Pick of the Stories

The Guardian links to Guido’s Bogey Man video. The Sun says Gordon’s popularity has nose-dived.

The Telegraph “missed the nose-picking bits, and wiping one’s fingers on the back of one’s tie afterwards. (Found them on the internet, though. Yuck.)” Tom Utley in the Mail ask us to imagine Cameron picking his nose on the frontbench.

Guido so enjoyed the best Friday Caption Contest (below) in a long time, he is almost moved to breach with tradition and award a T-shirt. Almost…

From a co-conspirator comes this post-budget joke –

Sarah Brown’s mother responded to an hysterical phone call from her daughter by dashing to Downing Street. She arrived to find her beloved daughter weeping copiously and nursing a black eye. “I don’t know what’s come over Gordon” she sobbed, “I was helping him get ready for work and I asked him if he’d got a clean hanky and he said ‘Not you as well you two faced bitch’ and punched me in the face.”



Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

IDS responds to Juncker’s pints analogy earlier:

“Mr Juncker knows a little bit more about the bar than perhaps many of us do.”

Sponsors

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.
Sir Cover-Up, Sir Craig and the Curious Case of His Memoirs Sir Cover-Up, Sir Craig and the Curious Case of His Memoirs
Alun Cairns’ Tippy-Toes Pose Alun Cairns’ Tippy-Toes Pose
Pidcock Publicly Owned Pidcock Publicly Owned
Young Labour: Leave NATO, Abolish the City and Reject Two-State Solution Young Labour: Leave NATO, Abolish the City and Reject Two-State Solution
Salmond and Tasmina’s Boozy City Break Salmond and Tasmina’s Boozy City Break
Sunday Show Highlights Sunday Show Highlights
Tory MP’s Two Nicknames for Hammond Tory MP’s Two Nicknames for Hammond
Sadiq: “I’m an Uber Man” Sadiq: “I’m an Uber Man”
Tom Brake’s Epic Legatum Whinge Tom Brake’s Epic Legatum Whinge
Juncker: Thanks For Saving Us in The War, Now You Must Pay Juncker: Thanks For Saving Us in The War, Now You Must Pay
Tom Brake’s Epic Legatum Whinge Backfires Tom Brake’s Epic Legatum Whinge Backfires
Starmer Admits Public Clueless as to Labour’s Brexit Policy Starmer Admits Public Clueless as to Labour’s Brexit Policy
Melania Sports Sam Cam’s Cefinn Melania Sports Sam Cam’s Cefinn
Mounting Buzzfeed Losses as Staff Salaries Average £60,000 Mounting Buzzfeed Losses as Staff Salaries Average £60,000
Vince Welcomes LibDems’ Harvey Weinstein Back Into Fold Vince Welcomes LibDems’ Harvey Weinstein Back Into Fold
74% Say No Deal Better Than A Bad Deal 74% Say No Deal Better Than A Bad Deal
Mail Calls on May to Sack Hammond Mail Calls on May to Sack Hammond
Gallery Guido’s PMQs Sketch Gallery Guido’s PMQs Sketch
“Grunter” Osborne Works Out at Beckham’s £295-a-Month Gym “Grunter” Osborne Works Out at Beckham’s £295-a-Month Gym
BBC Head of News Runners and Riders BBC Head of News Runners and Riders