Blair Heart Flutters

Story on CBS that Blair to undergo operation for “Heart Flutters”

UPDATE: He is to undergo a catheter ablation. Nothing to worry about. See here. If it was me I’d be shitting myself – involves numbing the groin, wire catheters in your groin. It can be heated -STOP I DO NOT WANT TO KNOW ANY MORE.
UPDATE: 1/300 chance of death.

UPDATE: Tells Marr “Will not serve fourth term” – Doh!
UPDATE: “Brown in danger of laughinging to death” denied.

Sunday Times Leaker

Police have questioned a 23 year-old woman from the cabinet office in connection with the theft of documents. I hope she is innocent. The Sunday Times has been getting loads of government-embarrassing scoops of late. Such as the change to the compilation of NHS productivity figures to make them more productive, the civil service attack on No. 10 spin etc. (Could someone email or voicemail Guido her name – we won’t reveal the source.)

Milburn Sends an Uncoded Message – Why?

In a code that Guido has managed to decipher, Alan Milburn said it would be ‘an enormous privilege’ to lead the party. That suggestion pisses off supporters of the Chancellor, who regard their man as having bagsied the top job whenever it becomes available. ‘It would be an enormous privilege to be Labour leader, but there isn’t a vacancy’, Mr Milburn said at a fringe event last night, adding: ‘Who knows what the future is going to bring?’

Tough code eh? Are the Blairites deliberately using Milburn to wind up Brown, to focus his ire away from Blair?

F****** Fox Banned

The League Against Cruel Sports’ fox puppet give-away has been banned by Labour’s conference authorities in case it incites the hunt protestors. (Guido is not making this up – check the link.) Delegates who bought fox puppets from the League yesterday are having them confiscated when their bags are searched on arrival and have been informed that they can have them back at the end of today.

So it was nothing at all to do with a drunk the night before last pursuing a horrified Cherie up the hotel stairs with a fox puppet on his hand. Nothing at all.
UPDATE: Police have now given permission for the League Against Cruel Sports to bring their “provocative” Basil Brush-style toys into the conference centre – only nobody has bothered to tell the Group 4 security guards who are continuing with their “only doing my job” antics.

Kilroy woz ‘ere

AN online poll asking readers to vote for the best candidate for Prime Minister has been scrapped – after Robert Kilroy-Silk came top. The Ultra-Thatcherite Bruges Group, a Euro-sceptic think-tank, withdrew the results from its website saying they had been “sabotaged”.

Demonstrations Most Newsworthy thing at Labour Conference



Iraq & Fox hunting are the serious issues deserving nude demonstrators and Iraqi Coursing Club jokers. Rely on Guido for the important news. Oh, Blair bored on about not being sorry for arresting Saddam. “I’m like any other human being, as fallible and as capable of being wrong. ” Say it ain’t so Tony?

Straw: “It was quite dark..”

Oh there is so much I’m tempted to pun, so much, so difficult to restrain myself. Particularly following lunch…

Mr Straw shook the dictator’s hand during a reception for South African President Thabo Mbeki and was filmed by a BBC Newsnight team which was following him around the UN. The footage was broadcast last night and the Foreign Secretary said later: “Because it was quite dark in that corner I was being pushed towards shaking hands with somebody just as a matter of courtesy and then it transpired it was President Mugabe.”

Brown its all “tittle-tattle”

Excellent, tittle-tattle is my speciality. Guido’s bull-shit detector has been flashing red as the comrade’s conference kicked off. Blair telling Frostie it’s all nonsense and soap opera, Brown this morning saying taxes had not gone up and the general secretary of the Labour Party attacking “those people in the political elite who would rather that politics was left to them.”

One bit of rare honesty came from Margaret Hodge, admitting that many traditional Labour supporters are racist and that the government must no longer send mixed messages out of fear of losing their support. She didn’t say they wear appalling shell-suits and some of them don’t even know how to use a knife and fork properly, but you knew what she meant.


Noticeable lack of speakers using the word “comrade” – where have all the socialists gone?

Tony Clarke MP – Liar and Hooligan

You read it here last week. Northampton South’s Labour MP Tony Clarke has admitted that he was involved in “minor hooliganism”. He was a young Inter-City-Firm thug. By ‘minor’ he presumably means he didn’t stab anyone. So when last he week he denied being an ICF thug, he was LYING.
Why did he try to Aitken his way out of the story, instead of saying “I was young and foolish but that was then and now I’m an MP.” – (the Dubya defence). Could it be perhaps that he is just another lying politician? Swing required to lose seat: 0.90% so I feel comfortable in predicting the phrase “TORY GAIN” will be the last word’s he hears as an MP on election night.

UPDATE
: Hearing rumours that he is to announce his resignation from the Northampton Town Supporters’ Trust board.

The Boris Backlash Starts Here

Let me be the first to say I’m getting fed up with Boris. He has now started his own blog, to go with his Spectator editorship, occasional quiz show appearance, assorted bits of journalism, fan club, cross party following and safe seat. That nice-guy act isn’t fooling me Boris…

Lord Razzle Dazzles

Lord Razzle got a cheer at the Lib Dem conference by telling the beardies and wooly hat wearers that the Tories would never form a majority government again. I suggest he pops down the bookies and cleans up laying bets for optimistic Tories – Labour Party 1/4, Conservative Party 3/1 Liberal Democrat Party 50/1.

