Wednesday, December 3, 2014

Everything You Need to Know About the Autumn Statement

Osborne’s Kwasi NHS Spending Pledge

Kwasi Kwarteng isn’t backing down from his comments splashed in the Indy that NHS spending will have to be cut to clear the deficit:

“My general point was that if you’re going to have a serious debate about deficit reduction, everything has to be on the table. Now I’m not saying we’re going to cut the NHS, what I am saying is that there’s a serious deficit problem and you have to start thinking quite radical things if you are serious about dealing with the deficit. The alternative is to keep borrowing money indefinitely.”

Osborne has just announced £3 billion worth of extra cash for the NHS…

Tories Planning Super Secret Surprise Attack

Pssst… Don’t tell anyone but here’s the plan. Tory MPs are very grumpy at the fact they are being kept in Westminster on a three-line whip until close of play tomorrow as there is “important government business to secure”. A Whip’s claim that is for the “Coastal Defences (Clacton & Frinton-0n-Sea) Abolition Order” is believed to be disinformation. In fact – despite obfuscation – it is looking increasingly like a trap.

The consensus is that Osborne is planning to trap Labour with a quick and dirty vote on his plan to put into law the promise to balance Britain’s underlying budget deficit. Shame he didn’t do that on May 7 2010…

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

45% of Satanists Vote Tory

Firefighting the somewhat unfortunate endorsement of UKIP by Nick Griffin, telly’s Suzanne Evans produced the stat of the day:

From whence came this macabre revelation? Archbishop Cranmer has found the answer:

“The article to which she refers is ‘Satanism in Britain Today’ by Graham Harvey in the Journal of Contemporary Religion (10:3, 1995). So it’s not so contemporary, but certainly worth a bit of extrapolation. Harvey found that 45 per cent of self-identifying Satanists voted Conservative in the 1992 General Election.”

So Suzanne was only slightly exaggerating. Lynton Crosby’s core vote strategy in action…

Lord Ruffley Not Likely

Disgraced David Ruffley continues to strut around Westminster without a care in the world, despite being deselected by his local association in Suffolk following his caution for assaulting his girlfriend. As Guido revealed in the Sun on Sunday, now cocky Ruffley has told friends that he is line for a peerage when he stands down. Such a move would invoke the wrath of female Tory aides who complained to party whips about his behaviour:

 “News to us” says a Downing Street source.

Monday, December 1, 2014

WATCH: Penny’s Commons Cock Controversy Compilation

Always the provider of public service blogging, Guido has collated the highlights of Penny Mordaunt’s Commons “cock welfare” debate – as revealed in the Sun on Sunday and elsewhere – into a six second clip. A cock and bull story…

Friday, November 28, 2014

Paxo Denies Claims He Will Run for Mayor

Jeremy Paxman has shot down the Times‘ suggestion that he is considering running to replace Boris as the Tory candidate for Mayor of London:

Though the invitation to see the PM suggests it wasn’t entirely fantasy…

Thursday, November 27, 2014

Poll: UKIP-Tory Tactical Voting in Doncaster Would Unseat Ed
+Labour Just 3% Behind Clegg in Sheffield
+Farage Trails Tories By 5% in South Thanet

“How many Tories in Doncaster will be tempted to lend UKIP their vote, just this once?” ponders Lord A.

Vote Tory, get Labour up in Donny…

UPDATE I: Clegg is not safe in Sheffield Hallam, while Farage is struggling in South Thanet:

UPDATE II: Miliband’s constituents trust Cameron and Osborne more with the economy than their own MP and Ed Balls:

UPDATE III: Unfortunately this turns out to be bollocks, see: Lord Ashcroft: I Screwed Up That Doncaster Poll, Sorry

Labour Candidate Posts Full Frontal Vagina Pic on Twitter

Tory MP Karl McCartney appears to have ‘done a Dromey’, in other words ‘favouriting’ a saucy picture on his Twitter account. His Labour opponent’s decision to flag this up, uncensored, to her followers will have had them choking on their lunch:

lucy

Red faces all round…

UPDATE:

Searing UKIP Attack Ad Hits Tories Hard on Immigration


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