegally-poached animals seized by Scotland Yard. He said:

“What’s this poor chap here? Faint air of a … Labour backbencher.”

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