Mrs Fawkes laughed at the news, she has been trying to get her husband home early for years. Guido attributes his shameful behavior to excess alcohol and an early reading of P J O’Rourke’s Republican Party Reptile*.
Thanks to all those of you who sent best wishes and to the not at all obsessed T** I****** for turning up to offer, errm, support in the public gallery. Having demurred to the offer of an alcohol treatment program, Guido will continue to drink and now be chauffeur-driven home early.
*The Platform of the Republican Party Reptiles:
“I think our agenda is clear. We are opposed to: government spending, Kennedy kids, seat-belt laws, busing our children anywhere other than Yale, trailer courts near our vacation homes, all tiny Third World countries that don’t have banking secrecy laws, aerobics, the UN, taxation without tax loopholes, and jewelry on men. We are in favor of: guns, drugs, fast cars, free love (if our wives don’t find out), a sound dollar, and a strong military with spiffy uniforms. There are thousands of people in America who feel this way, especially after three or four drinks. If all of us would unite and work together, we could give this country. . . well, a real bad hangover.”
Of course there is nothing unusual about tagging for a blogger…