Monday, June 16, 2014

Battle-Scarred Berger Bag-Carrier Honoured By Liz

Guido would like to offer his warmest congratulations to Sheila Murphy, who was bestowed the honour of becoming a Member of the Most Excellent Order of the British Empire by Her Majesty in the Queen’s Birthday Honours this weekend. A proud political activist, Sheila offered the most selfless of sacrifices to her Labour Party: devoting her life to becoming a parliamentary assistant to Luciana Berger. Presumably the MBE was for services to bravery and professionalism in the face of grave danger. She deserves all the medals…

Monday, June 9, 2014

PICTURE SPECIAL: Farage’s Top Tory Totty

Gordon Brown declared Nigel Farage to represent the best of British during his Press Gallery lunch this afternoon, telling hacks: “Britain wouldn’t be Britain without Farage with a pint in one hand and a mystery lady in the other”. Well now Guido can solve the mystery…

The blonde with her arm draped around the fun-loving UKIP leader in the (above right) photo is Tess Weeks, privately educated (Haberdashers’ Monmouth) the UCL graduate speaks Russian and Italian, she works as a recruitment consultant with Palm Mason in Canary Wharf. She attended the boozy conference in Malta last week in the course of her work. Guido cannot think why a well-lubricated Nige decided to make friends:

No need for Kirsten, the missus, to worry, there was no 3 a.m. walk back to a hotel room this time however. Tess has a boyfriend and says she is a proud supporter of the Conservative Party…

Bags of Fun at Danczuk’s Deli

=

Guido doesn’t normally do free advertising on the blog, but he thought he would make an exception for Danczuk’s Deli. Rochdale’s finest coffee shop has shelves stacked full of traditional baps, toasties, cakes, paninis, soups, salads and a Miliband-trolling “easier to eat” bacon butty which was helpfully launched after an unfortunate incident involving Ed Miliband.

butty

The deli is run by Labour MP Simon Danczuk’s missus Karen, who is also a Labour councillor in the area. For some reason Karen has been racking up Twitter followers in recent weeks…

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

WATCH: Penny Mordaunt’s Loyal Address in Full

Monday, June 2, 2014

Not So Lovely Luciana: You Won’t Like Her When She’s Angry
Bossy Berger Gets Through 15 Staffers Since 2010

Luciana Berger’s colleagues were amused to hear she had hosted a round-table summit on “well-being in the workplace” last week. As Guido revealed in yesterday’s Sun column, not so lovely Luciana’s record as a nightmare boss is the stuff of Westminster legend. Berger has had no fewer than 15 assistants since becoming an MP in 2010. They are: Hadyn Belfield, Eve Byrne, Katherine Thompson, Richard Durber, Jason Keen, Geila Alpion, Kaitlyn Degnen, Joe Fortune, Daniel Whittle, Ryan Jones, David Clinton, Rebecca Rowland, Thomas Caygill, Sarah Mills and Sheila Murphy. One bruised aide tells Guido: “She’s the worst of the lot.” The true number could even be higher, as some staffers may not have lasted long enough to be registered. 

If any current or former staffer who has felt Luciana’s wrath would like to talk about their experience, in complete confidence, they can contact Guido’s new hotline for parliamentary staff who have been bullied in the workplace on 0709 284 0531, or at this email address. Discretion guaranteed…

Who does she think she is, David Ruffley?

UPDATE: Luciana tweets:

Don’t say Guido didn’t warn you…

Monday, May 19, 2014

All Grown Up: Tory MP Recreates Baywatch Pose 15 Years On

charlotte

As a 20 year old lifeguard Charlotte Leslie set hearts racing on the beaches of Cornwall in her red swimming costume. Fifteen years later the Tory MP has recreated her Baywatch pose to raise awareness for the lifesavers who protect our coasts. Any money raised goes to the Bude Surf Lifesaving ClubShe’s still got it…

Friday, May 16, 2014

Charlotte Leslie Makes a Splash

Friday, April 25, 2014

HuffPo Has Photo of Couple Having Sex on Front Page

Editor in Chief of Huffington Post UK Carla Buzasi is not impressed with Time magazine for putting a photo of a scantily-clad Beyonce on their front page:

Meanwhile, on the front page of Carla’s HuffPo UK today, which campaigns against Page 3 remember, viewers are treated to a story headlined Waiting for a bus? Why not have sex? (NSFW picture). Accompanied by a photo of two people actually having sex, which Guido is not republishing since this is a family blog.

Other headlines on HuffPost UK this week include:

 For some reason Carla isn’t tweeting out any of these stories…

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Guy News Special: BBC Three’s Greatest Hits

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Real Life Anti-Sex League Oppose #CheckEmTuesday

Predictable po-faced Twitter bores Political Scrapbook and Stella Creasy are ramping the faux outrage meter, whingeing about the Sun admirably using Page 3 to encourage women to check themselves for signs of breast cancer. As the Sun’s Fabulous magazine team is demonstrating above they are backing CoppaFeel founder Kris Hallenga, who has been diagnosed with incurable breast cancer. Even No More Page 3 are mostly backing the Sun, so it isn’t very sensible for the less popular politically correct elements of the Twittersphere to behave like a real-life 1984 Anti-Sex League, accusing the paper of hijacking her campaign. How many women have ever decided to check themselves for cancer because they read Political Scrapbook?

The Sun’s editor David Dinsmore and Page 3 girls (pictured above) are fully behind this public health initiative. You can read more about the Sun’s campaign here, and check out the CoppaFeel website here.


Seen Elsewhere

Sunday Mirror Should Be Applauded | Sandi Dunn
Hancock in “Labour is Full of Queers” Blunder | Scrapbook
In Farageland | London Review of Books
What About the Mums? | Kathy Gyngell
Tories Send Cameron Clear Message Re Gove | Speccie
Lets Hear it for Theresa May | Allison Pearson
Dave Takes Advantage of Economic Trust | Jonathan Freedland
Cameron’s Kitchen Sink Manifesto | Tim Montgomerie
Dave Promises £7 Billion Tax Cuts | Times
At Last, a Real Tory PM | Mail
Cameron Trades Votes for Economic Credibility | FT


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David Cameron on political promiscuity…

“On May 7 you could go to bed with Nigel Farage and wake up with Ed Miliband. Not one bit of that works for me.”



cynic says:

Can anyone help me? I went on holiday a week ago and returned to find someone has pulled out the stake and Gordon Brown is back and acting as Prime Minister. What did I miss? Has there been a snap election?


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