Where’s Gordon?™ tracks Gordon’s campaign trail as he tries to shore up the Labour vote in Scotland.

UPDATE : Notice something weird about this picture? Look at Gordon’s feet. He has tucked his trouser leg into his sock. The man Polly Toynbee calls an “intellectual giant” has trouble dressing himself.

Well at least he isn’t picking his nose in front of the kids…

Guido is saddened to learn that Friday’s untreated massive sewage discharge by Scottish Water into the Firth of the Forth, flowed past Gordon’s North Queensferry/Fife home this warm weekend.

Don’t forget the updated interactive Where’s Gordon?™ keeps track Gordon’s campaign moves.

Yesterday Gordon was, once again, not next to Tony at PMQs. He seems ever more unwilling to attend PMQs as the preciousss gets nearer to his grasp. Is it because he just can’t stand Tony being PM any more, or because he knows Cameron will poke fun at him and Tony?

Where was he? Check the Where’s Gordon?™ interactive map.

The big news is that on the day the house debates a no-confidence motion in Gordon Brown inflation news busts the pound through the psychological $2 barrier. Raising mortgage hike worries and putting exporters under extra pressure. Mervyn King, the Governor of the Bank of England, is obliged to write a letter explaining the situation and the proposed remedy. Guido suspects Gordon wrote to him first…Of course that still doesn’t explain why the other major European economies have lower inflation than the UK, after all, don’t they pay the same price for oil as we do?

Blaming the oil price is convenient – it means it has nothing to do with Gordon’s handling of the fiscal side of things. Gilt prices are falling, dragging long-term rates up because the City is increasingly wary of taking on even more government debt, despite Gordon’s off-balance-sheet manipulation of the PSBR. If he was a corporate CEO hiding debt off the books as he is, he would be looking at doing jail-time…

Where’s Gordon?™ Day 15 : At the Treasury, writing buck passing letters to the Governor of the Bank of England.

The Where’s Gordon?™ map goes transatlantic.

What has he been up to today and yesterday? Forgot to update the interactive Where’s Gordon?™ map. In the comments please…

Click on the map* for the big interactive Where’s Gordon?™ map. Still missing a few days when Guido was either not paying attention or in the back of a gondola. So if helpful co-conspirators could post in the comments if you know where he was over Easter and on April 4 please. Thanks.

UPDATE : Added missing bits with the help of co-conspirators, presumably he just sat at home on Easter weekend (7th to 9th) brooding and snapping at the wife and kids.

Today Gordon was off to Gleneagles, promising to “give every child in the world a better chance – freed from poverty and liberated by education.”

A few months ago UNICEF reported that British children were the unhappiest in the Western world. Youth unemployment is higher now than it was in 1997. 15% of British school-leavers are functionally illiterate. Bit early to be claiming “mission accomplished” at home?

N.B. Could a co-conspirator let Guido know where Gordon was yesterday? Wasn’t paying attention and will need it for the Where’s Gordon?™ interactive mapping thingy being developed.

Here are some pictures of recent difficult PMQ sessions for Blair. At many of them Cameron’s attack focussed on the Chancellor. Notice anything?

He is never there. Pension grab – not his idea – it was civil servants, CBI, former Chancellor’s twentysomething special adviser called, errmm, Cameron. Anyone but Gordon…

Smith Institute – 167 political meetings at his place organised by his best friend - nothing to do with Gordon.

Watch the local election campaign, if it looks bad for Labour you can bet he won’t be taking responsibility. He’ll be out of sight, out of mind – he hopes. So Guido is asking the co-conspirators to trail him and email in sightings of him on the campaign trail for the next month. Where’s Gordon? is the question to be answered – the blog will have an interactive map of his daily movements up and running soon. More fun than pavement policy analysis…