Friday, December 19, 2014

Twitter Bitch Fight of the Week: Oborne v Maguire

Today’s Mirror splashes on “heartless” George Osborne giving his SpAd Rupert Harrison, apparently “one of the chief architects” of the “cruel austerity drive”, a 19% pay rise.

The story very much upset Man of the People Mirror Associate Editor Kevin Maguire, who Peter Oborne has the temerity to speculate is on rather more than Rupert:

Kerching!

Monday, December 8, 2014

Brand ‘Threw Curry Sauce’ at Daily Mail Journalist…
Then Tweeted His Mobile Number to 8.7 Million Followers

How does Russell Brand respond to a journalist asking him a question? By tweeting his mobile number to his 8.7 million followers. Guido has obscured the image, but Brand knows Daily Mail reporter Neil Sears’ phone will be ringing off the hook with nutters bombarding him with calls. Was there an ulterior motive? Guido is told Brand and Sears had a run in last week when the reporter doorstepped him to give him right of reply on a story he was planning on running. Brand then allegedly responded by throwing curry sauce all over him…

Friday, December 5, 2014

Official: No One Cares About #CameronMustGo

The less reality-based elements of the loony left are still banging on at the ‘biased’ media failing to cover a hashtag calling for the PM to step down. Today’s Populus poll offers a more likely reason: no one cares. Not one person in the real world thought it was a story this week:

The final proof it was never news…

Thursday, November 27, 2014

Labour Candidate Posts Full Frontal Vagina Pic on Twitter

Tory MP Karl McCartney appears to have ‘done a Dromey’, in other words ‘favouriting’ a saucy picture on his Twitter account. His Labour opponent’s decision to flag this up, uncensored, to her followers will have had them choking on their lunch:

lucy

Red faces all round…

UPDATE:

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Tin Foil Trickett Strikes Again
Loony Ed Adviser’s Latest Conspiracy Wheeze

Ed Miliband’s new political adviser is in Norman Baker territory with this latest conspiracy theory. Jon Trickett reckons he can explain the lack of press coverage for the  prosaic #CameronMustGo campaign, which was started by an internet loony who claims the Tories are Nazis, and shared by dozens of simpleton Labour MPs. “The official media suppressed any comment,” tin foil Trickett claims, “you won’t have seen anything about it in the mainstream media”. (It’s been covered by the BBC.)

Could it be that Labour supporters tweeting that they don’t like David Cameron is not really that interesting? No, says Trickett, “the press barons and their hired hands fear that their power to control the flow of opinion and information is, daily, slipping away from their hands”. Tell that to the barons at the top of the Daily Mail Group and Telegraph Media Group. Papers owned by both have covered the ‘story’.

Monday, November 24, 2014

Twitter Bitch Fight of the Weekend: Tom Watson v Ivan Lewis

The Labour old guard spent their Sunday afternoons locked in a bruising Red on Red deathmatch. The protagonists: Blairite Shadow Cabinet minister Ivan Lewis and one time Brownite bootboy Tom Watson. The subject: Scottish Labour’s leadership election. The venue: Twitter.

Seconds out!

Alas, Ivan couldn’t quite bring himself to write ‘knifing Blair’…

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Eddie Izzard Returns to Form

eddie[1]Eddie Izzard is a backer of hopeless causes ranging from joining the euro, voting for Ken Livingstone, Gordon Brown, the Yes side in the alternative vote referendum and now of course Ed Miliband. Guido was therefore highly perturbed when Izzard managed to be, for once, on the winning side in the Scottish independence referendum thus devaluing his use as a negative predictive tool. Fear not, all is once again right.

After urging his Twitter followers to vote for the Democrats they had a bad night and the Republicans took control of the Senate…

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

The Guidos: Social Media Hero or Heroine of the Decade

The nominees were:

  • Louise Mensch: For services to international trolling and picking Twitter fights
  • Cllr Karen Danczuk: for selfless services to selfies and feminism
  • Brooks Newmark: for not putting down the loo seat before photographing himself masturbating in the bathroom mirror
  • Aidan Burley: For cultural diversity online and really entering into the whole Olympic spirit

And the winner:

Stay tuned for the rest of the winners throughout the afternoon…

Monday, October 13, 2014

Twitter Mensch Fight of the Week: Nads v Louise

It’s a day ending in ‘y’ so Louise Mensch has been at the internet again, with predictable results.

Round one of this weekend’s transatlantic duel saw her go after Nadine Dorries, who she probably should have known from previous experience is a brave choice of sparring partner.

Seconds out…

K.O. 

If that were not enough, Louise then decided to swing for someone she clearly presumed would be a softer target:

Except Karen is in politics. Elected politics. She is a politician. A Labour councillor, and Louise isn’t, having abandoned her seat. No one has a pop at Mrs D and gets away with it…

Friday, August 22, 2014

Too Many Tweets

Westminster Public Affairs have done their annual Twitter tot up. When they’re not on holiday, the 461 MPs online sent a total of 718,431 tweets in the last year. “Over this twelve-month period MPs spent a combined total of over 115 days (or more than 2774 hours) sending Tweets.” That’s an awful lot of time wasting… 

So who are the biggest blabbermouths?

Well apparently George Galloway – who recently described being an MP as tedious – comes out on top with 16,399 tweets.

The top-Tweeting Conservative MP is Michael Fabricant with 11,311 tweets – some of them costing him a job as the Vice-Chairman of the party.

Shouty-crackers Karl ‘anger management’ Turner is seemingly as much of a gobsh*te online as he in Parliament and on trains, topping iLabour with 12,577.

While Tim Farron’s campaign to convince everyone he is a thoroughly nice bloke, while simultaneously knifing his leader, sees him top the LibDems with 14,741 Tweets.

Wasting time on the internet is meant to be Guido’s job.


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