Its 4am in the morning and a crazed redhead assaults her Eastenders soap star husband allegedly. The police take her away. A great Sun front-page story.

Is she fit to edit a national newspaper? Will she write about “My ***** and ***** shame?” There will, Guido suspects, be a seat going spare at the 50th Women of the Year Lunch today. Redheads do have a temper…

UPDATE: Apparently they were earlier out on the piss commiserating with Blunkett. You couldn’t make it up.