Ripefig – has a stonking £14,928.35 and it seems to rise by about 30% per day – how you ask? Well somebody bought a shed load of Virginia Bottomley and she jumped 50%. You would of thought that now Ripefig has got a real job, if you can call public affairs real, he wouldn’t have time to day-trade MPs.

Jamesw is on £5,685.15, jamesgraham £4,849.62, Guido Fawkes £4,451.71, spicer has a respectable £3,476.24. The rest of you don’t seem to have grasped the necessity to day-trade rather than invest and hold.

Recess Monkey on £878.40 emails to point out that his site gives the most referrals to here and tell me he is “getting bored with Polidex – largely because I’m so crap at it.” OK my parliamentary primate, I get the hint. Shhhsh, here’s the tip – don’t tell anyone else or there will be a scandal – David Cameron, Deputy Chairman of the Conservative Party, is a buy today…. nudge, nudge, wink, wink…