Baby Talk

Blame the baby is a tactic Guido uses himself. Mislaid the keys? Tell the wife “the baby has hidden the keys again”. Hungover from hell and your morning meeting enquires as to why you are unshaven and cross-eyed, “baby is teething…”

A hungover Charles Kennedy used it when he couldn’t figure out the details of his own manifesto policy on local government finance at a press conference.

Had a covert meeting at home with Tom Watson, public instigator of the plot to destabilise your rival, the day before the plot was launched? Tell them “he came to see baby Fraser”.

Caught by a photographer laughing your tits off in the back of a car leaving Downing Street when the plot was executed? “I was laughing and joking about the baby.”

Tip offs: 0709 284 0531

Quote of the Day

Dominic Raab wrote in his letter of resignation…

“This is, at its heart, a matter of public trust,” he told the PM, concluding: “I cannot reconcile the terms of the proposed deal with the promises we made to the country in our manifesto at the last election… I believe that the regulatory regime proposed for Northern Ireland presents a very real threat to the integrity of the United Kingdom. I cannot support an indefinite backstop arrangement, where the EU holds a veto over our ability to exit…”


Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.