Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Speaker’s Spokesperson: “Tories Will Aim to Buy the Election”
Bercow’s Spinner Abandons Impartiality in Extraordinary Rant

Justine McGuinness is the official spokesperson to the Speaker of the House of Commons and a key member of Speaker’s Office, which is bound by strict impartiality rules dictating: “The Speaker must be above party political controversy and must be seen to be completely impartial in all public matters”. Today McGuinness addressed LibDem conference, waiving her impartiality with an extraordinary attack on the Tories, Labour and UKIP:

“The Tories will aim to buy the election with the millions of pounds donated to them by their hot money hedge fund friends. Labour will seek to steal the election, relying on an electoral system so biased in their favour that 35% of the vote could deliver them 55% of seats. UKIP will try and hijack the election by turning it into an argument about Europe and immigration as Nigel Farage swans around suburbia selling himself as some sort of suburban saloon bar Socrates.”

She was a LibDem candidate in 2005. This is going to kick up a big fuss…

Monday, October 6, 2014

More Mixed Messaging From the Labour Party

David Ward, according to Labour, when he says something Labour disagree with:

“vile and irresponsible.”

David Ward, according to Labour, when he says something Labour agree with:

A specular example of cake-based consumption and retention policy in action.

Can Anyone Work Out the Top Line?

Thursday, October 2, 2014

Coalition Relations Update: “Nick Clegg is a W**ker”

Once source at the Home Office said what everyone was thinking after the Deputy PM described Theresa May’s conference speech as “a new low for coalition relations”, telling MailOnline: “Nick Clegg is a w**ker”. 216 coalicious days to go…

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

UKIP Trolls Lobby With Donation Damp Squib

Not content with inviting the press to a media reception in Doncaster and then making them pay for their own drinks, UKIP this afternoon dragged half of Her Majesty’s loyal press corp to Bristol only to disappoint them with a Thick of It-style non-announcement. Despite stoking rumours of another defection, in the end the press pack had to make do with Tory turncoat Arron Banks announcing he would be upping his donation to £1 million:

Not enough to knock Dave off the News at Ten, though a million quid will pay for a lot of posters…

Thin Purple Line: Labour UKIP Attack Tempts Fate

Labour are going big on their ‘UKIP are more Tory than the Tories’ line this morning following the defection of Tory donor Arron Banks to Nigel Farage’s party. Attack dog Michael Dugher tells the Guardian:

“David Cameron is haemorrhaging support and his authority is ebbing away. He can’t control his party, who clearly have no confidence in his leadership. And once again we see that Ukip are reliant on Tory money as well as Tory policy and Tory politicians, putting paid to the idea that they stand up for working people.”

Continuing with the same rhetoric they used to fight the tanks on their lawn up in Doncaster last week:

The problem with this line is that for increasing numbers of voters in Labour strongholds up north, UKIP is becoming more Labour than Labour. Traditional Labour voters are already switching over, and Dugher and co and going to be left red-faced when inevitably a big name party figure jumps ship and completely discredits this attack. First Labour ignored UKIP, then they laughed at them, but what happens if one of their MPs was to defect?

Friday, September 19, 2014

LibDems Bury Hancock Resignation News at Midnight

A nice touch from LibDem spinners to announce Mike Hancock’s resignation from the party at midnight while the nation’s journalists were looking elsewhere, especially since he handed in his letter several days ago. Guido cannot imagine why they wanted to bury the news about their MP who had confessed to inappropriate sexual behaviour with a mentally ill constituent, which was then covered up by the party, and ignored by Nick Clegg‘s office. What was that about the LibDems taking a long hard look in the mirror?

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Another LibDem Contribution to Statistical Excellence

Guido can only doff his cap to the LibDems for this piece of statistical brilliance. The unrivalled data wizards over at Great George Street, for whom any budding student of stats should take inspiration, have produced the following masterpiece on their membership numbers:

With no axes or numbers whatsoever, it really is a quite beautiful example of how to make a 5% increase in members over five quarters look like a 300% rise. Guido would never want to help a rival, but he would not begrudge the LibDems entering this effort at next year’s Royal Statistical Society awardsThe Guy Newsroom salutes you…

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Good Day to Bury Bad Poos

If Guido were to com-pile a list of really sh*t press releases dumped out by the government, this would probably come in at number two.

Apparently:

“Thousands of people every year will be asked by their GP or other healthcare professional to give a stool (poo) sample for testing. A lot of people find the idea of this unpleasant and the pot is small so how do you fill it?”

The definition of government waste.

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

TORY WARS: May / Oliver Airwaves Briefing Spat

As you read in last week’s Sun on Sunday or this morning’s Times, Theresa May is on the war path with the Number 10 operation, again. Rachel Sylvester reports:

‘Theresa May got into an argument with No 10 over the timing of a policy announcement. She wanted to reveal the government’s plans in the House of Commons, observing parliamentary propriety, but the prime minister’s office pressed her to give an interview to Radio 4’s Today programme instead. If she did not do so, she was told: “We will lose the next three hours.’

Now which expert spinner could that have been? 

As Guido reported ten days ago, “tension boiled over recently with Oliver going shouty-crackers and demanding the Home Secretary show him some respect.” It seems May’s idea of showing him some respect was briefing Rachel Sylvester.


Seen Elsewhere

Cam Cannot Stem EU Immigration | David Keighley
9 Mansion Tax Questions for Ed Balls | TPA
Politicians are Lying to You About Immigration | Alex Wickham
Give Journalists Public Interest Defence in Law | Guardian
Cameron is Going to Have to Deal With UKIP | Dan Hodges
Opinions on Key Issues By Constituency | Red Box
Britain Irrelevant Inside EU | Dan Hannan
Cameron Heading for Fall on Europe | Rachel Sylvester
Lords Speaker Spends £350 on Two Mile Limo Ride | Sun
Shapps Slaps Down Barroso “Propaganda” | City AM
Bookies v Pollsters: What We Learned From IndyRef | Paddy Power


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Chris Bryant talks to the Times Diary about a famous gay actor:

“I don’t think I’ve had sex with him. He says we had sex in Clapham. I’m fairly certain I’ve never had sex south of the river”



Progressive Inclusion Champion says:

Great to hear Carswell call for inclusive policies and that UKIP must stand for first and second generation immigrants as much as the English.


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