Tatler’s Intriguing Top Tory Totty

It is seemingly slim pickings for a single girl in Westminster. Tatler’s annual list of London’s most Eligible Bachelors 2010 is out. In the top ten we have one Christopher Myers, presumably going for the lifetime achievement award, and our miniature Member from Penrith, Rory “definitely not a spook” Stewart.

While the the girls might find it tough to win over Mr Myers, Guido is pretty sure both he and Chris are better dancers than Rory:

Form an orderly queue…

(Video courtesy: Sam England, Penrith)

Woolas Staffer Eyes Oldham

Guido is hearing rumours that the bun-fight has already begun to be the Labour candidate in the Oldham by-election and soundings are well underway. One well-placed-red says Shona Woodfine, who has been Phil’s long-suffering bag-carrier, is positively gagging for the nomination. And has made that clear to the party machine…

This wouldn’t be the first time Labour have made such a move, the “Baby of the House” Pamela Nash, who is just 26, took over John Reid’s safe seat having been his special advisor. Woodfine’s chances have to be weakened by her closeness to her disgraced former boss, she was presumably in the campaign office when these leaflets were going out. Apparently that’s not what she is saying though…

UPDATE : Can you read between the ambiguous lines of this Tweet she sent just after this story went up:

Totty Watch: You Spoil Us Ambassador

Meet Tamara Mellon, who flew on the plane to China as one of the PM’s newly appointed Business Ambassadors:

Ms. Mellon will certainly be an asset to the PM on his visit to China, certainly an improvement on Digby Jones…

Exclusive: Dave’s Stylist Goes from CCHQ to the Civil Service

Before this May’s general election CCHQ’s Anna-Maren Ashford was the “Head of Brand Communications” and is credited with styling “Brand Dave”. The former advertising executive was brought in by Steve Hilton from Young & Rubicam to kick out the old Tory torch logo and bring in the huggable tree. The glossy 30 year-old made the right look right.

She successfully helped detoxify the Tories and turn them into the beautiful people…

Post-election she still answers to Hilton and is close to hand in the Cabinet Office should the smooth Brand Dave need further polishing – just nowadays it is at the taxpayers’ expense as a civil servant in Whitehall. Officially she works with the Behavioural Insights Strategy Team known universally across Whitehall as the “Nudge Unit”.

Dave controversially put his personal photographer, Andy Parsons, on the Civil Service payroll, the news that his image stylist has also become a civil servant will infuriate many who will question his priorities…

Totty Watch : Boris Shows His Balls to Four Beautiful Women

With the news that Boris has been kicked out of his family home and is now living in a rented house down the road from his wife and kids, it seems he is not letting women get in the way of his day job. There was barely a sign of distraction when he met an extremely important visiting  international delegation yesterday:

Sometimes Guido wishes he could be the Mayor..

Miliband’s Staffers

Polly Billington – Gatekeeper and PR. Former BBC presenter and SpAd at the Department for Enviroment and Climate Change. (1)

Sadiq Khan – Campaign Manager. Controversial expenses fiddling MP for Tooting.

Lucy Powell – Chief of Staff. Failed PPC. (2)

Katie Myler – Spokesman. Former SpAd to Jacqui Smith, and the daughter News of the Screws editor Colin Myler. (3)

Stewart Wood – Head of Comms. Former Brown Bunker Bod and very close to Ed. (4)

Kenny Young – Press Officer. “Calamity Kenny” just about says it all. (5)

Rachel Kinnock – Events. Keeping it in the family. (6)

Greg Beales – Speechwriter. Highly rated boyfriend of spokesgirl Katie Myler. (7)

Ayesha Hazarika – Speechwriter. Stand up comic and Harman SpAd. (8)

James Morris – Polling and Message. Ally of Democrat and Brown pollster Stan Greenberg.

Alex Smith – Messaging and New Media, though doing diary work too. Editor of LabourList. (9)

Anna Yearly – Bag carrier. (10)

Nirmalee Wanduragala – Researcher. Former SpAd to Rosie Winterton and Fabian. (11)

Calum O’Byrne Mulligan – Researcher. Friends accuse him of being “Stalinist”. (12)

Totty Watch : Bristol Palin Shaking Her Booty

Skip the intro and go to 1 minute and 40 seconds in:

Totty Trumps

It seems the misbehaving MPs feature particularly heavily in the annual Sky News conference season Top Trumps:

This year the “fanciabilty” ranking has caused a few eyebrows. No surprise that the judges (Sir Michael White, Quentin Letts, Sophy Ridge, Paul Waugh, Julia Hartley-Brewer, Iain Dale and Katie Snape) gave pretty boy Zac Goldsmith 100%, but David Miliband on 95%… really?

Coulson’s Five A Day

What is it with Downing Street Heads of Communication? First we had Campbell’s cringe-worthy porno writing career and now Coulson’s getting his kit off. The high pressure atmosphere of a tabloid newsroom is often cited for various misdemeanours concerning […]

+ READ MORE +

Fact Check: Bouncing Bryony Boobs Column

Shock waves have been sent through the national media today by The Telegraph’s Bryony Gordon. Seemingly tasked with making Colonels splutter into their cornflakes, the former 3am Girl this week devoted her entire column to her ample bosom and the […]

+ READ MORE +

Labour’s Lady of the Night

Mandy isn’t the only Labour politician willing to throw in some juicy details in order to flog a few copies. Nottingham councillor and writer Catharine Arnold tells of intriguing past while promoting her new book City of Sin:

“Far

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Balls’s Bungled Pledge

Yesterday Ed Balls made a big song and dance about signing a pledge that all interns should be paid the minimum wage. He even released a video of him and one of his own office interns discussing it. Except that’s […]

+ READ MORE +



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Quote of the Day

William Hague on Tony Blair…

“To the political law that you can’t fool all of the people all of the time he added Blair’s law – that you can make a very serious attempt at it.”

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