Romney Not Running

The Daily Beast exclusive that Mitt Romney is to run for President again will be staying exclusive. Romney says:

After putting considerable thought into making another run for president, I’ve decided it is best to give other leaders in the Party the opportunity to become our next nominee…

I’ve been asked, and will certainly be asked again if there are any circumstances whatsoever that might develop that could change my mind. That seems unlikely. Accordingly, I’m not organizing a PAC or taking donations; I’m not hiring a campaign team.

I encourage all of you on this call to stay engaged in the critical process of selecting a Republican nominee for President. Please feel free to sign up on a campaign for a person who you believe may become our best nominee.

I believe a Republican winning back the White House is essential for our country, and I will do whatever I can to make that happen.

To all my supporters, friends and family who worked both tirelessly and loyally to support my campaigns in the past, I will always be deeply appreciative. What you have already done is a tribute to your patriotism. We are overwhelmed and humbled by your loyalty to us, by your generosity of spirit, and by your friendship. God bless you all.

Read the statement in full here. Stupid idea in the first place.

Sorry Obama Couldn’t Be Bothered, But Here’s James Taylor

John Kerry reaffirmed his status as international diplomacy’s leading pillock this afternoon with his excruciatingly embarrassing apology to France. After no senior American official could be bothered to attend the unity rally in Paris last week, John Kerry stowed James Taylor in his hand luggage for his visit to the French capital. Taylor was paraded at a press conference to sing “You’ve got a friend…” Which wasn’t at all awkward…

Dave: Obama Does Call Me Bro

The big news from Dave’s trip to the States: confirmation that the leader of the free world does call him “bro”.

“It’s normally Barack and David, I hasten to add… well, it’s been said.”

“Call me bro…”

via BBC

Look Mehdi, US Cartoon Mocks 9/11 And No One Gets Shot

“I’m fed up with the hypocrisy of the free speech fundamentalists,” says Mehdi Hasan as he finally gives his two cents on the Paris terror attack. He asks: “Has your publication, for example, run cartoons mocking the Holocaust? No? How about caricatures of the 9/11 victims falling from the twin towers? I didn’t think so (and I am glad it hasn’t).”

Actually, Mehdi, US cartoons constantly make jokes about 9/11, and pretty mainstream, much-loved ones too. Here are just three such gags from Family Guy:

And look, a “cartoon mocking the Holocaust”:

And yet no one reached for their Kalashnikov…

‘ISIS’ Hack US Military During Obama Security Speech

image

Cyber jihad!

How Republicans Won the Senate

The GOP easily won the six seats they needed to take the Senate in last night’s mid-terms, Mashable’s Lego senate GIF shows you how they did it. Everything is awesome…

Don’t tell the lefties, but the GOP last night elected:

  • The youngest woman
  • First black woman Republican
  • First Southern black Senator
  • First woman from Iowa

Rising star Joni Ernst becomes Iowa’s first female senator, helped by her unique experience of “how to cut pork”:

Squeal!

Democrats Bullying Voters With Big Data

Is this rather menacing letter being pushed through doors stateside evidence of the Democrats resorting to bullying voters with big data? Worth having a read of this passage from Sasha Issenberg’s “The Victory Lab”, the seminal text on Obama’s digital campaigning. Issenberg writes that the Democrats previously considered the exact same tactic, but “no candidate or group wanted to be associated with a tactic that looked a lot like bullying – and a bit like blackmail”.

This time round it seems they’ve decided to play nasty…

Bush Aide Live Tweets 9/11

Former White House press secretary Ari Fleischer has spent the day live-tweeting a remarkable moment by moment account of his experience of 9/11 with George W. Bush:

[View the story “Bush Aide Live Tweets 9/11” on Storify]

Farage Stands With Rand

The potential next leader of the free world… and Rand Paul.[…]

+ READ MORE +

WATCH: John McCain Does the Robot

Would we be seeing heads cut off on Iraqi street corners had this man been Commander in Chief?[…]

+ READ MORE +

WATCH: Robin Williams on Iraq

Robin Williams’ three minute history of Clinton, Dubya, Iraq and Obama was pretty funny (some strong language):

RIP.[…]

+ READ MORE +

Awkward Ed Miliband White House Moments

Ed arrived at the White House last night hoping President Obama might take a moment out of dealing with several world crises to help him with his election campaign:

20140722-080938-29378868.jpg

The Labour leader got his 25 minute ‘brush-by’ with the President. […]

