BoJo: I am Back

Bow down… but seriously, check out that sexy look from Rees Mogg. Ohhh.

Another Mitchell Police / Bike Run In

Cylicists in Westminster are being forced to dismount and walk their bikes through the temporary pedestrianised zone today thanks to the Queen’s Speech.

One person looked particularly pleased…

Blue on Blue: First Shots Fired in EU Row

If Cameron pushed through HRA reform today he would be accused of rushing it by critics. Just as his fast-tracking of the EU referendum bill has irritated others. Here’s Liam Fox accusing No. 10 of not being ‘entirely honourable':

“Those who are urging him to go for a referendum in 2016, I think, have ulterior motives which are not entirely honourable. I think they want to see a decision made quickly to limit the level of debate in the United Kingdom; I think that they are afraid that if we have a very full debate then some of the real unacceptable issues in Europe at the present time will become all the more clearly seen by the British public.”

After years of demanding a referendum, suddenly on the cusp of one, there is a dawning realisation amongst eurosceptics that they will in all likelihood lose… 

Ivan-o Idea What I Pay My Staff

It all went a bit Natalie Bennett for wannabe Tory mayoral candidate Ivan Massow on LBC this evening:

When asked why he was calling for a London Living Wage yet paying his staff the minimum wage all Ivan could muster was: “oh God”. Yikes.

Dave Leaves Juncker Hanging

The PM is in Latvia for a meeting with EU leaders, where he bumped into his old high-fiving friend Jean-Claude Juncker:

At least one of them learnt their lesson from last time

Via Mirror

Boris Tells Unionised Cabbies: “It’s Called the Free Market”

Ever the equal opportunity offender, Boris has evened up his dig at Uber by antagonising black cab drivers. He told a hostile audience of cabbies in the London Assembly public gallery:

“You are dealing with a huge economic force which is consumer choice and the taxi trade needs to recognise that. Everywhere I go I see yellow lights and I can see the taxi trade is dying and it grieves me, but it is very, very difficult to fight a huge change in consumer preference.

[Heckler shouts that cabbies are being undercut.]

Yes they are. It’s called the free market… There’s a rail strike on Tuesday, you might get some fares.”

Yet rather than take advantage of the strike, cabbies are instead planning on spending the day protesting themselves…

Theresa May Slams “Scaremongering” Police Federation

Theresa May stood up in front of the Police Federation this afternoon and tore them a new one:

“This weekend the federation warned that spending reductions mean that we will be forced to adopt a paramilitary style of policing in Britain. Today you said that neighbourhood police officers are an endangered species.

I have to tell you that this kind of scaremongering does nobody any good. It doesn’t serve you, it doesn’t serve the officers you represent and it does not serve the public.

In 2002 you said David Blunkett had done more harm to the police in five minutes than others have taken years to do. In 2004 you said Labour were going to destroy policing in this country for ever. And in 2007 you said the government had betrayed the police.

Now, I disagree with Labour policies, but even I don’t think those things are true.

You said police officers were demoralised in 2002, 2004 and 2007 and 2012. You warned of police officers’ anger in 2002, 2005 and 2008. And you warned that the police and the public were being put in danger in 2001, 2004 and 2007.

The truth is that crime fell in each of those years. It has fallen further since, and our country is safer than it has ever been.

So, please, for your sake, and for the thousands of police officers who work so hard every day, this crying wolf has to stop.”

To polite applause…

Hilton’s Hipsters & High Tories

hilton-more-human

Tonight’s launch party for Steve Hilton’s new book More Human brought out an A-list crowd of high Tories and hipsters. Held in Rohan Silva’s SecondHome tech hub in East London it was more a Cameroon re-union party than a book launch. In the wigwam Hilton, dressed appropriately in guru colours of yellow and orange, held court to a crowd including David Cameron and George Osborne as well as Cabinet ministers from past and present. Jeremy Hunt mingled with the likes of Lord Heseltine and Lord Howard among internet hipsters whilst entertained by a Hungarian folk band – much to the amusement of Steve Hilton’s mum. This was the authentic über-modernisers wigwam in which Rohan invited the assembled great and the good to wander barefoot…

Hilton’s speech was one of thanks and a lighthearted powerpoint remembering his time on Team Cameron. He spoke of the stream of emails he received in California before the election complaining about the negativity of the Tory campaign, all imploring him to come and bring some sunshine into the Tory message, “I said, look Dave, you hired Lynton Crosby…”.  The PM laughed…

The Hungarian band played on – with the crowd joining in to sing “Happy Birthday” to Oliver Letwin. Heseltine flirted with twentysomethings, Samantha Cameron beamed at Gabby Bertin. All is well now Miliband’s red terror has been defeated. Apart from Steve Hilton wanting to overthrow global capitalism…

Watch also: Steve Hilton’s Trippy Newsnight Segment 

Tory / Bercow Love In Continues

New Tory Party Deputy Chairman Rob Halfon has told The Sun he wants to change the Tory party logo from an tree to a ladder:

“We are the party of the ladder, it was Churchill who first said that. The

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Ivan Massow Launch Strikes Sour Note

Some might say mocking up a £100,000 note with your face on it isn’t the best way for a millionaire politician to show he is in touch with the concerns of everyday people. Yet that is what optimistic Tory London […]

+ READ MORE +

Ben Harris-Quinney OUT of Bow Group

Following a successful round of media interviews during the election campaign, Guido understands that Bow Group chairman Been Harris-Quinney has decided to step down to spend more time with his numerous other made up jobs. Every single patron of the […]

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Whips Warn Newbie MPs To Avoid Guido

Newbie Tory MPs have been warned during an initiation briefing of the perils of Guido.

Tory whips told the fresh meat ‘to just be careful’ when Guido is around…

Meanwhile, you can get in touch to brief against your new […]

+ READ MORE +



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Quote of the Day

Mary Creagh’s coded attack on Ed Miliband…

‘I want the country to be united behind a single vision, we aren’t going to do it by sort of having a Rubik’s Cube approach to politics’. 

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