Hunt Protestors : Eleanor Harris interviewed by police

Miss Harris, research assistant to Norfolk MP Henry Bellingham, was interviewed by detectives from Scotland Yard on Saturday about her meeting with protestor Otis Ferry. She had a drink with him in the House two days before the Chamber invasion. Mr Bellingham has not been questioned by the police. Rumour is that other Westminster pass holders are likely to be questioned.

Gordon is an Orphan

BBC: Brown’s mother has died.

Bravo! Bellingham’s Belle is the ‘Insider’

The Eastern Daily Press got the scoop

Norfolk MP Henry Bellingham emphatically denied yesterday that a member of his staff was a mole who gave inside help to the hunt protesters who burst into the House of Commons on Wednesday.

Mr Bellingham said he had spoken to his aides at Westminster – a secretary and a researcher – and both had denied giving any assistance to the demonstrators. Bellingham accused the police of “thuggery” and “criminal assault”, “The police were very heavy-handed and foolish. There was high-spiritedness but it wasn’t dangerous or endangering lives. Officers did not have to launch a full baton charge.”

But I’m told that his assistant, Eleanor Harris, was ‘duped’ into giving Otis Ferry a tour of the Commons last week. Really. Its not like the Bellingham family doesn’t have previous form for causing trouble in the House, in 1812 John Bellingham, Henry’s ancestor, shot the prime minister, Spencer Perceval through the heart as he was walking across the lobby. An act to be fully supported methinks – Perceval was an extreme anti-Catholic bigot. Methinks I like these Bellinghams.

[Bizarrely, in the 1997 general election, one of Henry Bellingham’s opponents was Roger Percival, a descendant of Spencer Perceval.]
UPDATE: BBC has now picked up on the story. 3 hours after me.
UPDATE: Mirror has now picked up on the story. 3 days after this was originally posted.

New Modern Tory Image – ‘Commie’

Now I’m not a Charlotte Street brand ‘n advertising guru like Lord Saatchi, but the re-branding of the Tories seems a little politically retro. It looks even a tad Soviet to me. Or is that deliberate? Compare these images. It is to be officially unveiled at the upcoming Tory Party conference, I’m not sure how it will go down with the true believers…

“Insider” – Telephone Trace

Otis Ferry and the rest of the invaders’ phone records are being trawled to see if they had any contact with a particular person in the Palace of Westminster. You have been warned!



The arrested were Otis Ferry, 21-year-old son of the rock star Bryan Ferry, who is joint master of the South Shropshire hunt, Luke Tomlinson, a polo player for England and close friend of princes William and Harry, John Holliday, a huntsman from Ledbury; David Redvers, a stud owner at Hartpury, Gloucestershire; Robert Thame, a polo player; Andrew Elliot; Nick Wood and the point-to-point jockey Richard Wakeham. They claim they breezed in unchallenged “dressed up like builders from Village People”.
UPDATE: The London Evening Standard has more on Otis’ Village People Hunt Protestors

Gotcha



With consummate timing the Currant Bun exposes the shambolic security at the Mother of Parliaments. Good journalism – something that Luisa Baldini, a reporter on the BBC One O’Clock News might learn from, for it was she who received the invasion tip-off call on Wednesday morning. Andrew Marr, the BBC’s Political Editor, told viewers: “I have to say that one of the BBC knew about it and didn’t think it terribly important. Another great hit for us.”

Super Mack to the rescue

Europhobia reports the heroic witty efforts of Sir Patrick Cormack MP

By this time, and we’re talking about a few seconds after the incident began, MPs had snapped into action. They were giving the young men some very cross looks. Only Sir Patrick Cormack decided to become a have-a-go hero, and tried to grab one youth in an armlock… “My goodness, I thought, if they had been terrorists armed with machine guns, some of the least known MPs in the country would be lying dead by now.'” Sir Patrick addressed one of the youths. “Get out! I am furious! This is disgraceful!”

Sir Patrick Cormack MP is a firm supporter of hunting (but not of violent protesting).

Mentally ill will be allowed to sit as MPs

The Evening Standard reports that the rule that bans the mentally ill from sitting as MPs is to be relaxed in a shake-up of mental health laws.

An outright bar on MPs “of unsound mind” will be replaced by a test that allows them to carry on so long as they are able to turn up at Westminster. The change would allow politicians suffering severe mental illness to remain in the Commons for years, even if they could not understand debates and were undergoing compulsory treatment in the community. The proposal is part of the draft Mental Health Bill unveiled by Health Secretary John Reid last week. So they are finally making it official.

Hunt is on for the “Inside Man”

Eight people were held by the Serjeant-at-Arms and handed over to the police last night, including Otis Ferry, Brian Ferry’s son, the country’s youngest hunt master who is said to have masterminded the operation. The police and the Serjeant-at-Arms, eager to find a scapegoat for yesterday’s security breach, are looking for the Inside Man who assisted the protestors to gain entry and probably guided or advised them how to get through the labyrinth of corridors and stairwells to reach the Commons chamber around the back of the speakers chair, thereby avoiding security.[…] Read the rest

+ READ MORE +



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