+ READ MORE +

OZBOT VERSUS ANDROGENOID OZBOT VERSUS ANDROGENOID
“Fat Cats For EU” “Fat Cats For EU”
“CHEATED” LIBDEM PICTURED CAMPAIGNING ON BATTLE BUS “CHEATED” LIBDEM PICTURED CAMPAIGNING ON BATTLE BUS
CHRISTINE HAMILTON HIRED ON THE PUBLIC PAYROLL CHRISTINE HAMILTON HIRED ON THE PUBLIC PAYROLL
CONSERVATIVES IN: SPOT THE DIFFERENCE CONSERVATIVES IN: SPOT THE DIFFERENCE
HULL UNIVERSITY THIRD TO DISAFFILIATE FROM NUS HULL UNIVERSITY THIRD TO DISAFFILIATE FROM NUS
CAMERON’S AIRFARE FABLE CAMERON’S AIRFARE FABLE
TELEGRAPH BLOODBATH: NEW JOBS CULL UNDERWAY TELEGRAPH BLOODBATH: NEW JOBS CULL UNDERWAY
CCHQ FREEZE MPS AND ASSOCIATIONS OUT OF VOTE SOURCE CCHQ FREEZE MPS AND ASSOCIATIONS OUT OF VOTE SOURCE
OSBORNE MISSED BORROWING TARGET BY EVEN MORE THAN PREVIOUSLY THOUGHT OSBORNE MISSED BORROWING TARGET BY EVEN MORE THAN PREVIOUSLY THOUGHT
POLICE INVESTIGATING SHADOW MINISTER OVER ELECTION EXPENSES POLICE INVESTIGATING SHADOW MINISTER OVER ELECTION EXPENSES
TOOTING BY-ELECTION CAMPAIGN KICKS OFF IN BATTERSEA TOOTING BY-ELECTION CAMPAIGN KICKS OFF IN BATTERSEA
ELECTORAL COMMISSION ON JOCK-‘COPTER CAMPAIGN ELECTORAL COMMISSION ON JOCK-‘COPTER CAMPAIGN
STURGEON DUCKS CHOPPER QUESTION STURGEON DUCKS CHOPPER QUESTION
NUS CHIEF EXECUTIVE PAID FIVE TIMES AVERAGE GRADUATE NUS CHIEF EXECUTIVE PAID FIVE TIMES AVERAGE GRADUATE
CORBYN CLAPPED COMMIE LEADER FOR REFUSING TO TOAST THE QUEEN CORBYN CLAPPED COMMIE LEADER FOR REFUSING TO TOAST THE QUEEN
SNP CHOPPER NOT DECLARED PROPERLY SNP CHOPPER NOT DECLARED PROPERLY
SADIQ RAISES EU FLAG ABOVE CITY HALL SADIQ RAISES EU FLAG ABOVE CITY HALL
SAJ ‘PRIVATELY SAID HE WANTED TO LEAVE’ SAJ ‘PRIVATELY SAID HE WANTED TO LEAVE’
CRICK CRICK’D CRICK CRICK’D
EU WANTS CULTURAL QUOTAS ON NETFLIX AND AMAZON PRIME EU WANTS CULTURAL QUOTAS ON NETFLIX AND AMAZON PRIME
LIBDEM WHO COMPLAINED TO POLICE ABOUT TORY ELECTION FRAUD BROKE SPENDING RULES LIBDEM WHO COMPLAINED TO POLICE ABOUT TORY ELECTION FRAUD BROKE SPENDING RULES
LABOUR WON’T ALLOW CONFERENCE DELEGATES TO SELF-IDENTIFY LABOUR WON’T ALLOW CONFERENCE DELEGATES TO SELF-IDENTIFY
WORST BEATLES TRIBUTE BAND EVER WORST BEATLES TRIBUTE BAND EVER
CELEBRITY CONSUMER CHAMPION HITS BACK AT BSE CELEBRITY CONSUMER CHAMPION HITS BACK AT BSE
MOMENTUM REJOICE! ONLY 65% THINK CORBYN NOT READY TO BE PM MOMENTUM REJOICE! ONLY 65% THINK CORBYN NOT READY TO BE PM
TAXPAYER FUNDED ASH LOBBIED GOVERNMENT FOR PLAIN-PACKS TAXPAYER FUNDED ASH LOBBIED GOVERNMENT FOR PLAIN-PACKS
REMAIN’S GILLIAN DUFFY MOMENT REMAIN’S GILLIAN DUFFY MOMENT
NORTHERNERS MOCK “GRIM UP NORTH” BURNHAM NORTHERNERS MOCK “GRIM UP NORTH” BURNHAM
LONG-TERM RISE OF ANTI-POLITICS LONG-TERM RISE OF ANTI-POLITICS