The disgusting of Tory Tunbridge Wells tonight select their candidate to succeed Archie Norman who steps down at the next election. Steve Barclay is apparently favourite. Until now…

Recess Monkey’s Fair Trade banana campaign EDM has five signatures and his website address is in the text. Its such transparently sordid product placement advertising. That the Mother of Parliaments is reduced to this…

Ms Fortier, who had a three-year affair with the divorced 57-year-old Sheffield Brightside MP, is currently pregnant with her second child and is due to give birth early next year. Lawyers for Ms Fortier, 44, are said to have been contacted by the Home Secretary, who reportedly wants DNA tests to prove whether he is the father of both William and the child she is carrying.

But friends of Mr Quinn described the apparent legal move as “fanciful” and one told the paper: “If he (Mr Blunkett) wishes to go to court with his claim over William, he is in for a very large shock. “We don’t know why he thinks he is William’s father, but he is wrong.”

Looks like a job for the CSA. Ooops, maybe not… Its a job for Fathers4Justice!

I fear this whole jape, as fun as it is, is doomed. As soon as I saw that Harold Pinter was supporting it, I knew. He has been wrong about everything since the 1960s, and usually on the losing side in any political match.

Conspiracy theorists may wish to hypothesise why today the http://www.impeachblair.org/ website is down, on the day the motion is to be tabled.

Tony Banks is retiring from parliament. He did very well to survive in politics as long as he did with his sense of humour.

I will miss him.